Dwarf Fortress Wiki - User contributions [en]

Modification:Deserted squad mod

2009-12-20T21:44:27Z

Karl: /* Storyline */

{{mod}}

It is essentially an entire re-write of Dwarf Fortress. It adds new creatures, new entities, new Megabeasts, and new minerals.

==Storyline==
The world of Dawncastle has experianced a terrible disaster--the Dark Wizards, Sorcerers and
Dracon have made a pact to destroy the world. For the most part, they succeeded--the dwarves,
once a great and powerful race, have fallen, and some, tempted by greed and power, joined the
Dark Allies. Some of the Elves, sworn to vengeance on this menace, have exiled themselves to
prevent interferance from the rest of their kind.

The goblins, a mountainous species, have been engulfed in a civil war. The basilisks have
been awoken from their eternal slumber, wreaking havoc on all civilizations. The drakes have
begun to interbreed with basilisks, creating the dreaded dragons--and the demons, once
peaceful, have begun to attack, forcing the last clan of wizards to lock them away into
chambers deep underground, encased in solid adamantine.

And the Dark Allies have created a large monsterous goblinoid--the Veilcarisi--to spread
their will throughout the land, though the Veilcarisi wanted slaves--Dark Wizard slaves--and
they turned against their makers.

This is the world from which the Dwarves would rebuild their race--through any means
necessary...

== New [[creature]]s ==
* Giant Tarantula: A giant spider, primarily used by the Dracon entity.
* Armoured elephant: A large, crudely armored elephant, used by the Dracon, Orc, Veilcarisi, and Giant Elf
* War wolf: A wolf with light armor, sharp claws, and serrated teeth. Primarily used by the Dracon entity
* Megalodon: A giant shark, capable of attacking any creature in its domain, including dwarves who fall into the ocean
* Mechanical Spider: Wild, tamable, and trainable with an average animal trainer
* Mechanical scorpion: Wild, tamable, and trainable by an average animal trainer
* Mechanical wolf: Wild, tamable, and trainable by an average animal trainer
* Mechanical dog: Wild, tamable, and trainable by an average animal trainer

== New entities ==
* [[Dracon mod|Dracon]]: Larger, more dangerous versions of the Orcs
* Veilcarisi: Large goblins that can evade any trap and can take on 7 champion dwarves. Will not trade
*Western Dwarves: Dwarves
*Eastern Dwarves: Dwarves
*Corrupt Dwarves: Dwarves that will attack you
*Cave Humans: Humans that live in caves
*Western Humans: Humans
*Eastern Humans: Humans
*Western Elves: Elves
*Eastern Elves: Elves
*Exiled Elves: Elves that will attack you
*Mountain Goblins: Goblins that are friendly
*Twisted Goblins: Goblins that will attack you
*Orcs: Giant goblinoid creatures that are incredibly strong and can destroy a fortress in a single go. Will not ambush you--they just besiege you

== New minerals ==

=== [[Metal]]s ===
* Alumibroniorn: An alloy of alluminum, bronze, and iron.

=== [[Stone]]s ===
* Raw adamintite: Similar to adamantine, but not nearly as valuable.

=

== New [[Megabeast]]s ==
*Black Basilisk
*Common Basilisk
*Yellow Basilisk
*Mechanical Basilisk
*Fire Dragon
*Water Dragon
*Poisoned Dragon
*Fire Hydra
*Water Hydra
*Poisoned Hydra
*Titan
*Titan [two kinds]

== Development ==
The prototype, not yet available, is currently being tested for impurities before being released. The latest update to the program was 12/19/09.

The mod is set to be released some time in 2010, though when is currently unknown.

Main Page/Quote

2009-12-20T02:11:55Z

Karl: Learn how to use this page if you want to add quote -_-'

{{Choose|c={{rand|89}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|Bug #597: Flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy.
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|The carp has drowned.
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats. --Someone in Headshoots
|"As Manbaspecut, Human Merchant is stricken by melancholy!" "Muskox has gone stark raving mad!" I think something is wrong with the human caravan...
|"Somebody needs to build an active volcano inside a fortress inside an active volcano." --Boksi
|It has stats. It can be killed.
|Bug #432: Bones pop out of coffins.
|Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago.
|If I remembered what the fucking lever did, I'd pull it! <...pulls lever anyway...>
|Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
|"So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy a dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??"
|Kara Mase, the Glory of Amusing: Engraved on the wall is an image of a dwarf and an elf. The dwarf is committing a depraved act on the elf.
|Once saw a water skin with red beryl spikes. I still wonder how you would drink from that.
|Watching a kobold thief be chased by batman is very satisfying.
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

Template:Starting FAQ

2009-12-19T19:05:57Z

Karl: Undo revision 59933 by 99.35.92.13 (Talk) -- No point in adding an empty link

<center>
{| class="collapsible collapsed infobox" style="background-color: #f9f9f9; border: 1px solid #aaa; font-size: 90%; margin: 1em 0em 0em; padding: 2px; text-align: center; width: 60%;"
! colspan="2" style="border: 1px solid #aaa; font-weight:bold; background-color: #ccf; padding-left: 1em; padding-right: 1em;" | '''Beginner's guide FAQ'''
|-
| [[Quickstart guide]] Download a saved game which has a basic fort started, and guides you through a few simple tasks.
|-
| [[Your first fortress]] The bare minimum you need to know to get you from installation, to playing.
|-
|height="10"|
|-
| [[How do I get my dwarves to do stuff|How do I get my dwarves to do stuff?]]
|-
| [[Location|Where in the world should I settle?]]
|-
| [[Where in my area should I build my fort|Where in my area should I build my fort?]]
|-
| [[What should I build first|What should I build first?]]
|-
| [[Starting_builds|What skills and items should I equip my dwarves with?]]
|-
| [[How do I assign tasks to specific dwarves|How do I assign tasks to specific dwarves?]]
|-
| [[Immigration|How do I get more dwarves?]]
|-
| [[How to safely start fortress mode]]
|-
| [[Laptop_keyboard|HELP! My +/- keys aren't working!]]


|-
|height="10"|
|-
| {{Edit|Template:Starting_FAQ|Add a question to the Starting FAQ}}
|-
| [[Frequently Asked Questions|Back to the Main FAQ]]
|}</center>

<includeonly>[[Category:FAQ - Starting]]</includeonly>
<noinclude>[[Category:FAQ templates]]</noinclude>

User talk:LaVacaMorada

2009-12-17T14:35:49Z

Karl:

Welcome to this wiki! Dwarf Fortress rapidly becomes more complicated, and we're always glad to have new writers. 
Since you should try to follow wiki standards, and you probably don't know ours yet, we've made a list of basic guidelines. Note that this is a template, not a customized message for you.
* To tell us who you are when you talk, please sign your posts on discussion pages by typing <code><nowiki>--~~~~</nowiki></code> after your posts. This can also be inserted with the [[Image:Button sig756222.png]] button if JavaScript is enabled.
* Don't put a question mark in the title of a page. Question marks mess things up, and your page will be moved to a different name.
* When making comments on a talk page, use one more colon before each line in your comment than was used in the comment you reply to. In general, put exactly one empty line between comments by different users but do not use blank lines inside of a comment.
* Avoid making many small edits to a page. Instead, try to make one large edit. This makes the history of the page a lot easier to read.
* Don't edit the user page of another user. If you want to tell them something, add the comment to their talk page.
* If you put a comment at the bottom of a talk page with section headers, you've probably put it in a section. Putting things in the wrong sections is confusing. You can create a section!
* Generally, [[Dwarf_Fortress_Wiki:Community_Portal#We_are_doing_this.21_Let_us_do_it_right.|read and follow the rules.]] They're like a little constitution, except not boring! Really, read them.
<div align=center><div style="width: 28em; padding: 0.5em; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-top: 0.5em; border: 1px solid #ccc; background: #eee; text-align: center">''"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]''</div></div>
--[[User:Briess|Briess]] 00:52, 27 September 2009 (UTC)

== [[Exploratory mining]] ==

I'm a bit confused as to what you mean by labor vs. net effect...
How about the definition in the article? [[Exploratory_mining#Labor]] --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 07:20, 1 November 2009 (UTC)
:Which one? I see two of them:
:*"Labor is the amount of work that goes into the digging process."
:*"The labor factor is the fraction of stone dug out of an area, and as such, it's a percentage, between 0 and 100%."
:These definitions don't agree with each other. Under the first definition, digging a tunnel, digging a channel, carving a ramp, and carving a stairway should all count as the same amount of labor, since they take a miner the same amount of time. Under the second, a channel or ramp counts for twice as much as a tunnel or stairway. Are we concerned with the amount of time it takes to mine, or the amount of stone produced? --[[User:LaVacaMorada|LaVacaMorada]] 11:27, 1 November 2009 (UTC)
::Ah - the second can be read two different ways, and now that you point it out it is not airtight phrasing. It should be read in light of the first, which is "...''the fraction of tiles required to be designated for digging''...", not "...''the fraction of tiles that are removed by digging''...", the difference only being relevant in ramps (or cave-ins). Without your ramp example, they are one and the same. Will edit. (However, do you really not grok that this is the only relevant meaning of the word "labor" in this context? That to be consistent with every other "Labor: %" value in this article, this ''has'' to be the only meaning possible?) --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 18:20, 1 November 2009 (UTC)
:::Obviously I understand that it has to be some kind of ratio based on the amount of mining done per unit area. However, both "percentage of tiles designated" and "percentage of tiles removed" were consistent with all of the values in the articles until I added in the example involving ramps. I initially assumed that it meant "percentage of tiles designated", but then you edited the example using "percentage of tiles removed" as the criterion, which is what confused me. --[[User:LaVacaMorada|LaVacaMorada]] 19:23, 1 November 2009 (UTC)
::::Um... no, actually, not so much. The edit comment I made was " ''It's about "labor", not "net effect"'' " - your response was "''Ordinarily, I would expect labor to refer to the number of mining jobs necessary to dig out a particular area..''." - which is what we just agreed upon, and where I started, but not what your original edit implied with the "7%" tangent. I think the rest was you projecting something more into my edit. But I think it's all good now? Interesting pattern, btw - is it yours? (Hard to stitch together.)--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 20:25, 1 November 2009 (UTC)
:::::You edited it to say 14.2%, or one in seven tiles, which is the "percentage of tiles removed" by one up-ramp and one down-ramp in every 14 tiles. If we're going with "percentage of tiles designated", it should be changed back to 7.14% or one in fourteen, for one up-ramp every 14 tiles with the down-ramps being free. I did come up with this pattern, although I was heavily inspired by other stuff on this wiki. --[[User:LaVacaMorada|LaVacaMorada]] 21:29, 1 November 2009 (UTC)
::::::...um, that's because I'm an idiot. I counted up, from one "up-ramp" to the next, 7 tiles - I didn't notice that they are not repeated every column, but every ''other'' column, and that they are 14 tiles apart in rows. I noted the 1-offset in the pattern vertically, but the pattern as shown is not large enough to show that the pattern repeated horizontally only over a larger distance (which I missed). So your "1/7" comment was the bait that I bit on, and the rest we were agreeing on the whole time. Edited (back) to reflect that. Make sure it looks right now [[Exploratory_mining#Diagonal_ramps]]. ''(D'OH!)''--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 22:48, 1 November 2009 (UTC)
:::::::The diagram is correct, but the part about losing stone permanently isn't (the stone falls down to the up ramp - you should see 2 stones if you look there, provided you don't lose either one to an unskilled miner). Changing that part back. --[[User:LaVacaMorada|LaVacaMorada]] 03:57, 2 November 2009 (UTC)

== Spam ==

The point is, it serve no purpose. At all. I certainly hope you don't respond to mail spam. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 14:35, 17 December 2009 (UTC)

40d Talk:Wound

2009-12-12T19:21:37Z

Karl: /* Executing the Sick */

== Priority of [[health care]] task ==

I think the game is a bit broken in that I can have a dwarf set with [[health care]] (I know it's a redlink) as their only active task, and rather than bring food to a dwarf who seems to only be moderately injured, but is now about to die from starvation - even though there is a stockpile of prepared meals 6 tiles away, and the other dwarves are resting in the same barracks![[User:GarrieIrons|GarrieIrons]] 04:56, 12 February 2008 (EST)

I had a miner who was wounded in a mine collapse lie where he fell for a long time before someone came to pick him up, even after prioritizing that a single peasant would do nothing but Health Care. I had even made sure that the Health Care dwarf had "likes doing stuff for others" in his profile/thoughts. --[[User:FJH|FJH]] 15:40, 25 March 2009 (EST)

== Brown Wounds ==

my legendary miner will not heal his brown wounds he must have been resting for a year now. What should I do? --[[User:Hoborobo|Hoborobo]] 06:54, 10 August 2008 (EDT)

:Well, have you seen where his injury is? It could be a nervous injury, which never heals (see the wound article, its really sad).

i have a similar problem, my legendary miner broke his head and upper arm in a cave in. now he's just sitting there.
unfortunately he is in the path of my lva moat that he was diging. will he ever be moved into a bed or something. will he recover? should i open up the lava waterfall and let him die with honor

== healing speed ==
it seems that in the newest version(.38c) wounds heal at incredible speed - I watched my woodcutter fight batmen and get lightly wounded, was relieved that it was nothing worse, but when I checked back on him he was uninjured. So when my miner took on a wolf I kept a very close eye on him, and indeed he suffered moderate wounds and got a "rest" job, but the wound healed to lightly wounded before he even got back into the fortress and was gone by the time he reached his bed.--[[User:Syndic|Syndic]] 00:30, 13 March 2008 (EDT)
: chances are they have a (very) high toughness? - this will cause exactly what you describe. Send a peasant recruit into battle and you will see the difference ;) --[[User:Koltom|Koltom]] 07:20, 13 March 2008 (EDT)
::Given that they were miners and woodcutters, they would become tough before they become even [[proficient]] in their trade. As mentioned by Koltom and indeed in the article, toughness has a huge effect both on the impact of being wounded (ie tough dwarves carry on regardless) AND on the rate of healing (they get better before they make it to their bed to rest).[[User:GarrieIrons|GarrieIrons]] 07:24, 26 July 2008 (EDT)
: I only had this once when I started a fortress in a desert without any water resources. Maybe this is a hack to prevent dwarves from dying from thirst? [[User:Qwertyu|Qwertyu]] 05:20, 26 August 2008 (EDT)

I've noticed something similar to this in .40c as well. One of my miners in a new fortress, who was at best merely 'tough' sustained a red injury to his hip which had completely disappeared a few minutes later. The only unusual thing I did was draft all seven dwarves into the army first and then make them civilians after the skeletal goat was dead. I don't think the miner had even made his way to a bed to rest before this miraculous healing.[[User:Extar|Extar]] 16:06, 25 August 2008 (EDT)
: I believe every season there is a chance of a red wound healing. Perhaps he had extraordinarily high toughness and you got lucky? --[[User:Squeegy|Squeegy]] 19:53, 21 October 2008 (EDT)

(a non tough dwarf healed yellow in 2 days before even sitting in his rest bed -
we need to revisit the info here) [[ User:Höhlenschreck]]

Did a season change in those 2 days? Does this actually contradict the model we currently have?--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 12:48, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

:No. 
:Not entirely. 
:Just pointing out that healing may have become faster or different. --[[User:Höhlenschreck|Höhlenschreck]] 16:24, 2 June 2009 (UTC)

== Nervous system damage ==

I have a guard with minor neck and brain injuries, so he won't spar any more. However, he is a Talented Hammerdwarf, Skilled Armor User, and Proficient Shield User (only Novice Wrestler), so I reallocated him to use a crossbow and he does infact shoot at the archery range. This could be a good way to improve troops and get Marksdwarves that might be vaguely effective in melee combat should it come to that. He's also already Mighty, Very Agile, and Tough.

I'm thinking of adding the following to the Healing section of this page, at the end of the paragraph starting with "Wounds to the nervous system...":

"A hammerdwarf with light injuries to the nervous system may no longer spar, but will train as a Marksdwarf if allocated to use a crossbow. This can be useful given that a Marksdwarf entering melee combat uses the hammerdwarf skill to bash enemies with their crossbow. They hopefully would have also trained as Wrestlers, Armor Users, and Shield Users which will help their survival rate."

Thoughts? --[[User:TimE|TimE]]

:Seems a bit too niche to be in the article as general advice. Perhaps a generality made from that idea would be appropriate however. something like "dwarves with nervous injuries too severe to be a melee fighter may still be valulable as a Marksdwarf." --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 03:59, 4 April 2008 (EDT)

:: I think this applies to dwarves with ''any'' nervous injuries. I like the concise version though, I'll add that. --[[User:TimE|TimE]] 00:56, 3 April 2008 (EDT)

I've noticed that alot of my people with nervous damage have alot higher wrestling skill than their assigned weapon.. is it possible that people with nervous system damage spar as wrestlers still?--sindain

== Color of Wounds ==
I think that lightly wounded and lopped off are too close of a color. The lopped off color should be pink, a nice bright color with eye attracting color. This way I can tell whether or not to pay attention to that individual.--[[User:CrazyMcfobo|CrazyMcfobo]] 19:44, 15 April 2008 (EDT)

:I agree with you on that, try making a topic in the forums about it. Toady might change it.--[[User:Richards|Richards]] 21:18, 15 April 2008 (EDT)

== Spleen, kidney etc. ==

What about spleen, liver, kidneys etc ? Do they belong to "guts" ? [[User:Timst|Timst]] 10:19, 13 July 2008 (EDT)

== New version and light wounds ==

The new version and its possibility for messed up temps means that all organs can now be in all states of wounded-ness. That means you can get lightly wounded hearts and guts and lungs... etc.

Note that this is due to extreme frostbite, not heat.

[[User:Logical2u|Logical2u]] 23:36, 19 July 2008 (EDT)

I've got a war dog with lightly-wounded right lung, left lung, and heart. From combat (with a kobold thief), not from temperature exposure. -[[User:Greycat|Greycat]] 19:57, 12 April 2009 (UTC)

== wounded but not resting ==

I have a dwarf who has a yellow head wound and a red upper leg wound. In the {{k|u}} screen he shows as '''No job''', on his wound status screek ({{k|v}}{{k|w}}) he is unconscious, hungry, dehydrated and drowsy.

If he is unconscious then he is not resting. I take it he is not going to trigger any health care jobs: so does this mean he is doomed?
[[User:GarrieIrons|GarrieIrons]] 07:29, 26 July 2008 (EDT)
:He ended up dying. It seemed inevitable given that becoming unconscious seems to cancel resting.[[User:GarrieIrons|GarrieIrons]] 04:28, 1 August 2008 (EDT)
:I have a guard who's doing the same. Red lung wound and he's still trying to make his rounds as a guard. On the other hand, his toughness seems to be high enough that he's not dying from it... He rested when he was initially wounded (sparring) but got up because he was thirsty. He fell unconscious once in the process, but managed to slake his thirst. And then got up and grabbed his equipment. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]] 21:27, 5 September 2008 (EDT)
::FWIW, this guard lasted two more years limping along with a red lung until he finally died making a suicidal charge during a goblin siege. Îton Koganûker earned himself his own little decorated burial niche for his hardheaded service. Incidentally, I looked back at him and he actually had not toughness mods, so a regular dwarf survived three years with a red lung and might have survived longer if not for the charge. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]] 12:43, 11 September 2008 (EDT)
:::I have an ex-guard with a red lung injury. He's been that way for about 4 years so is it possible that lungs can't heal? At first he passed out a lot from being winded but after training him up as an engraver to improve his toughness he's able to go about a normal dwarven life. I've had a lot of odd injuries in this fortress; two guys lost both eyes somehow. One of them, a champion, seemed unperturbed by this and went on with his job for about a year until a goblin bowman took him out with a lucky shot. The other was a hunter and spammed up the announcements with "cancelled job: unconcious". He had to be... disposed of. Later, after accidentally releasing a caged titan in my entrance hall, my bone carver got a mangled stomach and lower body. I was preparing for him to die but amazingly he recovered his stomach in a season but it took him a lot longer to heal his other injury. Finally, one of my champions managed to break his lower back while sparring. I've provided him with a nice hospital where he can be looked after for the rest of his days but I fear one day he'll go beserk due to loneliness and boredom. --[[User:Paradigmlost|Paradigmlost]] 19:24, 11 February 2009 (EST)

This is caused by some problem with the bed they are placed on. Removing the bed they are on seems to fix the problem for me everytime it happens. --[[User:Engy|Engy]] 22:46, 27 March 2009 (UTC)
:I came here because of an identical issue with my swordmaster's right lung. He rested for a moment, but got up and is just "toughing it out" making his rounds, but unwilling to spar. Does your comment mean this issue can be fixed by removing all barracks beds, and his bedroom, and replacing them? Also, would some kind of note, perhaps in a standard "Caveats" section be appropriate? --[[User:The Architect|The Architect]] 10:56, 17 October 2009 (UTC)

== broken leg ==

can a dwarf with a broken leg still get around to work?
:Unfortunately, no. Anything worse then moderately wounded causes the dwarf to go sleep it off until its healed. However, ''eventually'' it will heal up and he can go back to work. --[[User:Toloran|Toloran]] 02:32, 10 August 2008 (EDT)

I have 3 dwarves who are very injured, and seem to be refusing to move, I deactivated their squad status, but none are unconcious, and none of the dwarves at ALL are helping them for some reason, they just keep walking over them, ignoring them.

I have a royal guard with a similar problem. Was wondering if it would ever heal, but I'm starting to think after more than two years that lung injuries also never heal. Mine has at least one level of toughness, though, and the only affect is that he walks slightly slower and flashes the wounded signal at me.--[[User:Pyrite|Pyrite]] 08:44, 13 December 2008 (EST)

I had a dwarf with a broken leg fall into a strange mood. He got up off his sickbed, limped to a workshop, claimed it, etc. -- all at a fraction of normal dwarf walking speed. He finished the artifact, then went back to his sickbed to finish healing. -[[User:Greycat|Greycat]] 19:55, 12 April 2009 (UTC)

== Broken brain? ==

I just got a kobold trapped in my hall of spiky death, and on its wound list was a yellow(broken) brain. I suppose that means it's going to die very soon, but it seems to be fine to me... --[[User:Cypress|Cypress]] 18:21, 30 August 2008 (EDT)

:It's a kobold. You missed all its vital spots. --[[User:Azaram|Azaram]] 23:53, 10 December 2008 (EST)

== Blind dwarf suffers nightmares of constant attack ==
I have a dwarf with a lopped off left eye and right eye (and throat? how's he still suffering??) that is convinced that he's still under attack.
He's litterally spamming with over 1000 messages that he's canceling rest: interrupted by goblin crossbowman. In the 200-300 message range it was amusing. At this point, I'm only hoping that he shuts up when another dwarf drags him off to a bed for some rest. [[User:AmisiBastet|AmisiBastet]] 14:29, 4 October 2008 (EDT)
:Put him out of his misery. In style. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 21:43, 4 October 2008 (EDT)
::How? The last of the goblin ambushes for that season shut him up for me. But I don't know how to kill off one of my own dwarves. Well... not intentionally anyway. Especially when he's so busy being unconsious that he's constantly interrupting his rest due to the memory of being shot at by a goblin. I think he got up to about 3000 messages. All his minor wounds healed up too. His head was still mangled (red) with his eyes & throat lopped off (grey). Well, until the goblin finished him off anyway. [[User:AmisiBastet|AmisiBastet]] 22:50, 5 October 2008 (EDT)
:::For future reference, you can kill one of your dwarves off by dropping a constructed floor on him. Thus, it makes some sense to make bedrooms with a way to drop floor tiles on the beds. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 23:32, 5 October 2008 (EDT)
::::Two words: Lava. Failing that, I usually went with GreyMaria's method and just tunnel out over the head of the wounded dwarf, and built/demolished floors atop him until dead. Too bad you can't build on bridges...I'd have an infirmary kept niiice and warm by a lava pit. --[[User:Eddie|Eddie]] 00:47, 6 October 2008 (EDT)
:::::LOL I wish! Poor guy collapsed above ground, about 7 steps away from the entrance to the fortress. And as for dealing with any other dwarves... I've found the lava, but they're pretty stubborn about not wanting to dig anywhere near it anymore. These bunch also seem to be only seasonal-miners too. They practically refuse to dig durring the winter & are reluctant to dig in the fall. Which leaves me to spring & summer for any fortress improvements that don't involve construction or engraving. They like farming and they like engraving. Canceling those tasks doesn't even seem to encourage them to dig. They'd rather sit around with no job than go dig out rooms near the lava. Boy, ya loose 1 dwarf to a random fire-man and the dig designations never get worked on! [[User:AmisiBastet|AmisiBastet]] 00:46, 7 October 2008 (EDT)
::::::The simplest method I've found for silencing Dwarves (Usually to put them out of their misery) is to have the a room of hospital beds connected to a pump with a nearby water source (aquifer or brook, usually). In the event that a dwarf has permanently debilitating wounds, you can simply flood the room. Even a normal door will hold back 7/7 tiles of water, so all you have to do is lock them in to make sure no other dwarves decide to open it. [[User:Xennith|Xennith]] 10:45 AM, 2 March 2009 (PST)
: As fun as it is to off wounded dwarves [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=25815.0 this thread on the message board] alleges that destroying the bed may end the message spam. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]] 17:41, 7 October 2008 (EDT)
:: Thanks for the link. I'd post there but for some odd reason my browsers won't let me register on that forum. I keep getting redirected back to the index. I can't even read the help on registering because that also redirects me back to the index. Regardless, you are correct that in my case the dwarf had not reached a bed. I think in my case it was that the goblin crossbowman that had attacked that dwarf, had later fallen into a cage trap and hadn't been killed (or left the map) yet. I've a bit of a backlog on goblins waiting to use my drowning rooms.
::: to off yer dwarf, you can put a door on their bedroom and lock em in when they sleep--[[User:Loganis|Loganis]] 14:06, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

==Animal Wounds==
How fast can animals (e.g. leopards) heal wounds? Because I have a leopard which has minor injuries on the brain, heart, lungs and guts, and I want to use it to guard my fort (i feel like im gonna be sieged soon).--[[User:Stinhad Limarezum|Stinhad Limarezum]] 08:34, 21 October 2008 (EDT)
:I'm fairly certain animals can only be healed via the animal caretaker labor. I had a cat with a mangled leg for 3 years before it stumbled into a weapon trap full of looted pikes. If the creature isn't assigned to anyone, the dwarf that trained the leopard can caretake it. [[User:HeWhoIsPale|HeWhoIsPale]] 08:44, 21 October 2008 (EDT)

:I've never studied the mechanics of animal caretaking, but I've gotten the impression that it's a "free" task -- any time your caretaker crosses paths with a wounded animal, the animal has a chance to get better. Try turning on caretaking on all your dwarves. The leopard might need to be uncaged in order for the caretaking to take place.

:But a guardian leopard alone is not going to be enough against a siege. For that, you want at least a dozen wardogs, or a set of traps at least six deep at all entrances (ten deep if they're "mere" stone traps), or some decent marksdwarves -- five or more is best, because at just the wrong moment, half of them will wander off to drink or sleep (or reload). A single champion with top-quality armor and weapon and very high shield user, armor user, and wrestling skills can potentially take out a whole squad by him or herself, but that takes about two or three years worth of sparring (with another champion) and you better hope they don't get spinal injuries or they'll stop training altogether.

:Barring that, use dogs if you got 'em, traps if you don't. And build traps anyway. You can secure a fortress in a couple of months using a couple of mechanics. And you won't get hit by an actual goblin siege until you have 80 dwarves, supposedly, though "ambushes" of about 8 goblins can come much sooner.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 19:29, 21 October 2008 (EDT)

:Well, I did get sieged, but my army decimated the ugly gobbos before they could even come close (theres a load of blood near the norhern edge now) so the leopard was of no use. Talking of ward dogs, being an idiot, I went and made most of my dogs available for pets before I realised that pets cant be trained. Luckily a pair of stray puppies grew up a day before the siege but the two war dogs which i trained were too slow and the battle was over before they reached. About the animal caretaker, I do have one but he isn't really doing anything about the leopard (and a fox which i also bought from the elves, also with same injuries) --[[User:Stinhad Limarezum|Stinhad Limarezum]] 23:51, 21 October 2008 (EDT)
::I'm fairly certain from my experiences that animal caretaking only applies to animals that 'belong' to the caretaker. The only dwarf with any skill in caretaking I've had has been my dungeon master because he has trained over a dozen wardogs that haven't been assigned elsewhere yet. Meanwhile my champions have wardogs and cats that have been mangled for years. [[User:HeWhoIsPale|HeWhoIsPale]] 08:48, 22 October 2008 (EDT)

:::I've seen animals on chains healed -- by whom, I don't know. It may just be that dwarves are more likely to heal their own pets since said pets are always in their vicinity.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 19:44, 22 October 2008 (EDT)
::::Apparently any caged animal you buy has minor wounds on the brain, heart, lungs and guts. I bought a jaguar, another leopard and a rhesus from the elves and all have the same injuries.--[[User:Stinhad Limarezum|Stinhad Limarezum]] 21:39, 22 October 2008 (EDT)
:::::I bought a black bear cage and it didn't have any wounds, could it be that the elves are traveling through a hostile region to reach your fortress? [[User:HeWhoIsPale|HeWhoIsPale]] 08:23, 23 October 2008 (EDT)

:::::Are you in a cold region? Maybe they got frostbitten on the trip to the depot.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 11:22, 23 October 2008 (EDT)

*sorry to interrupt*
i have a war dog with a red (mangled?) 'right rear leg' and 'head'. it's been like that for about a year now, crawling aruond the fortress and sitting where it's former master died (with it's/another dog's two puppies, might i add), passing out all the time. will it die soon? infact, shouldnt it be dead already, having a mangled head? (no internal organs seem to be damaged)

== Down, but not Out ==

Something I noticed earlier today: Late in my first winter, one of my dwarves was injured while sparring with swords. His leg was yellow, no blood anywhere to be seen, and he was literally right next to a bed. He would not accept any jobs, wouldn't climb into bed to rest, eat, drink water, and nobody else would help him. He lay on the floor for a few months until he got really dehydrated and fell unconscious. Finally somebody drug him to the bed and is now bringing him water. I also noticed that "He is socially crippled by thoughts that everybody is watching and judging him" in his profile. Too mistrusting of help until he is unable to say no (finally fell unconscious). I'm hoping for a full recovery now that he is accepting help. [[User:KValthaliondil|KValthaliondil]] 18:43, 3 November 2008 (EST)

:I have had this problem too...I think it is bug 360? I lost a legendary wrestler to melancholy from it already, another one is now affected by it -- I hope he collapses and gets dragged to a bed like yours did before he goes insane too.--[[User:Scrotch|Scrotch]] 20:37, 20 January 2009 (EST)

== '' verify '' ==
'' so claiming it may help, as may marking it to be dumped.(verify) '' this most definitely worked, in a most excellent manner. now my most non-non-non-heinous speardwarf can recover. Note that I had to de-forbid it first, and then mark it for dumping. has anyone else had any experience with this? also, I still do not know if he will recover, we will have to wait.--(the most non-heinous)[[User:Destor|Destor]] 21:49, 27 December 2008 (EST)(be excellent to each other)

:this worked for me, too. I also don't know whether he'll recover yet, but the bolt is out of his arm. --[[User:Khummsein|Khummsein]] 01:11, 5 March 2009 (EST)

::Worked all the way. Legendary carpenter was up and running around, eating up all my wood again. Really quickly, too (maybe a month or two game time? This after lying in bed for almost 2 years). --[[User:Khummsein|Khummsein]] 10:08, 6 March 2009 (EST)

:::i'll edit the page accordingly then [[User:Kotekzot|Kotekzot]] 17:31, 18 March 2009 (UTC)

== Dismembered Dwarves Permanently Bedridden? ==

I have a dwarf who got his hand bitten off and his upper and lower body broken. After a year or so he was completely healed, albeit still handless. He still hasn't gotten out of bed, though. Will he ever recover, or is this a bug?--[[User:Zipdog|Zipdog]] 05:22, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
: Maybe try deconstructing the bed in question, as above? (Next release will bring doctors and splints, apparently; maybe lopped off limbs will be colored purple or something other than another shade of lightly wounded gray...) --[[User:Jellyfishgreen|Jellyfishgreen]] 21:04, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
::Lopped off eyes don't prevent people from running around. Miner took a fire imp to the face. Broke hus upper body. Ouch. --[[User:Zchris13|Zchris13]] 16:33, 12 May 2009 (UTC)

== No sparring for nervous wounds, but hunting allowed? ==

Seems like you can turn your melee dwarves with mild spinal injuries to hunters and they will practice that way ;) Although it is rather a waste of time if they are not at least very agile [[User:Greep|Greep]] 04:33, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

== Lopped off limbs ==

I've a wrestling champion who, unfortunately, lost his entire left leg to a swordsgoblin's first strike, and is now bedridden.

It's not covered very clearly in the article just how badly lost limbs affect dwarves. I'd rather not kill him off (he happens to be quite popular), but I don't think he'll ever be getting out of bed again. If anyone has any evidence pointing to the contrary, I'd appreciate it.

For now, I'll just back up the save and lock him up. [[User:Pariah|Pariah]] 07:39, 1 July 2009 (UTC)

== Suffocation Mishaps ==

I just had a highly decorated Swordsdwarf suffocate to death, out of the blue, right after my military had repelled two back-to-back goblin ambushes.

I read in the Mods section that "super-dwarfs" can choke to death if modded so they can eat bones. I haven't made any such mods, however, and I can't find anything on the Wiki about what causes suffocation, apart from smoke (no fires here...)
He suffocated in a 2x2 barracks where two other dwarfs were sparring.

Any ideas? - [[User:Abkajud|Abkajud]] 04:14, 13 September 2009 (UTC)
*He probably had a sparring accident that punctured both of his lungs. --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 04:29, 13 September 2009 (UTC)

Oh, good God! Well, thanks for the tip ^_^ - [[User:Abkajud|Abkajud]] 04:33, 13 September 2009 (UTC)

== Blindness ==

The leader of my squad of axe-dwarves took some damage in a recent fight, including the loss of both eyes and ears. All injuries healed within the day except for the eyes (she is "very tough"), so I demobbed her. Later I noticed she had been trying to cut down the same tree for about half an hour real time despite being a "talented" wood cutter (this is df_28_181_40d11).

Two questions: does blindness heal naturally, at season-change (with luck) or never; and is it known what types of tasks can and can't effectively be done by a blind dwarf? [[User:Hv|Hv]] 08:55, 21 October 2009 (UTC)
:Blindness never heals, though I haven't observed it to interfere with workshop activities - one of my 3 tanners got both of his eyes torn out by a wolf early in the fortress, and while he initially passed out a lot, he eventually leveled his toughness up high enough that he doesn't notice it anymore, and he performs his tasks just fine. --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 13:44, 21 October 2009 (UTC)
::Thanks. She is my only Appraiser too, and she still manages just fine at trading - I guess you really can ''feel'' the quality. :) [[User:Hv|Hv]] 20:59, 23 October 2009 (UTC)

== Organ wound not possible ==

In reference to a "moderate wound to the gut", see this forum discussion:
[http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=44204.0 "Impossible Gut Injury?"] --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 19:04, 1 November 2009 (UTC)

== On the subject of broken body parts and permanent damage ==

Hi, all! I have a few tiny questions and odd things I'd like to mention.

First, it does seem possible for eyes to be broken, at least in the most current version. [http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b30/A-chana/Dwarf%20Fortress/52.png This cougar] suffered that amongst other nasty things, but my dwarf didn't stop to ask it how many fingers he was holding up, so I still don't know the effects on vision or if such a wound is permanent (see third question). For the record, it got this way by being attacked by an unarmed dabbling/novice wrestler. I think the left eye was sent into dark yellow in one of the first strikes of the fight, and stayed that way until the dwarf pummeled the cougar's unconscious body for a while (it was one of the last few blows dealt to the cougar).

Second, does the lower body mean anything in terms of walking? I had a berserk dwarf try to take down an experienced founder, and he came away with a broken lower body (hips, legs, and spine were not wounded). He could still run about just as well as the fleeing civilians (he was merely Agile, no Toughness, and most of the other civs had some experience. Plus, he became tired while murdering the second victim but didn't seem too affected by it) and was able to take down four with no trouble before a war dog decided to wreck him. He was enraged at one point while fighting the founder, but came down from that high before he could get to work on beating down a much weaker migrant. I'm not sure if the lower body doesn't affect walking, if berserk dwarves will ignore certain injuries, or some combo of the two. On a similar subject, if the lower body doesn't affect walking, would hips affect it? Part of the massacre involved someone with a mangled hip, and I'm wondering if she could have been able to walk with that.

Third, what other organs can be permanently damaged? That same war dog had gotten to me lightly damaged (probably from temperatures during travel), and it doesn't seem to be recovering any of the wounds. I know the brain, neck, and spine aren't going to heal, but he still has wounded lungs, guts, and heart, so I guess those won't heal either. It's nothing important -- he's still a beast that likes bisecting its foes (like the broken-lower-body dwarf above, who is now severed-lower-body dwarf), but I'm just curious as to what other organs might not heal fully (I'm mostly curious on eyes right now, since they seem like they could be pretty sensitive to being broken/possibly mangled). Also, does severity affect it? I mean, I know lopped off technically counts as a degree of severity and will stick, but still. Example being, an arm (not necessarily an arm -- even internal organs like the spleen count too) is horribly mangled, probably almost to the point of being lopped off. Could it still make a full recovery, even over many, many years, or will it stay permanently slightly damaged, if not in outright sorry shape? (Edit to elaborate: The organ/limb in question would make full recoveries from minor wounds.)

Thanks for helping Again, none of this is ground-breakingly important, but I'm just curious to know. -[[User:A-chana|A-chana]] 16:00, 14 November 2009 (UTC)

== Executing the Sick ==

My Captain of the Guard and Legendary Miner somehow got her spine snapped like a piece of thatch by the weak-ass mayor (bless her :( ) and now is going to be a burden on the society she served to protect for the rest of her (very long) life. There are also several other injured people from a huge tantrum chain who are also bed-bound.

How would I go about disposing of them?

--[[User:Iban|Iban]] 05:59, 12 December 2009 (UTC)

: Drown them with water or... magma / release a wild animal near them / do a cave-in on them. The choice is yours. see [[Unfortunate_accident]] for more creative info. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 19:21, 12 December 2009 (UTC)

40d Talk:Rest

2009-11-29T17:51:33Z

Karl: /* Soldier Ignoring Rest */

If a dwarf would cancel "Rest" for whatever reason, will the dwarf still recover?

My situation; My injured Carpenter (Moderate wound to a leg; presumably can't walk.) was resting in bed. But, to my good (or bad) fortune, it had acquired a fey mood. It managed to hobble over to the workshop on it's wounded leg, but now that the artifact is complete it can't seem to leave, nor does it try to "rest" again. Do I need to convince another dwarf to pull it back over to the bed?--[[User:Mizzy|Mizzy]] 23:36, 25 July 2008 (EDT)

Another dwarf seems to have brought it back. It just took awhile for some reason, and now the carpenter is resting again.--[[User:Mizzy|Mizzy]] 23:36, 25 July 2008 (EDT)

==Soldier Ignoring Rest==
I have a wrestler with a broken arm, I think its a sparring injury. But he just does not want to rest. He's walking around normally and waiting at the meeting hall as if he was all right. BTW All my beds are inside. I tried deactivating him, putting him into Fortress/Royal Guard, stationing him at a bed but nothing worked. Help!!! What should I do!--[[User:Stinhad Limarezum|Stinhad Limarezum]] 06:39, 21 October 2008 (EDT)

:I believe arm injuries (even red ones?) do not necessarily impede a dwarf from his daily tasks, and don't trigger rest. It's been a while since I've seen a dwarf with an arm injury and nothing else, though.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 18:53, 21 October 2008 (EDT)

:I am having a similar problem. One of my champions (so I cannot un-enlist him, though he is in his own squad and is standing down) has a red right lung and light gray upper spine but appears to be able to go places. Sometimes he gets winded, and I did have to take away his waterskin so he could not be depressed anymore. Still, he won't go rest and heal up? Is there no hope? --[[Special:Contributions/65.190.189.62|65.190.189.62]] 03:27, 22 November 2009 (UTC)
::Upper spine is part of the nervous system and will never heal, and other sources suggest that lung damage will never heal either. Since there's no point in resting, he continues to work normally, though likely with a bit of pain. --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 04:11, 22 November 2009 (UTC)
:::So, someone with a broken neck is an invalid who will lie in bed forever? Is there any way I can "pull the plug" on a dwarf in this condition? [[Special:Contributions/24.118.120.25|24.118.120.25]] 08:53, 29 November 2009 (UTC)
:::: Oh yes, you can [[Unfortunate_accident|pull the plug]] ;) --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 17:51, 29 November 2009 (UTC)

== unconscious ==

Is lack of consciousness "normal" when resting?
[[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 12:39, 12 July 2009 (UTC)

Talk:Main Page/Quote

2009-11-29T15:25:53Z

Karl:

'''BIG BOLD & UGLY WARNING: Extreme levels of stupidity makes the administrator step in. When the administrator steps in, pages disappear or get locked.''' --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 17:08, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

== How to add quotes: ==

* Go to the line of the last quote.
* Add a line immediately after it (this should be before the closing }} brackets)
* type "|YOUR-QUOTE-HERE" on that line
:(The quote number is not functionally necessary, but it allows keeping track of how many quotes there are without counting)
* Look at the first line of the template
:It should look something like this:
<pre>{{Choose|c={{rand|37}}</pre>
*Adjust the number that is in the place of the 37 to reflect the number of quotes in the list.
*Preview your reply to make sure nothing is broken (or someone will be able to see it on the main page before it gets fixed)
*Profit!
[[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:34, 27 February 2008 (EST)

== When to add quotes: ==

So. We have a small problem here. People add quotes, people remove quotes, people un-remove quotes, and people make edit war. Suggestion: 
:Rough guidelines for [[Main Page/Quote]]:
:*New quotes are freely added.
:*Those quotes are freely removed.
:*If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion.
:*If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added.
:*If <user2> wants to get quotes re-removed once the previous consensus is old, <user2> can make a similar section.
:*Etcetera.
--[[User:Savok|Savok]] 18:24, 7 March 2009 (EST)
::I approve. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 18:53, 7 March 2009 (EST)
__TOC__

{{Archive|
# [[Talk:Main Page/Quote/archive1|Archive 1]]
}}

== Redirects in Quotes ==

Do you guys really think we should have [[]]'s in quotes? They mights help a bit, but it seems to take away a bit of the vibe. Thoughts about taking them down?
:I think the links are appropriate for drawing in and directing new users. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 17:47, 10 October 2009 (UTC)

== Inappropriate Undo ==

While you are free to re-add a removed quote, removal is a call to review those quotes which were removed. Undo is a blatant violation of that, as it doesn't necessitate even *looking* at what was removed. As such, I am undoing the undo, and ask that if the person wishes to re-add any of the quotes that he deliberately re-add the ones he actually thinks are funny. (Do note I moved a couple around because it was easier instead of de-incrementing numbers). Also, re-adding necessitates a discussion on this page - please have one before re-adding. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 20:09, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
: I want them back, 4 of the 5 were funny as they were, and there's no need to trim them since they doesnt break the page layout. Actually, I find your undo of the undo annoying, since they were fine quotes. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 20:48, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
::I deleted more than 5... =P And I moved some because it was easier than changing numbers. Which ones did you think were funny - I mean, we can have the discussion, but we need to have a discussion before they get re-added. (Also, the carp one is totally funnier with just the game quote) --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 23:50, 16 October 2009 (UTC)

== Seriously, Guys ==

I forget DF for a few months and you remove almost an entire kilobyte of quotes, along with the stupid goatse one which, while awful, was long since victorious in the protracted and bitter war over whether it should stay and in what form. Yes, it's quite clear you don't like some quotes. Yes, anyone is allowed to remove quotes but it's almost always the same very few people that do so, and the rules are clearly designed in your favor(delete anything you want with no justification, but add things only once unless you can change the deleter's mind). Would it kill you to at least '''add''' a little content to this page alongside removing so much? If I decided the main page was ugly and REMOVED IT wouldn't that still be a loss of content? Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:51, 25 October 2009 (UTC)

::Corona688, you have argued that the current system for deleting and undeleting quotes is bad. You have asked people who have removed quotes to be constructive instead. Let's turn this request around: when it comes to the issue of quote policy, please be constructive instead. I am sure you will be hard pressed to find anyone who disagrees with your complaints about the current system. They are all valid. However, despite these shortcomings, nobody has come up with a better one. If we decided the current policy was bad and just removed it without replacement, we would be worse off. "''Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave?''". [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:::I have '''already''' suggested '''several''' things before. If you think I have no ideas, you haven't been paying attention. For the record, here are some I've suggested before:
::::Don't delete quote content if you can't put something else in its place!
::::Reverse the process -- make deleting harder than adding.
::::Utilize a '''little''' self-control to realize that your personal preferences don't define funny for the entire world.
:::How's that? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 19:11, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

::::Could you be a little more specific? I'm not sure how you would go about actually implementing such a system. An example ruleset would help clear things up. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 14:22, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

:I didn't remove the goatsects one, and while i didn't find it funny, i did respect the consensus of the talk page regarding it. The one quote i did add was removed in like a month.
:However, removing stuff from this page is as important as adding stuff - both types of people are needed to ensure a quality page. Otherwise we end up either with lots of crappy quotes or very few quotes. So don't disparage one side of the equation - both are essential. That said, expecting the people adding things to be funnier wouldn't be too much to expect, would it? There's still a lot of not funny in the quote list, and a few that could be funny with a little editing. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 00:41, 26 October 2009 (UTC)
::Yes, we need both. Not many folks would bother adding quotes more than once as is though, so we're seeing a net loss of content. I don't think the primary deleters here represent the One And Only True Correct Sense Of Humor™®ⓒ, and the rules as is unfairly pit content creators against them. Almost nobody cares one way or another except about their own quotes, you can't expect a consensus to readd when a good one is deleted. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 16:57, 27 October 2009 (UTC)

:::We are not experiencing a net loss of content. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
::::Of course not. Which is why the file keeps getting smaller. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 19:07, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

== Ok, that's enough ==

Squirrelloid, you have your own humor, but don't try to impose it on other people. If you don't find something funny doesn't mean you have to remove it.

You removed these 3 lines with your last edit :
* had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
* Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
* Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.

The last one is taken from an epic forum topic, the second one is funny because of the focus the dwarf have on olivine. The first one is from the dev log...

By the way, where is it written than quote MUST be funny ? --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:27, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::Re: Readding quotes
::One person is hardly consensus. Page policy:
:::"If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion."
:::"If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added."
::I certainly don't feel you've met the burden of that, and I certainly don't find those quotes funny.
::--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:26, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::: Make it two, with corona, there's no definite number of people needed AFAIK --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:35, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::::Corona doesn't come down in favor of any particular quotes actually, nor did he contribute to the relevant discussion. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:40, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:::::By the time I find out about these massive content deletions it's usually weeks too late to do a darn thing. I'm not here continually. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:54, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

::Also, you can't just go re-instating an old version if there's multiple subsequent versions. You actually deleted new material.
::On those specific quotes. The Dev log quote sucks. The delivery is awful. There may be a good line with the same base material, but that is certainly not it.
::The second one is clearly not in-game, because its impossible to generate that, which severely detracts from its humor value.
::And I don't care how epic the thread was, the quote isn't at all interesting.
::--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:31, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

Well, YOUR modification were not funny. So I removed them. If you want them back, you have to do a call for opinion :) --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:35, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::Which, my new quote or my modification of the carp one? If you want to *remove* either, by all means, its your right. But to re-add the old material requires consensus on each and every individual quote, not just reverting. Its a violation of page policy. So stop. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:40, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:::Which you'll never, ever, ever get, and you know full well you'll never, ever, ever get. All it takes to break a consensus is you... The page policy is crafted carefully in your favor and you know it. Why don't YOU quit it? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:54, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

== Request for opinion - Deleted quote ==

Since we have someone not funny at all who try to impose is humor, or lack of, on us, and since the guideline are there, even if they are not really clear or useful as stated by corona866... Here's a request for opinion on deleted quote.

Here's the list, just add under it if you want them back, or not. That way, no one is going to cry. In 2 weeks, enough time for the regular contributor to see this topic, we could add them back or not. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
* ;-) --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

=== I had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09 ===
:Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:no, don't re-add this --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Do not want. The language is confused, and the sentence after the ellipsis is redundant with the first part. (If its shot off, of course its removed...) Basically, this is a horrible mess of a line, and since its actually a direct quote it can't be modified (although it could be snipped - i could be convinced the line through the ellipsis is worth keeping, but i'd need to be convinced) --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:09, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
::This sentence actually makes perfect sense. He had his toe shot off. He comments that it was able to be shot off because it was just narrow enough. I found this dev log funny when I read it. I don't see any reason not to re-add this one. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 00:14, 30 October 2009 (UTC)
:I don't get why toes being narrow lets you shoot it off with a crossbow. Not that funny I think. But, not terrible either. I wouldn't add it but I wouldn't kill it either. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 19:01, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

==="So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??" --alway ===
:Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:no, don't re-add this --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Do not want. That's like every fortress ever? There is nothing surprising, interesting, or amusing about this quote --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:09, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Another one that actually has some humor at times. I mean, really, you can't expect all the quotes to be grade A funny. This one does have some hilarity to it because it actually is possible to have insane impact on the entire world despite only running a single fortress. Such as when suddenly the entire Elven population seems to have dwindled due to massive wars with your fortress. I think it's a nice one that should be in the quotes. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 00:14, 30 October 2009 (UTC)
::Actually, I can expect all the quotes to be grade A funny. That's the whole point of the page policy as it stands - bad quotes get removed and only the good ones remain. Fighting for quotes you know to be subpar defeats this purpose. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 01:17, 5 November 2009 (UTC)
:::See my reply to your other post. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 07:51, 5 November 2009 (UTC)
:I want this one in, obviously. The context is they'd killed their King by accident somehow, so they really did destroy all of dwarven civillization above and beyond what most games usually do. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:56, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

=== Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine. ===
:Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Want it back --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Do not want. Utterly boring, and clearly artificial since the game cannot generate that as a set of prefstrings. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:09, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:This is a good one. And Not artificial. This came from the dwarves that were generated randomly by ToadyOne to show off the new likes/dislikes/appearance/etc. It just so happened most of them liked olivine, a lot. Some liked it twice, and one crazy dwarf, Sarvesh, only liked it. And nothing else. I think it should be added back [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 00:14, 30 October 2009 (UTC)
:Want it back. It's funny. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:57, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

=== Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones. ===
:Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:no, don't re-add this --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Do not want. Boring, and are mermaids even butcherable? --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:09, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Not the best. One of the few I don't much see a use for. Mainly because it'd be funnier if the creature in question were a different animal. Like a cat. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 00:14, 30 October 2009 (UTC)
:Don't like this one, myself. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:59, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

=== If I ''remembered'' what the &%^#*@! lever did, I'd ''pull'' it! <...pulls lever anyway...> ===
:Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Want it back --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Do not want. The material could be reworked, but the current presentation is crap. Would favor a reworded version of the same material. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:09, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:I'd only be okay with this one if it weren't so utterly annoying. "What the lever did" would work just the same and wouldn't look as stupid. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 00:14, 30 October 2009 (UTC)
:It's funny. I'd like it back. And no, neutering it doesn't make it funnier Shardok... --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:57, 4 November 2009 (UTC)
::So it should instead say "If I ''remembered'' what the fucking lever did, I'd ''pull'' it!" Because plain and simple, what I am saying is that the &%^#*@! looks like shit. It's not to do with the Language. It's to do with that it uses a stupid way of presenting it by using the symbols instead. They look plain stupid and honestly shouldn't be necessary on the wiki. Even just normal * instead would look better, but I don't see the need to keep the symbols as they are. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 21:09, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

=== <nowiki>::facepalm::</nowiki> Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago. ===
:Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Want it back --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Do not want. Don't see the value in posting something that every single player has probably thought at least 10 times. Its not noteworthy, much less funny or interesting. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:09, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:: I think it is a good quote just because every single player has probably thought at least 10 times... It´s typical DF. --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:16, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:::But why does that make it quote-worthy? It is neither especially witty, noteworthy, or interesting. I mean, there's lots of typical DF things that make for very poor quotes. You'll notice they *aren't on this page*. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:26, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
::::I think there are more poor quotes *on this page*, but I don´t think this one would be one of them. Just my opinion, let´s see what others think. --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:54, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:::::Ok, i definitely agree there are more poor quotes on the page. But every time i remove a handful someone throws a hissy fit. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 22:51, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
::::::If there's protest every time you delete... well... think about it! --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 19:35, 4 November 2009 (UTC)
:::::::Because some people just like to whine whenever something gets removed? I'd rather not see a 150 page quote list with maybe 30 that are worth keeping. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 01:15, 5 November 2009 (UTC)
::::::::And yet most people Would rather see more quotes, that aren't necessarily *great* quotes than to end up seeing the Exact same quotes over and over again. It gets boring when it shows the same ones you've seen day after day, even if each of them is a grade A quote. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 07:51, 5 November 2009 (UTC)
:::::::::There are 80 quotes on the page not counting these. At 1/day, 30 quotes gives you a full month of new material. 60 quotes would seem to trivially meet your standard. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 10:55, 5 November 2009 (UTC)
:This follows a common logic that many people start to notice. It's nice to warn users with the quotes and they don't all have to be jokes. I think it should be added in[[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 00:14, 30 October 2009 (UTC)
:It's funny and true, so I think it deserves in. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:59, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

=== Game Features: How much you ''want''? System Requirements: How much you ''got''? ===
:Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:no, don't re-add this --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 16:05, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Do not want. Boring. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:09, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
:Dislike. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 00:14, 30 October 2009 (UTC)
:I liked this one. Not love, but liked. Let's have it back. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:58, 4 November 2009 (UTC)

== Greetings, earthlings ==

:Oh hai. I suggest that everyone take a deep breath and step outside for a moment. After breathing in a nice, fresh, cleansing lungful of air, come back inside and sit back down. No one here has crafted a page policy to deviously support their own views, and no one here is out to destroy the wiki.

:Name calling and insinuations are what I'd expect from a gradeschooler, and most definitely not from editors of this wiki. I'm not going to step into this discussion any more unless I feel I have to in order to keep things civil. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 15:43, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

::Here's what's going to happen: the quote page will remain locked for 1 week. Figure out what the consensus is on policy for the quotes page. If a consensus is not reached within a week, it will be deleted and protected from recreation until a consensus is reached. I will not help form a consensus on policy on this page, since I am of the opinion that this page serves no useful purpose. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 17:47, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

== Recently removed quotes ==

Karl is continually removing every quote I add to the page, apparently solely because i insisted on enforcing page policy regarding removed quotes. There's removing quotes because you thought they were bad, and removing quotes solely because of who added them. Needless to say, this behavior is inappropriate.
:If this is the case (Wertfreie Aussage / did not follow everything what happened), you are right, but it would NOT be against rules, so maybe rules schould be changed: Will we have to diskus every change (adding an removing) here? --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 20:59, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

Here I'm asking for consensus on re-adding the last 3 removed quotes (all of which are leaps and bounds better than those on referendum above). I might also add none of them are my work (one is from the wiki, 2 are from the forums). The quotes:

Kara Mase, the Glory of Amusing: Engraved on the wall is an image of a dwarf and an elf. The dwarf is committing a depraved act on the elf.
:readd (this one is cool) --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 20:59, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

'They're firing arrows at us! Quickly! Raise the babies!!' -Urdim McSquadLeader, mother of 8
:readd --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 20:59, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

...it was found that 40% of pioneer dwarves left the Mountainhome due to "framerate issues," with a margin of error of ±Booze. --Center for Dwarven Advancement

--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:32, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

==Quote Page Policy==
I am of the opinion that the existing quote page works so long as editors edit with the motivation of improving the page.

The existing process is even working. Of the quotes i originally removed, 7 were called to a referendum, they each have 5 votes at this point:

(Toe shot off with crossbow): 2-2-1, move to re-add does not pass at present. 
(destroy dwarven civ): 3-2, move to re-add is currently passing. 
(Likes olivine): 4-1, move to re-add currently passing 
(butchering mermaids): 1-4, move to re-add does not pass at present 
(damn lever): 3-2, move to re-add currently passing 
(facepalm): 4-1, move to re-add currently passing 
(game features): 2-3, move to re-add does not pass at present 

Now, there's a week left to go, but if we were to stop now and act based on it, we'd see 4 should be re-added based on consensus, 3 failed to achieve consensus, (and ~1 wasn't even nominated for re-adding). Thus I don't think its the page policy that is a problem.

As to the purpose of the page being humor, well, the content of this talk page speaks fairly well to that, as does the nature of most of the existing quotes.

--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 18:30, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

==New Quotes==
Since the page is currently locked, archiving some stuff I'd like to add:

:This is a masterfully designed image of a werewolf and a dwarf. The werewolf is giving birth to itself. The dwarf is screaming in terror. It menaces with rings of paradox.
:Dong was a deity that occurs in the myths of The Trim Worried Sin. Dong was most often depicted as a male orc and was associated with prgnancy, birth, and children.

--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:59, 9 November 2009 (UTC)

== New quote policy ? ==
As we can clearly see, not a lot of people cares about quotes. Only one person responded to Squirrelloid after I deleted 3 quotes added by him. So it is clear that the policy right now is not working, it's easier to remove something, since no one is going to do the effort of adding it back.

Since everyone doesn't have the same sense of humor, I propose that we reverse the process, putting to a referendum the removal of any added quote instead. This way, we don't have to fight the lack of humor from a particular editor, with a vote that no one cares. If a quote is clearly not wanted, it will show by itself with a vote, since it is easier to remove stuff that add it back.

I would like to point out too, that it's written nowhere that quote must be grade A funny.--[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:25, 29 November 2009 (UTC)

Main Page/Quote

2009-11-29T15:17:52Z

Karl: Re-added some quote after referendum

{{Choose|c={{rand|91}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|The carp has drowned.
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats. --Someone in Headshoots
|"As Manbaspecut, Human Merchant is stricken by melancholy!" "Muskox has gone stark raving mad!" I think something is wrong with the human caravan...
|"Somebody needs to build an active volcano inside a fortress inside an active volcano." --Boksi
|It has stats. It can be killed.
|Bug #432: Bones pop out of coffins.
|Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago.
|If I remembered what the fucking lever did, I'd pull it! <...pulls lever anyway...>
|Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
|"So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??"
|Kara Mase, the Glory of Amusing: Engraved on the wall is an image of a dwarf and an elf. The dwarf is committing a depraved act on the elf.
|'They're firing arrows at us! Quickly! Raise the babies!!' -Urdim McSquadLeader, mother of 8
|...it was found that 40% of pioneer dwarves left the Mountainhome due to "framerate issues," with a margin of error of ±Booze. --Center for Dwarven Advancement
|Dong was a deity that occurs in the myths of The Trim Worried Sin. Dong was most often depicted as a male orc and was associated with prgnancy, birth, and children
|This is a masterfully designed image of a werewolf and a dwarf. The werewolf is giving birth to itself. The dwarf is screaming in terror. It menaces with rings of paradox
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

Main Page/Quote

2009-11-29T15:11:03Z

Karl: You have to edit the rand value at the top of the page if you add quote.

{{Choose|c={{rand|83}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|The carp has drowned.
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats. --Someone in Headshoots
|"As Manbaspecut, Human Merchant is stricken by melancholy!" "Muskox has gone stark raving mad!" I think something is wrong with the human caravan...
|"Somebody needs to build an active volcano inside a fortress inside an active volcano." --Boksi
|It has stats. It can be killed.
|Bug #432: Bones pop out of coffins.
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

User talk:Karl

2009-11-05T17:17:14Z

Karl: /* A Taste of Your Own Medicine? */

Welcome to this wiki! Dwarf Fortress rapidly becomes more complicated, and we're always glad to have new writers. 
Since we prefer that you try to follow our wiki's standards, we've made a list of basic guidelines. This is a template.
* To let us know who you are, please sign your posts on discussion pages by typing <code><nowiki>--~~~~</nowiki></code> after your posts. This can also be inserted with the [[Image:Button sig756222.png]] button if JavaScript is enabled.
* Never put a question mark in the title of a page. Question marks mess things up, and your page will be moved to a different name.
* When making comments on a talk page, use one more colon before each line in your comment than was used in the comment you reply to. Put exactly one empty line between comments by different users but do not use blank lines inside of a comment. If your comment has no indents, use <code><nowiki> </nowiki></code> after each line.
* Avoid making many small edits to a page. Instead, try to make one large edit. This makes the history of the page a lot easier to read.
* Don't edit the user page of another user. If you want to tell them something, add the comment to their talk page.
* If you put a comment at the bottom of a talk page with section headers, you've probably put it in a section. Don't put things in the wrong sections. If necessary, create a section.
* Most importantly, [[DwarfFortressWiki:Community_Portal#We_are_doing_this.21_Let_us_do_it_right.|read and follow the rules.]] Really. Read them.
<div align=center><div style="width: 28em; padding: 0.5em; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-top: 0.5em; border: 1px solid #ccc; background: #eee; text-align: center">''"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]''</div></div>--[[User:Quil|Quil]] 00:18, 28 January 2009 (EST)

Whoops, sorry. <.< I wasn't thinking. Good luck with it! [[User:Protactinium|Protactinium]] 00:22, 1 April 2009 (UTC)

Hey, you have the same first name as me.--[[User:Karlito|Karlito]] 04:48, 1 April 2009 (UTC)

clearly need d for dwarf, the fire example is just pure awesomness
Thanks... but it was written as a tragedy!--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 00:29, 15 September 2009 (UTC)
: You can laugh about everything, just not with everyone :p --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 00:48, 15 September 2009 (UTC)

THX for the typo fix... ^^ --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 08:04, 26 October 2009 (UTC)

== A Taste of Your Own Medicine? ==

Wikis are about collaborative editing, not enacting eye for an eye or tooth for a tooth revenge based on edits you think were not constructive. That merely degrades the quality of the wiki. I have plenty of reason to believe Squirrelloid acted in good faith when removing those quotes; however, you - by your own admission - have made it clear that you were not acting in good faith. Behave, and settle differences in opinion sensibly like a responsible adult. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 16:52, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

:Sure, I'm with you on this. Yet, there's a nuance between collaborative editing and imposing is view of a subject. In this case, Squirrelloid is imposing is own humor, removing quote on false pretense ( I repeat, nowhere is it written than quote must be funny ). By doing so, it's clearly impossible to re-add them back, since no one really care and you can't get a consensus on this. I'm acting in good faith too, for the wiki, as I find his removal offensive, and I'm not the only one, as you can see. There's NO reason to keep the quote page small, there's no reason to remove quote who are not necessarily funny, since quote are quote, not funny little catch phrase.

:That's why I removed quote added by him, to show him how easily it is to destroy something. Anyone can come by, delete a lot of them, and never came back, based on is own opinion. Now as per wiki rule, he has to call for opinion so he can add it back. Funny stuff to have a taste of his own medicine, Yet he prefer to come by and cry to you. If I had not admitted it, or deleted them with a fake account, it would have been the same. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 17:17, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

User talk:Karl

2009-11-05T17:17:06Z

Karl: /* A Taste of Your Own Medicine? */

Welcome to this wiki! Dwarf Fortress rapidly becomes more complicated, and we're always glad to have new writers. 
Since we prefer that you try to follow our wiki's standards, we've made a list of basic guidelines. This is a template.
* To let us know who you are, please sign your posts on discussion pages by typing <code><nowiki>--~~~~</nowiki></code> after your posts. This can also be inserted with the [[Image:Button sig756222.png]] button if JavaScript is enabled.
* Never put a question mark in the title of a page. Question marks mess things up, and your page will be moved to a different name.
* When making comments on a talk page, use one more colon before each line in your comment than was used in the comment you reply to. Put exactly one empty line between comments by different users but do not use blank lines inside of a comment. If your comment has no indents, use <code><nowiki> </nowiki></code> after each line.
* Avoid making many small edits to a page. Instead, try to make one large edit. This makes the history of the page a lot easier to read.
* Don't edit the user page of another user. If you want to tell them something, add the comment to their talk page.
* If you put a comment at the bottom of a talk page with section headers, you've probably put it in a section. Don't put things in the wrong sections. If necessary, create a section.
* Most importantly, [[DwarfFortressWiki:Community_Portal#We_are_doing_this.21_Let_us_do_it_right.|read and follow the rules.]] Really. Read them.
<div align=center><div style="width: 28em; padding: 0.5em; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-top: 0.5em; border: 1px solid #ccc; background: #eee; text-align: center">''"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]''</div></div>--[[User:Quil|Quil]] 00:18, 28 January 2009 (EST)

Whoops, sorry. <.< I wasn't thinking. Good luck with it! [[User:Protactinium|Protactinium]] 00:22, 1 April 2009 (UTC)

Hey, you have the same first name as me.--[[User:Karlito|Karlito]] 04:48, 1 April 2009 (UTC)

clearly need d for dwarf, the fire example is just pure awesomness
Thanks... but it was written as a tragedy!--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 00:29, 15 September 2009 (UTC)
: You can laugh about everything, just not with everyone :p --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 00:48, 15 September 2009 (UTC)

THX for the typo fix... ^^ --[[User:Kami|Kami]] 08:04, 26 October 2009 (UTC)

== A Taste of Your Own Medicine? ==

Wikis are about collaborative editing, not enacting eye for an eye or tooth for a tooth revenge based on edits you think were not constructive. That merely degrades the quality of the wiki. I have plenty of reason to believe Squirrelloid acted in good faith when removing those quotes; however, you - by your own admission - have made it clear that you were not acting in good faith. Behave, and settle differences in opinion sensibly like a responsible adult. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 16:52, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

:Sure, I'm with you on this. Yet, there's a nuance between collaborative editing and imposing is view of a subject. In this case, Squirrelloid is imposing is own humor, removing quote on false pretense ( I repeat, nowhere is it written than quote must be funny ). By doing so, it's clearly impossible to re-add them back, since no one really care and you can't get a consensus on this. I'm acting in good faith too, for the wiki, as I find his removal offensive, and I'm not the only one, as you can see. There's NO reason to keep the quote page small, there's no reason to remove quote who are not necessarily funny, since quote are quote, not funny little catch phrase.

That's why I removed quote added by him, to show him how easily it is to destroy something. Anyone can come by, delete a lot of them, and never came back, based on is own opinion. Now as per wiki rule, he has to call for opinion so he can add it back. Funny stuff to have a taste of his own medicine, Yet he prefer to come by and cry to you. If I had not admitted it, or deleted them with a fake account, it would have been the same. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 17:17, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

User talk:Briess

2009-11-05T16:44:07Z

Karl: /* Quote page - Karl's recent deletion constitutes vandalism */

== Extension request ==

(mostly copied from [[User talk:senso]])

A string manipulation extension would allow things to be dynamically created from raw files and other powerful templates. With the upcoming big change to creature structure in DF, something that pulls info directly from raw data would really help rework the creature pages. I've been looking through some extensions, and one of these would fit well (in order of preference)
#http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:MultiReplace
#http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:RegexParserFunctions
#http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:StringFunctions
The first one is a replacement function that can preform multiple replacements in one call (and it supports regex). The second one is a straightforward regex engine, and the last one is a collection of string manipulations. For my suggested purpose just one of the three would be enough, but none of them completely covers the tasks the of others. So, if possible, having all of them would be best. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 21:35, 15 September 2009 (UTC)

:Their functionality does overlap a lot. The differences are as follows:
*Multireplace can preform multiple replacements with one call, which the second one cannot. It can evaluate regular expressions for the replacement.
*RegexParserFunctions can preform a regex replacement. It can also be used for a regex search, which multireplace isn't meant for.
:Multireplace would be better suited for a template that generates diagrams. Regexparserfunctions could do this by nesting the function call many times, which I don't think is a good idea.
:Regexparserfunctions would be better suited for a template that pulls information from raw data files. Multireplace could do this by matching everything before and after the matchtext and cropping it, like so: '''(.*)(matchtext)(.*)=$2'''. However, to do this multireplace is effectively matching the entire page at once. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 22:50, 15 September 2009 (UTC)

::This is a possible alternative: http://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:RegexFunctions [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 05:04, 27 September 2009 (UTC)

==Archive Subdomain problem==
Sorry to bother, i sent an email to senso, but it seems that you are the new admin. Grats.
Yesterday i was surfing the archive [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Main_Page] and suddendly it started to redirect to a french blog. Now it redirect to the main wiki. (Actually every subdomain redirects to the main wiki, also invalid ones) Can you bring it back? I know that it's rarely used, but sometimes it's funny to build 2D nostalgia fortresses. --[[User:Tempus|Tempus]] 09:13, 16 September 2009 (UTC)

== Contact info? ==

Thanks for stepping up. Are you going to have an e-mail contact addy, for less public communication? --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 17:31, 16 September 2009 (UTC)

== Favicon ==

The favicon for the previous wiki seems not to have been copied over. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 18:36, 17 September 2009 (UTC)

:http://web.archive.org/web/20071127071819/http://www.dwarffortresswiki.net/favicon.ico [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 01:35, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

== You may want to watch this page ==

[[Dwarf Fortress Wiki:Spamreport]] [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 01:41, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

== Short delay for new accounts? ==

Some wikis have a policy of a short waiting period between the creation of a new user account and the ability to edit an article. (On the main wiki, I believe this is 30 days.) This delay achieves 3 things, but the only one I'm really concerned with is that it would ''seriously'' slow down bots and spammers. As a side benefit, it also prevents confused newbies from editing before they have a feel for the wiki as a whole, and spontaneous, ill-considered or mean-spirited contributions from a variety of other less-than-serious sources, such as the occasional spur-of-the-moment vandal or the late-Saturday-night beer-goggled comedy writing team. I think 1 week would be ample, but even a 48 or 72 hour period might slow the spam bots. No editor who has a worthwhile contribution to make would resent 48 hours to consider their first effort.

Just a thought.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 02:09, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

== IP numbers instead of sig? ==

When I was trying to use the standard <nowiki>--~~~~</nowiki> sig, IP numbers are coming up instead of the user/date. See [[Talk:Furniture Industry]]. Don't know what's up wi'dat. --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 06:39, 27 September 2009 (UTC)
Is it possible you were logged out at the time? I enabled anonymous edits for at least a trial period earlier today...
Okay, that must have been it - I had no notification that it wouldn't accept my edit, so... 
Otoh, I, for one, do have a problem when a page gets edited by [[24.198.25.175]] - how do I respond on their talk page? More, don't some smaller ISP's still share IP numbers between users over time in the same area? So... who, exactly, made that edit? Everyone with that ISP? Lastly, when keeping getting a feel for who is editing what, and their style, hard to mentally keep casual track of an IP addy. Just one vote, but in this case, it's one of dissent.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 18:30, 27 September 2009 (UTC)
:Well, you da boss. You may want to make a general announcement, perhaps on the "current events" page? It's rather jarring to see IP's instead of user:names, and I would never have guessed that their :talk page would work - might want to mention that, too, for all the other ignorants out there. (Also, if I never "don't log in" again, I'll never see any response to the one IP edit I did make, right? 2 user pages for each editor w/ a user:name? And even more if they (don't) log in from different locations/IP's? hrmmm...)--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 08:42, 28 September 2009 (UTC)
You're on 'er, yer honour. Sleeep gooood...--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 09:33, 28 September 2009 (UTC)

==leave==
User AcpasNorol wants to leave the wiki (see edits). I think he was blocked before, are old spamaccounts still blocked? --[[Special:Contributions/92.202.37.191|92.202.37.191]] 13:01, 8 October 2009 (UTC)

==Personal==
Thanks for cleaning up after me, including the formatting on the joining page. --[[User:The Architect|The Architect]]

== Deletion Policy ==

Redirects serve two purposes - links from other articles, and Searches. These fit under neither category, or none that also fit other policies (like singular/plural article names). And a lot depends on what links to them - since most of these were orphans (or effectively so, any reference only being a conversation re deletion) what are the odds of a search? 
Re plurals - I guess on one hand once they're there, they might as well stay, but they do set a bad precedent, and they are serving no good purpose except as an undesirable crutch. 
As far as "bizmuth bronze", that's a terrible precedent imo - do we start allowing any and every misspelled word to be "redirected"? If it's regional (armour/armor) or a common confusion (adamantium/adamantine) I support it 100%, but misspellings? Bleh. Remind me to make a redirect page for the metals iorn and steal, and sliver and goaled, among others. Double bleh. 
[[Personality modding]] was someone's pet project that was never started beyond posting the (almost blank) page, and abandoned and forgotten by late '07, not updated until [[user:I2amroy]] copied/pasted the entirety of the personality page onto it without further comment. It had no links except on 2 user pages, one where we were recently wondering "WTF ''IS'' this?", and another that's listed under "old forum links". Since the page itself was 2 years old, and has nothing that the original didn't... I think it's another that could get trimmed without loss, as the odds of anyone typing in "personality modding" are slim to none. 
So my position is "Lose 'em all, no one will ever miss them, and it's a cleaner site without" - but that's my opinion - the final policy is up to you.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 18:19, 20 October 2009 (UTC)
.... Er, I really meant if you still disagree, I'm more than willing to continue discussing what the appropriate course of action should be over any editorial policies we may have on this wiki.
Nah - I'm opinionated and vocal, but that's not the same as being always adamant in that opinion nor believing that means that I'm "right" (nor always spoiling for an argument/fight, some evidence to the contrary). I've voiced my point and the reasons behind it, and I believe you've weighed that (Respect) - so if in your estimation it doesn't wash, that's all good by me. (In this case.) ;) The policies are a collaboration as much as the content itself, and we've held to that process. So, until next time... ;D --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 23:57, 20 October 2009 (UTC)

== graphic gone missing ==

[[File:Pumpsnc4.png]], from the [[pump]] page, is MIA. I have no idea why or how, she gone.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 09:52, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

== Quote page - Karl's recent deletion constitutes vandalism ==
Karl is continually removing any and every quote I add to the quote page while leaving alone anything added by anyone else. Ie, he's clearly attacking me rather than trying to improve the quote page. This behavior is strikingly aberrant especially because he seems to be in favor of keeping any other quote no matter how bad.

I've acted in good faith to improve the quote page, and am trying to participate in a dialog about the other deleted quotes which I honestly don't feel belong on the page on their own merits. He's judging quotes i've added solely on the basis that I added them. He's also deleted other quotes i've added previously, and appends his recent changes summary with smilie faces as if he thinks he's being funny. This amounts to vandalism pure and simple. Needless to say, this is unacceptable behavior.

--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:29, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

Addendum: My attempts to talk with him about it on his talk page caused him to merely delete my text with no response. I hate to ask it, but i'm asking for administrative action - he's clearly incapable of separating personal from substantative differences. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 16:31, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

The quote I removed was based on the way you remove them, they were not grade-A funny quote. A taste of your own Medicine. You judge quote based on your biased opinion, saying they need to be funny, which is not the case, it's written nowhere on the wiki. You try to impose your own twisted sense of humor on this wiki. The fact no one cares about the quote make it hard to add them back, even if me and corona wanted to have some back, you opposed your veto, saying it was hardly a consensus.

You are by the way really condescending vs me and corona, talking about whining and all, did it ever occur to you that humor might be a personal taste ?

Oh, and by the way, it's unnecessary to copy/paste your rant on multiple page. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 16:44, 5 November 2009 (UTC)

User talk:Karl

2009-11-05T16:12:36Z

Karl: /* Quote page */

Main Page/Quote

2009-11-05T12:48:47Z

Karl: Removed three subpar quote, it's not grade A material and we have too much content already :)

{{Choose|c={{rand|79}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|The carp has drowned.
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats. --Someone in Headshoots
|"As Manbaspecut, Human Merchant is stricken by melancholy!" "Muskox has gone stark raving mad!" I think something is wrong with the human caravan...
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

Talk:Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T15:53:17Z

Karl:

== How to add quotes: ==

* Go to the line of the last quote.
* Add a line immediately after it (this should be before the closing }} brackets)
* type "|YOUR-QUOTE-HERE" on that line
:(The quote number is not functionally necessary, but it allows keeping track of how many quotes there are without counting)
* Look at the first line of the template
:It should look something like this:
<pre>{{Choose|c={{rand|37}}</pre>
*Adjust the number that is in the place of the 37 to reflect the number of quotes in the list.
*Preview your reply to make sure nothing is broken (or someone will be able to see it on the main page before it gets fixed)
*Profit!
[[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:34, 27 February 2008 (EST)

== When to add quotes: ==

So. We have a small problem here. People add quotes, people remove quotes, people un-remove quotes, and people make edit war. Suggestion: 
:Rough guidelines for [[Main Page/Quote]]:
:*New quotes are freely added.
:*Those quotes are freely removed.
:*If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion.
:*If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added.
:*If <user2> wants to get quotes re-removed once the previous consensus is old, <user2> can make a similar section.
:*Etcetera.
--[[User:Savok|Savok]] 18:24, 7 March 2009 (EST)
::I approve. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 18:53, 7 March 2009 (EST)
__TOC__

== Screenshots ==
The [http://www.dfwk.ru/index.php/%D0%97%D0%B0%D0%B3%D0%BB%D0%B0%D0%B2%D0%BD%D0%B0%D1%8F_%D1%81%D1%82%D1%80%D0%B0%D0%BD%D0%B8%D1%86%D0%B0 russian wiki] has made use of the system here to show random DF screenshots rather than quotes. I think this is a rather clever idea. Maybe we have a good spot where we could place something similar? [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 14:59, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

: Neat Idea. We could have one quote and one screenshoot. But we should define a standard size for the screenshot. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:36, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

::200x150 would make it fit the 800x600 curses, with proportional distortion all around, without taking up much in the way of page real estate. If the real estate is deemed not quite so valuable, then 400x300 would work even better, suffering half the overall distortion (but still maintaining a relatively small footprint, and keeping aspect ratio intact.) Unless we're happy with the smaller size I suggested, a page overhaul is going to be needed to find a place to put it, such that it doesn't make a jumble out of the rest of it. (Conversely, I think the 200x150 would fit very neatly in the space already allotted to one of the quotes.) --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 21:58, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

:Also, it could easily be arranged so that quotes and screenshots are paired. That way each screenshot has an accompanying caption. It would take quite a bit of work to get images for the current ones, though. I guess we could start them off as random stuff and switch them out as we go. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 02:40, 21 April 2009 (UTC)

:: How does one add screenshots? -- [[User:RomeoFalling|RomeoFalling]] 06:53, 7 October 2009 (UTC)
:::Which part don't you get? Saving screenshot, uploading image, adding it to the main page?
:::Assuming you mean the last bit - see [[Template talk:Sg]] - there should be some better form of documentation for [[Main page]] shouldn't there![[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 09:52, 7 October 2009 (UTC)

== "[B]loats" ==

For what it's worth, the nowiki formatting around square bracketed 'B' in the Toady quote about boats was simply in the interests of quoting accuracy; the original word was not capitalized and I still have that kind of formatting in my heart from college paper citations. --[[User:Alfador|Alfador]] 12:16, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

:Ah. It looked to me like a weird, failed boats/bloats pun. I don't think it really matters; you can change it back if you like. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 17:19, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

::Thank you! And done. --[[User:Alfador|Alfador]] 11:27, 25 March 2008 (EDT)

== Quote removal ==

Say, why was the "interrupted by carp" quote removed? I loved that one. --[[User:JT|JT]] 02:58, 13 April 2008 (EDT)

:Blame Savok, he thought it was unfunny. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMario]] 16:22, 24 April 2008 (EDT)

And regarding VengefulDonut stripping off that last one, PTTG's quote was simply hilarious. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? --[[User:JT|JT]] 02:19, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

Thinking on this some more, the idea that anyone can just reverse a quote at their leisure strikes me as unusual. If a quote is an obvious spam, that's one thing; if a quote is something that ''you'' don't think of as funny, I think there should be some sort of consensus system involved. There are at least a couple existing quotes that I don't find funny in the slightest (Spiders Everywhere, you've been processed, GreyMario's), but I don't remove them. --[[User:JT|JT]]

My 2☼ on the subject: 
Unless a quote is offensively directed at a particular user/person, I don't see how there are any grounds for removal. 
If it is, it's perfectly acceptable for the addressed person to remove it, if they so choose. 
Additionally, you may remove quotes of yourself, whether or not they're offensive, regardless of who added the quote. 
In all cases, it's the sole responsibility of the addressed person to remove a quote, not someone else. 
I think that makes sense.. but perhaps I'm too far off base? --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 07:37, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

:When anyone is able to add a quote at their leisure, we will naturally end up with plenty of quotes that aren't funny. If anyone is able to remove a quote at their leisure, quotes that aren't funny will disappear. This is parallel to the wikipedia editing process in general, and I think this kind of process has decent results. Although I am open to other proposals.
:On the topic of racy jokes: I'm sure there are plenty of group-targeted jokes that could be stated in DF terms that would be very funny; just pick a group, a metaphor, and a stereotype. But even if you tell a member of that group to grow a thicker skin or to stop taking themselves seriously or learn to take a joke, it doesn't turn the joke from something alienating to something entertaining. In the right context, those kinds of jokes can be very funny even to those on the butt end of them. Standup comedians succeed or fail based on their ability to create it. But I don't think that the front page is the right context. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 10:24, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

::Unless its blantantly offensive I don't think "unfunny" is a reason to remove a quote, we each have our own sense of humour, such debate should be placed here on the discussion page imo. --[[User:Markavian|Markavian]] 20:30, 25 May 2008 (EDT)

:::Bleh. I'd like to, but nobody answers most discussion page debates in reasonable time. If we become more regularly active in discussion page debates (which isn't hard - we've got several that any experienced player can add to), we might be able to do that. As it is, the responses are usually at least a few days, often months apart. And then, occasionally, we get one that has five people with fifteen comments in a day or two. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 23:45, 31 May 2008 (EDT)

As I've said before, if you want to revert those of my deletes that you really think should stay, that's fine. The way I see it, and the way some have said before me, anybody can, if they think it's funny enough, add a quote to the page. Of course, we will get some pretty poor quotes that way, so anyone can, if they dislike it enough, delete a quote from that page. If an edit war occurs, we can take it to the talk page (with the war attention, we'll actually have commenters), where it can be resolved. We Are Not Wikipedia. We're too small for that; everyone knows everyone else and anyone can monitor all edits if they have a little time to spend. 
--[[User:Savok|Savok]], rambling at 23:45, 31 May 2008 (EDT)

== [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=19686.msg206978#msg206978 Too untasteful?] ==

I found this on the forums:
<div style="width: 12em; padding: 0.5em; margin-bottom: 1em; border: 1px solid #ccc; background: #eee; text-align: center">''Belbezevost Närangagak Äkig:'' 
Goatsects the Raw Red Anus of Stretching</div>
For? Against? --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 22:56, 24 June 2008 (EDT)

I'm for it. DF has people exploding in gore. Besides, these words are in the game anyway.
-- [[User:InquisitorSaturn|InquisitorSaturn]] 01:44, 3 July 2008 (EDT)

I'm for it. Lets be honest; how many people are likely to come to this wiki that aren't mature enough to enjoy a little mature humor. If anything people are more likely to complain that it didn't make them laugh then that they are worried that kids might see it. --[[User:Silver|Silver]] 01:29, 23 July 2008 (EDT)

:Nobody gives a fuck about the kids, man. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 22:32, 29 October 2008 (EDT)

For - Very funny and clever --[[User:Cultiststeve|cultiststeve]] 17:33, 15 January 2009 (EST)

Against. I think it might be funny once or twice, but it is not necessarily something that I want to see on the front page for hours until the quote changes again. --[[User:i2amroy|i2amroy]] 10:26 June 14 (MST)

:Mmmm... against. When there were 2 quotes on the page, maybe. But now that there's only 1, I'd rather not have this be "representative" of any DF experience, when it's simply not. In fact, it has nothing to do with DF - it's just crude. (Not that that's a bad thing - it just has nothing to do with DF.) --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 19:41, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

== Multi-Line Quotes ==

I assumed your multi-line quote was an error because it rendered incorrectly when it appeared on http://www.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Main_Page/Quote , and did so again when you restored the original. I've re-re-restored it in the interests of peace but I do note that the text extends outside the box and one line actually appears below the box. I'm less certain whether it appears this way on the main page. Perhaps we need a different way to enter multi-line quotes? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:39, 31 October 2008 (EDT)

:The quote that's causing problems is kinda long, either way. How about we just bonk it on the head?--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 19:15, 31 October 2008 (EDT)
::But it's funny. :( --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 01:55, 1 November 2008 (EDT)

:Just out of curiosity, what browser? It appears just fine in Firefox 2. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 17:39, 4 November 2008 (EST)
::Firefox 3. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:19, 11 November 2008 (EST)

:My multi-line quote (shown below) doesn't appear to break anything (browser used: Firefox 3). --[[User:Beerdude26|Beerdude26]] 15:26, 22 January 2009 (EST)

<blockquote>
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?"

'''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
</blockquote>

== Okay wtf who broke shit where. ==

On the main page, the second random quote is just a '. WHAT GIVES? --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 14:32, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:I can't find any recent changes to the code of the selector, and given that the first selector works, it's hard to blame a syntax error either. The mainpage does a weird thing to guarantee the quotes are different, passing |1 to the page as a parameter or...something. Someone who knows wikicode may know what's going on. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:13, 20 November 2008 (EST)

::The problem is a bit deeper. [[template:rand]] and [[template:rand2]] use the mod function inside a #expr to mod the current timestamp and return a number in a specified range. The mod function is returning negative values for large inputs (this is a bug). Since it seems I can't guarantee a positive number will have a positive mod, I don't know how to modify the templates to make sure they keep returning positive numbers. Smaller inputs would be nice, but I need it to vary with time, and those are the ones that are blowing it up. Also, I don't have absolute value or any binary number operations, so those methods are out. Absolute value would be available with a newer version of parser functions, but convincing [[user:senso|Senso]] is an obstacle there. I'm really not sure how to remedy this. Anyone have ideas? [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 19:43, 20 November 2008 (EST)

::: I say divide the end result before modulusing by 4. That'll still give pseudo-random numbers, just less often, and might work until a better fix rears its not-so-ugly head. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:12, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::: <s>Good idea. I'll try it. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:21, 20 November 2008 (EST)</s>
:::: Didn't work. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:23, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:::: Feel free to fool around with [[template:rand]] and push a fix if you can find one. Just make sure to preview. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:24, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::::Ah well, it was worth a shot. I'll see what I can come up with in the [[Template:Sandbox|sandbox]]. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:31, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:::::<s>UPDATE: It appears using <tt><nowiki>{{#expr: ((({{LOCALTIMESTAMP}} / 1024) + {{CURRENTDAY}} + {{CURRENTMONTH}}) mod {{{1|100}}}) + 1}}</nowiki></tt> seems to produce positive numbers for now. I'll go update [[Template:Rand2]] and see if it works.</s> <s>So much for that, but at least it was returning positive numbers. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:42, 20 November 2008 (EST)</s>
:::::Okay, I blame certain things being slow for the fact that it works over in the Sandbox but not in the Main Page/Quote template. :S But the good news is, it's at least producing a result over at the sandbox. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:54, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::Can you use an <nowiki> {{ #ifexpr: {{{num}}} >= 0 | {{{num}}} | {{ #expr: {{{num}}} * -1 }} }} </nowiki> to replace abs? (I may have the syntax slightly wrong.)--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 04:09, 21 November 2008 (EST)

::::Good call, Maximus. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 09:04, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:::::You know, I thought of that just last night but was too busy falling asleep. :( --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 15:21, 21 November 2008 (EST)

::::::I stole it off your desk.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 18:06, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:Here we go again! It's started displaying the telltale ' again. D: --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 00:05, 27 November 2008 (EST) UPDATE: It's just gone away again. Might be worth a try to check the conditions next time it does it D: --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 00:08, 27 November 2008 (EST)

::Should be fixed now. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 18:04, 6 December 2008 (EST)

== What's This Jreengus Stuff About, Anyway? ==

Googling it just gets me pages telling me it's funny for those in the know somehow. If any place ought to have an explanation it's the wiki. That's what it's there for! :) --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 13:05, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:Kobolds speak gibberish. The code that named an event allowed the kobolds to name it (when they won? maybe.), and that caused the name of an event to sometimes be a single word of gibberish. Toady mentioned that somewhere in some part of the dev notes.
:That's it. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 17:17, 21 November 2008 (EST)

== Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal. ==

Haaaaawhaaahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa. Awesome. We need more quotes that are as funny as this. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 17:48, 25 November 2008 (EST)
:How many people can understand dwarven without dictionary? :) Anyway, the quote is still funny as is. [[User:Kurokikaze|Kurokikaze]] 12:13, 14 October 2009 (UTC)

== Long quotes ==

"Engraved on the wall is a masterfully designed image of a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving on a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving on a wall. The engraving is a dwarf mining out a wall." Yes this is a long quote but it's also funny, why ditch it? I didn't see any long quotes breaking the mainpage the way multi-line quotes did. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:59, 12 December 2008 (EST)

:They make the main page look like crap by stretching the quote box and pushing down everything else. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:31, 12 December 2008 (EST)
:Surely there are other places to put funny things. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:33, 12 December 2008 (EST)

::Not really, unless you mean 'keep this stuff off the wiki'. No, quotes aren't a big deal. They're just fun, i.e. 'the entire point'. ;p The Quote_Archive is an obvious aging relic, and ought to go anyway since there's no sense having multiple, separate pages of slightly different functionality and identical content patchily duplicating each other. I wonder if the quote wikicode could be done the other way around... I might play around on my talk page and see if I can build a useful something. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 17:33, 12 December 2008 (EST)

:::The Quote Archive was originally created as a place for quotes to go to never be deleted, so that it wouldn't be that bad if someone lost a quote from Main Page/Quote. When I created it, I didn't realize the effort it would take to update it, so I'm going to go over there now and clean it up, making it all plaintext.
:::Also, I concur with Vengeful that the long quotes are overly ugly on the main page. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 22:35, 12 December 2008 (EST)
::::Not arguing with that. I usually run screens at a high resolution so I didn't notice the stretching myself. I do think multiple quote pages is pointless though, 'specially considering folk like me will happen upon them and helpfully transfer stuff from one to the other... Not that I would, but I had often considered doing so, obviously misunderstanding your intent in all that duplicate information. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 00:15, 13 December 2008 (EST)

:I agree in principle - many recently deleted are not (imo) a dealbreaker, but there has to be a limit somewhere. I just posted a guideline at the top of the page which reads:
::LIMIT QUOTES TO 150 CHARACTERS (as most are below)
::LONGER QUOTES MAY BE SNIPPED OR DELETED!
:- which seems the max currently. (Only visible when editing, allcaps for max visibility/impact.)
:I also edited several existing long quotes into shorter, acceptable format - some of those were funny, and while changing others' quotes is not my preferred option, this is a wiki, and it's that or lose them.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 04:05, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

== Edit Warring ==
I see GreyMario has taken it upon himself to remove quotes by the dozen, most of which had previously been added back after someone noticed their mysterious absence. Clearly your sense of humor is not everyone's or people wouldn't have to keep adding them back, could you just leave it be instead of editwarring? Can someone give us a revert, please? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 23:24, 4 January 2009 (EST)

:Except they were removed because they were unfunny by popular vote. People should really put it up to a vote when it comes to adding them back. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 01:24, 5 January 2009 (EST)

::I must have missed this, where did it happen? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 14:21, 5 January 2009 (EST)

:::In general, I think the replacement of deleted quotes is more of a problem than their deletion. As long as they are added just once and deleted just once, we won't have an edit war even with conflicting views of humor. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 09:28, 11 January 2009 (EST)

I agree, most of those votes were not funny. They were not even remotely close to my "mind like a +whatever trap+" quote, and it's hard to be worse than that and still funny. Anyway, edit warring=no, people should ask what happened to them and it then should be explained exactly what did happen. Personally, I think that they should be left on the quote archive, but not popping up on the main page for all to see.--[[User:Destor|Destor]] 12:12, 5 January 2009 (EST)

== 6 deleted quotes - call for opinions ==

Here are 6 quotes that were deleted after being added. I believe they are worth keeping - wouldn't have added them if I didn't, but one other user disagreed enough to delete them all. Opinions on any or all are requested.

:*Look, there's sentient lava outside, & the only survivor is issuing mandates to the empty halls. This isn't going to get better.
::Goddamn I am ''sick'' of this constant editwarring. If I went around removing everything I didn't think was funny the quotes page would be cut in half, but I try to respect other people's content and acknowlege other people's sense of humor. This was not a misquote originally, someone just shortened it into one, and butchered both the content and the english language in the process. "There's sentient lava outside" is perilously close to lolspeak. "There are roving clumps of sentient lava outside", on the other hand, is a mental picture that gets a laugh reaction from 4/5 folks I show it to. I'm putting it back. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 20:36, 30 June 2009 (UTC)
:::Vengeful donut took this to my talk page for some reason, I'm responding here. Humor is a matter of taste, unlike most of the rest of the wiki, and one person shouldn't try and define it for everyone. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 23:44, 1 July 2009 (UTC)

:*On the forums is a masterful rendition of an image of a human reading a dwarf fortress wiki. The human has '''no clue''' what is going on.

:*Seeing a dwarf give birth while sparring was scary, but worse was when she picked the child up & continued fighting.

:*The merchants won't leave because I killed their guys & I can't drown them because there's a shoe in the floodgate.

:*All I do is lure the gobbos in and throw the lever to flood the central chamber, & the goblins start sorting themselves by density.

:*The mayor sent me to kill the crocodile that killed my last 3 characters - again... I think he's catching on that I want to kill him.
--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 06:49, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

::It's worth noting that these are all misquotes. They have been modified from their original versions. Since these is a list of '''quotes''' rather than just '''jokes''' misquotes do not belong here. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 07:57, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:::IMO, we don't even credit the quotes so it's not ''that'' important to keep the original phrase intact. The quotes are here to add a funny aspect to the front page, it's not like we're quoting the President about some Important Matter. If a quote breaks the box, I say it's fine to shorten it until it fits, as long as the original spirit is kept. We could always ask the quote's author for their approval, if it's that important. Can we track the origin of those quotes? If not, let's edit them since nobody can prove they're actual quotes anyway. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 13:52, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

::::If we're not going to pretend that we're quoting people, perhaps we should rename the page. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:16, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:::::A bunch of sentences without any credits are not proper quotes so in fact, the Quotes page has never really been about quoting people, it's seen as a repository of funny quips about DF. Personally, I don't think it's important enough to start finding all the real authors and adding the authors to the quotes when they appear on the front page. We're not going to bicker about the definition of the word "Quote" and if it's a valid designation or not for that page, I'll leave that kind of debate for Wikipedia. Also, I wouldn't be surprised if most of the "quotes" were made up for that list anyway. My final opinion is this: The more sentences we have in that list the better, I don't mind if there is no source attribution. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 00:19, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

::I like quote 2 (forum + wiki) so much that I'ld be willing to re-add it myself; don't care about the rest. --[[User:MathFox|MathFox]] 15:43, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:'''Restore''' And I'll also echo Senso's sentiments on the matter. -[[User:N9103|Edward]]

== Signatures ==

Do we want to include signatures? ("Toady" and a few other notables being exceptions). Isn't that a bit against the anonymous/collective idea of a wiki? Doesn't that personalize the edits and hurt the overall process? (And risk turning this into a "look at me!" page?)--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 21:02, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

:That sounds like a fine idea, if someone sees a quote with somebody's sinature, they can just delete the signature. --[[User:Frandude|Frandude]] 18:54, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

== Redirects in Quotes ==

Do you guys really think we should have [[]]'s in quotes? They mights help a bit, but it seems to take away a bit of the vibe. Thoughts about taking them down?
:I think the links are appropriate for drawing in and directing new users. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 17:47, 10 October 2009 (UTC)

== Inappropriate Undo ==

While you are free to re-add a removed quote, removal is a call to review those quotes which were removed. Undo is a blatant violation of that, as it doesn't necessitate even *looking* at what was removed. As such, I am undoing the undo, and ask that if the person wishes to re-add any of the quotes that he deliberately re-add the ones he actually thinks are funny. (Do note I moved a couple around because it was easier instead of de-incrementing numbers). Also, re-adding necessitates a discussion on this page - please have one before re-adding. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 20:09, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
: I want them back, 4 of the 5 were funny as they were, and there's no need to trim them since they doesnt break the page layout. Actually, I find your undo of the undo annoying, since they were fine quotes. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 20:48, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
::I deleted more than 5... =P And I moved some because it was easier than changing numbers. Which ones did you think were funny - I mean, we can have the discussion, but we need to have a discussion before they get re-added. (Also, the carp one is totally funnier with just the game quote) --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 23:50, 16 October 2009 (UTC)

== Seriously, Guys ==

I forget DF for a few months and you remove almost an entire kilobyte of quotes, along with the stupid goatse one which, while awful, was long since victorious in the protracted and bitter war over whether it should stay and in what form. Yes, it's quite clear you don't like some quotes. Yes, anyone is allowed to remove quotes but it's almost always the same very few people that do so, and the rules are clearly designed in your favor(delete anything you want with no justification, but add things only once unless you can change the deleter's mind). Would it kill you to at least '''add''' a little content to this page alongside removing so much? If I decided the main page was ugly and REMOVED IT wouldn't that still be a loss of content? Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:51, 25 October 2009 (UTC)

::Corona688, you have argued that the current system for deleting and undeleting quotes is bad. You have asked people who have removed quotes to be constructive instead. Let's turn this request around: when it comes to the issue of quote policy, please be constructive instead. I am sure you will be hard pressed to find anyone who disagrees with your complaints about the current system. They are all valid. However, despite these shortcomings, nobody has come up with a better one. If we decided the current policy was bad and just removed it without replacement, we would be worse off. "''Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave?''". [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

:I didn't remove the goatsects one, and while i didn't find it funny, i did respect the consensus of the talk page regarding it. The one quote i did add was removed in like a month.
:However, removing stuff from this page is as important as adding stuff - both types of people are needed to ensure a quality page. Otherwise we end up either with lots of crappy quotes or very few quotes. So don't disparage one side of the equation - both are essential. That said, expecting the people adding things to be funnier wouldn't be too much to expect, would it? There's still a lot of not funny in the quote list, and a few that could be funny with a little editing. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 00:41, 26 October 2009 (UTC)
::Yes, we need both. Not many folks would bother adding quotes more than once as is though, so we're seeing a net loss of content. I don't think the primary deleters here represent the One And Only True Correct Sense Of Humor™®ⓒ, and the rules as is unfairly pit content creators against them. Almost nobody cares one way or another except about their own quotes, you can't expect a consensus to readd when a good one is deleted. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 16:57, 27 October 2009 (UTC)

:::We are not experiencing a net loss of content. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

== Ok, that's enough ==

Squirrelloid, you have your own humor, but don't try to impose it on other people. If you don't find something funny doesn't mean you have to remove it.

You removed these 3 lines with your last edit :
* had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
* Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
* Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.

The last one is taken from an epic forum topic, the second one is funny because of the focus the dwarf have on olivine. The first one is from the dev log...

By the way, where is it written than quote MUST be funny ? --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:27, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::Re: Readding quotes
::One person is hardly consensus. Page policy:
:::"If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion."
:::"If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added."
::I certainly don't feel you've met the burden of that, and I certainly don't find those quotes funny.
::--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:26, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::: Make it two, with corona, there's no definite number of people needed AFAIK --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:35, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::::Corona doesn't come down in favor of any particular quotes actually, nor did he contribute to the relevant discussion. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:40, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::Also, you can't just go re-instating an old version if there's multiple subsequent versions. You actually deleted new material.
::On those specific quotes. The Dev log quote sucks. The delivery is awful. There may be a good line with the same base material, but that is certainly not it.
::The second one is clearly not in-game, because its impossible to generate that, which severely detracts from its humor value.
::And I don't care how epic the thread was, the quote isn't at all interesting.
::--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:31, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

Well, YOUR modification were not funny. So I removed them. If you want them back, you have to do a call for opinion :) --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:35, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::Which, my new quote or my modification of the carp one? If you want to *remove* either, by all means, its your right. But to re-add the old material requires consensus on each and every individual quote, not just reverting. Its a violation of page policy. So stop. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:40, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

== Request for opinion - Deleted quote ==

Since we have someone not funny at all who try to impose is humor, or lack of, on us, and since the guideline are there, even if they are not really clear or useful as stated by corona866... Here's a request for opinion on deleted quote.

Here's the list, just add under it if you want them back, or not. That way, no one is going to cry. In 2 weeks, enough time for the regular contributor to see this topic, we could add them back or not. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

=== I had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09 ===
Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
==="So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??" --alway ===
Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
=== Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine. ===
Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
=== Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones. ===
Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
=== If I ''remembered'' what the &%^#*@! lever did, I'd ''pull'' it! <...pulls lever anyway...> ===
Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
=== <nowiki>::facepalm::</nowiki> Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago. ===
Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)
=== Game Features: How much you ''want''? System Requirements: How much you ''got''? ===
Want it back --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:53, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T15:44:13Z

Karl: Removed an unfunny quote. :)

{{Choose|c={{rand|77}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|The carp has drowned.
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.

}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T15:36:20Z

Karl: Undo revision 56514 by Squirrelloid (Talk) Could not care less, your addition is not funny.

{{Choose|c={{rand|84}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|I had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|"So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??" --alway
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
|The carp has drowned.
|Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|If I ''remembered'' what the &%^#*@! lever did, I'd ''pull'' it! <...pulls lever anyway...>
|<nowiki>::facepalm::</nowiki> Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago.
|Game Features: How much you ''want''? System Requirements: How much you ''got''?
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

Talk:Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T15:35:34Z

Karl: /* Ok, that's enough */

== How to add quotes: ==

* Go to the line of the last quote.
* Add a line immediately after it (this should be before the closing }} brackets)
* type "|YOUR-QUOTE-HERE" on that line
:(The quote number is not functionally necessary, but it allows keeping track of how many quotes there are without counting)
* Look at the first line of the template
:It should look something like this:
<pre>{{Choose|c={{rand|37}}</pre>
*Adjust the number that is in the place of the 37 to reflect the number of quotes in the list.
*Preview your reply to make sure nothing is broken (or someone will be able to see it on the main page before it gets fixed)
*Profit!
[[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:34, 27 February 2008 (EST)

== When to add quotes: ==

So. We have a small problem here. People add quotes, people remove quotes, people un-remove quotes, and people make edit war. Suggestion: 
:Rough guidelines for [[Main Page/Quote]]:
:*New quotes are freely added.
:*Those quotes are freely removed.
:*If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion.
:*If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added.
:*If <user2> wants to get quotes re-removed once the previous consensus is old, <user2> can make a similar section.
:*Etcetera.
--[[User:Savok|Savok]] 18:24, 7 March 2009 (EST)
::I approve. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 18:53, 7 March 2009 (EST)
__TOC__

== Screenshots ==
The [http://www.dfwk.ru/index.php/%D0%97%D0%B0%D0%B3%D0%BB%D0%B0%D0%B2%D0%BD%D0%B0%D1%8F_%D1%81%D1%82%D1%80%D0%B0%D0%BD%D0%B8%D1%86%D0%B0 russian wiki] has made use of the system here to show random DF screenshots rather than quotes. I think this is a rather clever idea. Maybe we have a good spot where we could place something similar? [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 14:59, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

: Neat Idea. We could have one quote and one screenshoot. But we should define a standard size for the screenshot. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:36, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

::200x150 would make it fit the 800x600 curses, with proportional distortion all around, without taking up much in the way of page real estate. If the real estate is deemed not quite so valuable, then 400x300 would work even better, suffering half the overall distortion (but still maintaining a relatively small footprint, and keeping aspect ratio intact.) Unless we're happy with the smaller size I suggested, a page overhaul is going to be needed to find a place to put it, such that it doesn't make a jumble out of the rest of it. (Conversely, I think the 200x150 would fit very neatly in the space already allotted to one of the quotes.) --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 21:58, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

:Also, it could easily be arranged so that quotes and screenshots are paired. That way each screenshot has an accompanying caption. It would take quite a bit of work to get images for the current ones, though. I guess we could start them off as random stuff and switch them out as we go. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 02:40, 21 April 2009 (UTC)

:: How does one add screenshots? -- [[User:RomeoFalling|RomeoFalling]] 06:53, 7 October 2009 (UTC)
:::Which part don't you get? Saving screenshot, uploading image, adding it to the main page?
:::Assuming you mean the last bit - see [[Template talk:Sg]] - there should be some better form of documentation for [[Main page]] shouldn't there![[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 09:52, 7 October 2009 (UTC)

== "[B]loats" ==

For what it's worth, the nowiki formatting around square bracketed 'B' in the Toady quote about boats was simply in the interests of quoting accuracy; the original word was not capitalized and I still have that kind of formatting in my heart from college paper citations. --[[User:Alfador|Alfador]] 12:16, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

:Ah. It looked to me like a weird, failed boats/bloats pun. I don't think it really matters; you can change it back if you like. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 17:19, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

::Thank you! And done. --[[User:Alfador|Alfador]] 11:27, 25 March 2008 (EDT)

== Quote removal ==

Say, why was the "interrupted by carp" quote removed? I loved that one. --[[User:JT|JT]] 02:58, 13 April 2008 (EDT)

:Blame Savok, he thought it was unfunny. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMario]] 16:22, 24 April 2008 (EDT)

And regarding VengefulDonut stripping off that last one, PTTG's quote was simply hilarious. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? --[[User:JT|JT]] 02:19, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

Thinking on this some more, the idea that anyone can just reverse a quote at their leisure strikes me as unusual. If a quote is an obvious spam, that's one thing; if a quote is something that ''you'' don't think of as funny, I think there should be some sort of consensus system involved. There are at least a couple existing quotes that I don't find funny in the slightest (Spiders Everywhere, you've been processed, GreyMario's), but I don't remove them. --[[User:JT|JT]]

My 2☼ on the subject: 
Unless a quote is offensively directed at a particular user/person, I don't see how there are any grounds for removal. 
If it is, it's perfectly acceptable for the addressed person to remove it, if they so choose. 
Additionally, you may remove quotes of yourself, whether or not they're offensive, regardless of who added the quote. 
In all cases, it's the sole responsibility of the addressed person to remove a quote, not someone else. 
I think that makes sense.. but perhaps I'm too far off base? --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 07:37, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

:When anyone is able to add a quote at their leisure, we will naturally end up with plenty of quotes that aren't funny. If anyone is able to remove a quote at their leisure, quotes that aren't funny will disappear. This is parallel to the wikipedia editing process in general, and I think this kind of process has decent results. Although I am open to other proposals.
:On the topic of racy jokes: I'm sure there are plenty of group-targeted jokes that could be stated in DF terms that would be very funny; just pick a group, a metaphor, and a stereotype. But even if you tell a member of that group to grow a thicker skin or to stop taking themselves seriously or learn to take a joke, it doesn't turn the joke from something alienating to something entertaining. In the right context, those kinds of jokes can be very funny even to those on the butt end of them. Standup comedians succeed or fail based on their ability to create it. But I don't think that the front page is the right context. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 10:24, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

::Unless its blantantly offensive I don't think "unfunny" is a reason to remove a quote, we each have our own sense of humour, such debate should be placed here on the discussion page imo. --[[User:Markavian|Markavian]] 20:30, 25 May 2008 (EDT)

:::Bleh. I'd like to, but nobody answers most discussion page debates in reasonable time. If we become more regularly active in discussion page debates (which isn't hard - we've got several that any experienced player can add to), we might be able to do that. As it is, the responses are usually at least a few days, often months apart. And then, occasionally, we get one that has five people with fifteen comments in a day or two. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 23:45, 31 May 2008 (EDT)

As I've said before, if you want to revert those of my deletes that you really think should stay, that's fine. The way I see it, and the way some have said before me, anybody can, if they think it's funny enough, add a quote to the page. Of course, we will get some pretty poor quotes that way, so anyone can, if they dislike it enough, delete a quote from that page. If an edit war occurs, we can take it to the talk page (with the war attention, we'll actually have commenters), where it can be resolved. We Are Not Wikipedia. We're too small for that; everyone knows everyone else and anyone can monitor all edits if they have a little time to spend. 
--[[User:Savok|Savok]], rambling at 23:45, 31 May 2008 (EDT)

== [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=19686.msg206978#msg206978 Too untasteful?] ==

I found this on the forums:
<div style="width: 12em; padding: 0.5em; margin-bottom: 1em; border: 1px solid #ccc; background: #eee; text-align: center">''Belbezevost Närangagak Äkig:'' 
Goatsects the Raw Red Anus of Stretching</div>
For? Against? --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 22:56, 24 June 2008 (EDT)

I'm for it. DF has people exploding in gore. Besides, these words are in the game anyway.
-- [[User:InquisitorSaturn|InquisitorSaturn]] 01:44, 3 July 2008 (EDT)

I'm for it. Lets be honest; how many people are likely to come to this wiki that aren't mature enough to enjoy a little mature humor. If anything people are more likely to complain that it didn't make them laugh then that they are worried that kids might see it. --[[User:Silver|Silver]] 01:29, 23 July 2008 (EDT)

:Nobody gives a fuck about the kids, man. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 22:32, 29 October 2008 (EDT)

For - Very funny and clever --[[User:Cultiststeve|cultiststeve]] 17:33, 15 January 2009 (EST)

Against. I think it might be funny once or twice, but it is not necessarily something that I want to see on the front page for hours until the quote changes again. --[[User:i2amroy|i2amroy]] 10:26 June 14 (MST)

:Mmmm... against. When there were 2 quotes on the page, maybe. But now that there's only 1, I'd rather not have this be "representative" of any DF experience, when it's simply not. In fact, it has nothing to do with DF - it's just crude. (Not that that's a bad thing - it just has nothing to do with DF.) --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 19:41, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

== Multi-Line Quotes ==

I assumed your multi-line quote was an error because it rendered incorrectly when it appeared on http://www.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Main_Page/Quote , and did so again when you restored the original. I've re-re-restored it in the interests of peace but I do note that the text extends outside the box and one line actually appears below the box. I'm less certain whether it appears this way on the main page. Perhaps we need a different way to enter multi-line quotes? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:39, 31 October 2008 (EDT)

:The quote that's causing problems is kinda long, either way. How about we just bonk it on the head?--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 19:15, 31 October 2008 (EDT)
::But it's funny. :( --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 01:55, 1 November 2008 (EDT)

:Just out of curiosity, what browser? It appears just fine in Firefox 2. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 17:39, 4 November 2008 (EST)
::Firefox 3. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:19, 11 November 2008 (EST)

:My multi-line quote (shown below) doesn't appear to break anything (browser used: Firefox 3). --[[User:Beerdude26|Beerdude26]] 15:26, 22 January 2009 (EST)

<blockquote>
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?"

'''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
</blockquote>

== Okay wtf who broke shit where. ==

On the main page, the second random quote is just a '. WHAT GIVES? --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 14:32, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:I can't find any recent changes to the code of the selector, and given that the first selector works, it's hard to blame a syntax error either. The mainpage does a weird thing to guarantee the quotes are different, passing |1 to the page as a parameter or...something. Someone who knows wikicode may know what's going on. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:13, 20 November 2008 (EST)

::The problem is a bit deeper. [[template:rand]] and [[template:rand2]] use the mod function inside a #expr to mod the current timestamp and return a number in a specified range. The mod function is returning negative values for large inputs (this is a bug). Since it seems I can't guarantee a positive number will have a positive mod, I don't know how to modify the templates to make sure they keep returning positive numbers. Smaller inputs would be nice, but I need it to vary with time, and those are the ones that are blowing it up. Also, I don't have absolute value or any binary number operations, so those methods are out. Absolute value would be available with a newer version of parser functions, but convincing [[user:senso|Senso]] is an obstacle there. I'm really not sure how to remedy this. Anyone have ideas? [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 19:43, 20 November 2008 (EST)

::: I say divide the end result before modulusing by 4. That'll still give pseudo-random numbers, just less often, and might work until a better fix rears its not-so-ugly head. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:12, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::: <s>Good idea. I'll try it. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:21, 20 November 2008 (EST)</s>
:::: Didn't work. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:23, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:::: Feel free to fool around with [[template:rand]] and push a fix if you can find one. Just make sure to preview. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:24, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::::Ah well, it was worth a shot. I'll see what I can come up with in the [[Template:Sandbox|sandbox]]. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:31, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:::::<s>UPDATE: It appears using <tt><nowiki>{{#expr: ((({{LOCALTIMESTAMP}} / 1024) + {{CURRENTDAY}} + {{CURRENTMONTH}}) mod {{{1|100}}}) + 1}}</nowiki></tt> seems to produce positive numbers for now. I'll go update [[Template:Rand2]] and see if it works.</s> <s>So much for that, but at least it was returning positive numbers. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:42, 20 November 2008 (EST)</s>
:::::Okay, I blame certain things being slow for the fact that it works over in the Sandbox but not in the Main Page/Quote template. :S But the good news is, it's at least producing a result over at the sandbox. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:54, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::Can you use an <nowiki> {{ #ifexpr: {{{num}}} >= 0 | {{{num}}} | {{ #expr: {{{num}}} * -1 }} }} </nowiki> to replace abs? (I may have the syntax slightly wrong.)--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 04:09, 21 November 2008 (EST)

::::Good call, Maximus. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 09:04, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:::::You know, I thought of that just last night but was too busy falling asleep. :( --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 15:21, 21 November 2008 (EST)

::::::I stole it off your desk.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 18:06, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:Here we go again! It's started displaying the telltale ' again. D: --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 00:05, 27 November 2008 (EST) UPDATE: It's just gone away again. Might be worth a try to check the conditions next time it does it D: --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 00:08, 27 November 2008 (EST)

::Should be fixed now. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 18:04, 6 December 2008 (EST)

== What's This Jreengus Stuff About, Anyway? ==

Googling it just gets me pages telling me it's funny for those in the know somehow. If any place ought to have an explanation it's the wiki. That's what it's there for! :) --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 13:05, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:Kobolds speak gibberish. The code that named an event allowed the kobolds to name it (when they won? maybe.), and that caused the name of an event to sometimes be a single word of gibberish. Toady mentioned that somewhere in some part of the dev notes.
:That's it. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 17:17, 21 November 2008 (EST)

== Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal. ==

Haaaaawhaaahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa. Awesome. We need more quotes that are as funny as this. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 17:48, 25 November 2008 (EST)
:How many people can understand dwarven without dictionary? :) Anyway, the quote is still funny as is. [[User:Kurokikaze|Kurokikaze]] 12:13, 14 October 2009 (UTC)

== Long quotes ==

"Engraved on the wall is a masterfully designed image of a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving on a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving on a wall. The engraving is a dwarf mining out a wall." Yes this is a long quote but it's also funny, why ditch it? I didn't see any long quotes breaking the mainpage the way multi-line quotes did. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:59, 12 December 2008 (EST)

:They make the main page look like crap by stretching the quote box and pushing down everything else. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:31, 12 December 2008 (EST)
:Surely there are other places to put funny things. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:33, 12 December 2008 (EST)

::Not really, unless you mean 'keep this stuff off the wiki'. No, quotes aren't a big deal. They're just fun, i.e. 'the entire point'. ;p The Quote_Archive is an obvious aging relic, and ought to go anyway since there's no sense having multiple, separate pages of slightly different functionality and identical content patchily duplicating each other. I wonder if the quote wikicode could be done the other way around... I might play around on my talk page and see if I can build a useful something. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 17:33, 12 December 2008 (EST)

:::The Quote Archive was originally created as a place for quotes to go to never be deleted, so that it wouldn't be that bad if someone lost a quote from Main Page/Quote. When I created it, I didn't realize the effort it would take to update it, so I'm going to go over there now and clean it up, making it all plaintext.
:::Also, I concur with Vengeful that the long quotes are overly ugly on the main page. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 22:35, 12 December 2008 (EST)
::::Not arguing with that. I usually run screens at a high resolution so I didn't notice the stretching myself. I do think multiple quote pages is pointless though, 'specially considering folk like me will happen upon them and helpfully transfer stuff from one to the other... Not that I would, but I had often considered doing so, obviously misunderstanding your intent in all that duplicate information. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 00:15, 13 December 2008 (EST)

:I agree in principle - many recently deleted are not (imo) a dealbreaker, but there has to be a limit somewhere. I just posted a guideline at the top of the page which reads:
::LIMIT QUOTES TO 150 CHARACTERS (as most are below)
::LONGER QUOTES MAY BE SNIPPED OR DELETED!
:- which seems the max currently. (Only visible when editing, allcaps for max visibility/impact.)
:I also edited several existing long quotes into shorter, acceptable format - some of those were funny, and while changing others' quotes is not my preferred option, this is a wiki, and it's that or lose them.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 04:05, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

== Edit Warring ==
I see GreyMario has taken it upon himself to remove quotes by the dozen, most of which had previously been added back after someone noticed their mysterious absence. Clearly your sense of humor is not everyone's or people wouldn't have to keep adding them back, could you just leave it be instead of editwarring? Can someone give us a revert, please? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 23:24, 4 January 2009 (EST)

:Except they were removed because they were unfunny by popular vote. People should really put it up to a vote when it comes to adding them back. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 01:24, 5 January 2009 (EST)

::I must have missed this, where did it happen? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 14:21, 5 January 2009 (EST)

:::In general, I think the replacement of deleted quotes is more of a problem than their deletion. As long as they are added just once and deleted just once, we won't have an edit war even with conflicting views of humor. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 09:28, 11 January 2009 (EST)

I agree, most of those votes were not funny. They were not even remotely close to my "mind like a +whatever trap+" quote, and it's hard to be worse than that and still funny. Anyway, edit warring=no, people should ask what happened to them and it then should be explained exactly what did happen. Personally, I think that they should be left on the quote archive, but not popping up on the main page for all to see.--[[User:Destor|Destor]] 12:12, 5 January 2009 (EST)

== 6 deleted quotes - call for opinions ==

Here are 6 quotes that were deleted after being added. I believe they are worth keeping - wouldn't have added them if I didn't, but one other user disagreed enough to delete them all. Opinions on any or all are requested.

:*Look, there's sentient lava outside, & the only survivor is issuing mandates to the empty halls. This isn't going to get better.
::Goddamn I am ''sick'' of this constant editwarring. If I went around removing everything I didn't think was funny the quotes page would be cut in half, but I try to respect other people's content and acknowlege other people's sense of humor. This was not a misquote originally, someone just shortened it into one, and butchered both the content and the english language in the process. "There's sentient lava outside" is perilously close to lolspeak. "There are roving clumps of sentient lava outside", on the other hand, is a mental picture that gets a laugh reaction from 4/5 folks I show it to. I'm putting it back. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 20:36, 30 June 2009 (UTC)
:::Vengeful donut took this to my talk page for some reason, I'm responding here. Humor is a matter of taste, unlike most of the rest of the wiki, and one person shouldn't try and define it for everyone. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 23:44, 1 July 2009 (UTC)

:*On the forums is a masterful rendition of an image of a human reading a dwarf fortress wiki. The human has '''no clue''' what is going on.

:*Seeing a dwarf give birth while sparring was scary, but worse was when she picked the child up & continued fighting.

:*The merchants won't leave because I killed their guys & I can't drown them because there's a shoe in the floodgate.

:*All I do is lure the gobbos in and throw the lever to flood the central chamber, & the goblins start sorting themselves by density.

:*The mayor sent me to kill the crocodile that killed my last 3 characters - again... I think he's catching on that I want to kill him.
--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 06:49, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

::It's worth noting that these are all misquotes. They have been modified from their original versions. Since these is a list of '''quotes''' rather than just '''jokes''' misquotes do not belong here. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 07:57, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:::IMO, we don't even credit the quotes so it's not ''that'' important to keep the original phrase intact. The quotes are here to add a funny aspect to the front page, it's not like we're quoting the President about some Important Matter. If a quote breaks the box, I say it's fine to shorten it until it fits, as long as the original spirit is kept. We could always ask the quote's author for their approval, if it's that important. Can we track the origin of those quotes? If not, let's edit them since nobody can prove they're actual quotes anyway. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 13:52, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

::::If we're not going to pretend that we're quoting people, perhaps we should rename the page. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:16, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:::::A bunch of sentences without any credits are not proper quotes so in fact, the Quotes page has never really been about quoting people, it's seen as a repository of funny quips about DF. Personally, I don't think it's important enough to start finding all the real authors and adding the authors to the quotes when they appear on the front page. We're not going to bicker about the definition of the word "Quote" and if it's a valid designation or not for that page, I'll leave that kind of debate for Wikipedia. Also, I wouldn't be surprised if most of the "quotes" were made up for that list anyway. My final opinion is this: The more sentences we have in that list the better, I don't mind if there is no source attribution. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 00:19, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

::I like quote 2 (forum + wiki) so much that I'ld be willing to re-add it myself; don't care about the rest. --[[User:MathFox|MathFox]] 15:43, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:'''Restore''' And I'll also echo Senso's sentiments on the matter. -[[User:N9103|Edward]]

== Signatures ==

Do we want to include signatures? ("Toady" and a few other notables being exceptions). Isn't that a bit against the anonymous/collective idea of a wiki? Doesn't that personalize the edits and hurt the overall process? (And risk turning this into a "look at me!" page?)--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 21:02, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

:That sounds like a fine idea, if someone sees a quote with somebody's sinature, they can just delete the signature. --[[User:Frandude|Frandude]] 18:54, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

== Redirects in Quotes ==

Do you guys really think we should have [[]]'s in quotes? They mights help a bit, but it seems to take away a bit of the vibe. Thoughts about taking them down?
:I think the links are appropriate for drawing in and directing new users. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 17:47, 10 October 2009 (UTC)

== Inappropriate Undo ==

While you are free to re-add a removed quote, removal is a call to review those quotes which were removed. Undo is a blatant violation of that, as it doesn't necessitate even *looking* at what was removed. As such, I am undoing the undo, and ask that if the person wishes to re-add any of the quotes that he deliberately re-add the ones he actually thinks are funny. (Do note I moved a couple around because it was easier instead of de-incrementing numbers). Also, re-adding necessitates a discussion on this page - please have one before re-adding. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 20:09, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
: I want them back, 4 of the 5 were funny as they were, and there's no need to trim them since they doesnt break the page layout. Actually, I find your undo of the undo annoying, since they were fine quotes. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 20:48, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
::I deleted more than 5... =P And I moved some because it was easier than changing numbers. Which ones did you think were funny - I mean, we can have the discussion, but we need to have a discussion before they get re-added. (Also, the carp one is totally funnier with just the game quote) --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 23:50, 16 October 2009 (UTC)

== Seriously, Guys ==

I forget DF for a few months and you remove almost an entire kilobyte of quotes, along with the stupid goatse one which, while awful, was long since victorious in the protracted and bitter war over whether it should stay and in what form. Yes, it's quite clear you don't like some quotes. Yes, anyone is allowed to remove quotes but it's almost always the same very few people that do so, and the rules are clearly designed in your favor(delete anything you want with no justification, but add things only once unless you can change the deleter's mind). Would it kill you to at least '''add''' a little content to this page alongside removing so much? If I decided the main page was ugly and REMOVED IT wouldn't that still be a loss of content? Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:51, 25 October 2009 (UTC)

::Corona688, you have argued that the current system for deleting and undeleting quotes is bad. You have asked people who have removed quotes to be constructive instead. Let's turn this request around: when it comes to the issue of quote policy, please be constructive instead. I am sure you will be hard pressed to find anyone who disagrees with your complaints about the current system. They are all valid. However, despite these shortcomings, nobody has come up with a better one. If we decided the current policy was bad and just removed it without replacement, we would be worse off. "''Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave?''". [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

:I didn't remove the goatsects one, and while i didn't find it funny, i did respect the consensus of the talk page regarding it. The one quote i did add was removed in like a month.
:However, removing stuff from this page is as important as adding stuff - both types of people are needed to ensure a quality page. Otherwise we end up either with lots of crappy quotes or very few quotes. So don't disparage one side of the equation - both are essential. That said, expecting the people adding things to be funnier wouldn't be too much to expect, would it? There's still a lot of not funny in the quote list, and a few that could be funny with a little editing. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 00:41, 26 October 2009 (UTC)
::Yes, we need both. Not many folks would bother adding quotes more than once as is though, so we're seeing a net loss of content. I don't think the primary deleters here represent the One And Only True Correct Sense Of Humor™®ⓒ, and the rules as is unfairly pit content creators against them. Almost nobody cares one way or another except about their own quotes, you can't expect a consensus to readd when a good one is deleted. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 16:57, 27 October 2009 (UTC)

:::We are not experiencing a net loss of content. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

== Ok, that's enough ==

Squirrelloid, you have your own humor, but don't try to impose it on other people. If you don't find something funny doesn't mean you have to remove it.

You removed these 3 lines with your last edit :
* had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
* Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
* Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.

The last one is taken from an epic forum topic, the second one is funny because of the focus the dwarf have on olivine. The first one is from the dev log...

By the way, where is it written than quote MUST be funny ? --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:27, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::Re: Readding quotes
::One person is hardly consensus. Page policy:
:::"If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion."
:::"If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added."
::I certainly don't feel you've met the burden of that, and I certainly don't find those quotes funny.
::--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:26, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::: Make it two, with corona, there's no definite number of people needed AFAIK --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:35, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

::Also, you can't just go re-instating an old version if there's multiple subsequent versions. You actually deleted new material.
::On those specific quotes. The Dev log quote sucks. The delivery is awful. There may be a good line with the same base material, but that is certainly not it.
::The second one is clearly not in-game, because its impossible to generate that, which severely detracts from its humor value.
::And I don't care how epic the thread was, the quote isn't at all interesting.
::--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:31, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

Well, YOUR modification were not funny. So I removed them. If you want them back, you have to do a call for opinion :) --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:35, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T15:28:41Z

Karl: Undo revision 56509 by Squirrelloid (Talk)

{{Choose|c={{rand|84}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|I had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|"So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??" --alway
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
|The carp has drowned.
|Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|If I ''remembered'' what the &%^#*@! lever did, I'd ''pull'' it! <...pulls lever anyway...>
|<nowiki>::facepalm::</nowiki> Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago.
|Game Features: How much you ''want''? System Requirements: How much you ''got''?
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

Talk:Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T15:27:12Z

Karl:

== How to add quotes: ==

* Go to the line of the last quote.
* Add a line immediately after it (this should be before the closing }} brackets)
* type "|YOUR-QUOTE-HERE" on that line
:(The quote number is not functionally necessary, but it allows keeping track of how many quotes there are without counting)
* Look at the first line of the template
:It should look something like this:
<pre>{{Choose|c={{rand|37}}</pre>
*Adjust the number that is in the place of the 37 to reflect the number of quotes in the list.
*Preview your reply to make sure nothing is broken (or someone will be able to see it on the main page before it gets fixed)
*Profit!
[[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:34, 27 February 2008 (EST)

== When to add quotes: ==

So. We have a small problem here. People add quotes, people remove quotes, people un-remove quotes, and people make edit war. Suggestion: 
:Rough guidelines for [[Main Page/Quote]]:
:*New quotes are freely added.
:*Those quotes are freely removed.
:*If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion.
:*If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added.
:*If <user2> wants to get quotes re-removed once the previous consensus is old, <user2> can make a similar section.
:*Etcetera.
--[[User:Savok|Savok]] 18:24, 7 March 2009 (EST)
::I approve. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 18:53, 7 March 2009 (EST)
__TOC__

== Screenshots ==
The [http://www.dfwk.ru/index.php/%D0%97%D0%B0%D0%B3%D0%BB%D0%B0%D0%B2%D0%BD%D0%B0%D1%8F_%D1%81%D1%82%D1%80%D0%B0%D0%BD%D0%B8%D1%86%D0%B0 russian wiki] has made use of the system here to show random DF screenshots rather than quotes. I think this is a rather clever idea. Maybe we have a good spot where we could place something similar? [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 14:59, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

: Neat Idea. We could have one quote and one screenshoot. But we should define a standard size for the screenshot. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:36, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

::200x150 would make it fit the 800x600 curses, with proportional distortion all around, without taking up much in the way of page real estate. If the real estate is deemed not quite so valuable, then 400x300 would work even better, suffering half the overall distortion (but still maintaining a relatively small footprint, and keeping aspect ratio intact.) Unless we're happy with the smaller size I suggested, a page overhaul is going to be needed to find a place to put it, such that it doesn't make a jumble out of the rest of it. (Conversely, I think the 200x150 would fit very neatly in the space already allotted to one of the quotes.) --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 21:58, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

:Also, it could easily be arranged so that quotes and screenshots are paired. That way each screenshot has an accompanying caption. It would take quite a bit of work to get images for the current ones, though. I guess we could start them off as random stuff and switch them out as we go. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 02:40, 21 April 2009 (UTC)

:: How does one add screenshots? -- [[User:RomeoFalling|RomeoFalling]] 06:53, 7 October 2009 (UTC)
:::Which part don't you get? Saving screenshot, uploading image, adding it to the main page?
:::Assuming you mean the last bit - see [[Template talk:Sg]] - there should be some better form of documentation for [[Main page]] shouldn't there![[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 09:52, 7 October 2009 (UTC)

== "[B]loats" ==

For what it's worth, the nowiki formatting around square bracketed 'B' in the Toady quote about boats was simply in the interests of quoting accuracy; the original word was not capitalized and I still have that kind of formatting in my heart from college paper citations. --[[User:Alfador|Alfador]] 12:16, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

:Ah. It looked to me like a weird, failed boats/bloats pun. I don't think it really matters; you can change it back if you like. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 17:19, 24 March 2008 (EDT)

::Thank you! And done. --[[User:Alfador|Alfador]] 11:27, 25 March 2008 (EDT)

== Quote removal ==

Say, why was the "interrupted by carp" quote removed? I loved that one. --[[User:JT|JT]] 02:58, 13 April 2008 (EDT)

:Blame Savok, he thought it was unfunny. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMario]] 16:22, 24 April 2008 (EDT)

And regarding VengefulDonut stripping off that last one, PTTG's quote was simply hilarious. If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? --[[User:JT|JT]] 02:19, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

Thinking on this some more, the idea that anyone can just reverse a quote at their leisure strikes me as unusual. If a quote is an obvious spam, that's one thing; if a quote is something that ''you'' don't think of as funny, I think there should be some sort of consensus system involved. There are at least a couple existing quotes that I don't find funny in the slightest (Spiders Everywhere, you've been processed, GreyMario's), but I don't remove them. --[[User:JT|JT]]

My 2☼ on the subject: 
Unless a quote is offensively directed at a particular user/person, I don't see how there are any grounds for removal. 
If it is, it's perfectly acceptable for the addressed person to remove it, if they so choose. 
Additionally, you may remove quotes of yourself, whether or not they're offensive, regardless of who added the quote. 
In all cases, it's the sole responsibility of the addressed person to remove a quote, not someone else. 
I think that makes sense.. but perhaps I'm too far off base? --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 07:37, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

:When anyone is able to add a quote at their leisure, we will naturally end up with plenty of quotes that aren't funny. If anyone is able to remove a quote at their leisure, quotes that aren't funny will disappear. This is parallel to the wikipedia editing process in general, and I think this kind of process has decent results. Although I am open to other proposals.
:On the topic of racy jokes: I'm sure there are plenty of group-targeted jokes that could be stated in DF terms that would be very funny; just pick a group, a metaphor, and a stereotype. But even if you tell a member of that group to grow a thicker skin or to stop taking themselves seriously or learn to take a joke, it doesn't turn the joke from something alienating to something entertaining. In the right context, those kinds of jokes can be very funny even to those on the butt end of them. Standup comedians succeed or fail based on their ability to create it. But I don't think that the front page is the right context. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 10:24, 29 April 2008 (EDT)

::Unless its blantantly offensive I don't think "unfunny" is a reason to remove a quote, we each have our own sense of humour, such debate should be placed here on the discussion page imo. --[[User:Markavian|Markavian]] 20:30, 25 May 2008 (EDT)

:::Bleh. I'd like to, but nobody answers most discussion page debates in reasonable time. If we become more regularly active in discussion page debates (which isn't hard - we've got several that any experienced player can add to), we might be able to do that. As it is, the responses are usually at least a few days, often months apart. And then, occasionally, we get one that has five people with fifteen comments in a day or two. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 23:45, 31 May 2008 (EDT)

As I've said before, if you want to revert those of my deletes that you really think should stay, that's fine. The way I see it, and the way some have said before me, anybody can, if they think it's funny enough, add a quote to the page. Of course, we will get some pretty poor quotes that way, so anyone can, if they dislike it enough, delete a quote from that page. If an edit war occurs, we can take it to the talk page (with the war attention, we'll actually have commenters), where it can be resolved. We Are Not Wikipedia. We're too small for that; everyone knows everyone else and anyone can monitor all edits if they have a little time to spend. 
--[[User:Savok|Savok]], rambling at 23:45, 31 May 2008 (EDT)

== [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=19686.msg206978#msg206978 Too untasteful?] ==

I found this on the forums:
<div style="width: 12em; padding: 0.5em; margin-bottom: 1em; border: 1px solid #ccc; background: #eee; text-align: center">''Belbezevost Närangagak Äkig:'' 
Goatsects the Raw Red Anus of Stretching</div>
For? Against? --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 22:56, 24 June 2008 (EDT)

I'm for it. DF has people exploding in gore. Besides, these words are in the game anyway.
-- [[User:InquisitorSaturn|InquisitorSaturn]] 01:44, 3 July 2008 (EDT)

I'm for it. Lets be honest; how many people are likely to come to this wiki that aren't mature enough to enjoy a little mature humor. If anything people are more likely to complain that it didn't make them laugh then that they are worried that kids might see it. --[[User:Silver|Silver]] 01:29, 23 July 2008 (EDT)

:Nobody gives a fuck about the kids, man. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 22:32, 29 October 2008 (EDT)

For - Very funny and clever --[[User:Cultiststeve|cultiststeve]] 17:33, 15 January 2009 (EST)

Against. I think it might be funny once or twice, but it is not necessarily something that I want to see on the front page for hours until the quote changes again. --[[User:i2amroy|i2amroy]] 10:26 June 14 (MST)

:Mmmm... against. When there were 2 quotes on the page, maybe. But now that there's only 1, I'd rather not have this be "representative" of any DF experience, when it's simply not. In fact, it has nothing to do with DF - it's just crude. (Not that that's a bad thing - it just has nothing to do with DF.) --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 19:41, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

== Multi-Line Quotes ==

I assumed your multi-line quote was an error because it rendered incorrectly when it appeared on http://www.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Main_Page/Quote , and did so again when you restored the original. I've re-re-restored it in the interests of peace but I do note that the text extends outside the box and one line actually appears below the box. I'm less certain whether it appears this way on the main page. Perhaps we need a different way to enter multi-line quotes? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:39, 31 October 2008 (EDT)

:The quote that's causing problems is kinda long, either way. How about we just bonk it on the head?--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 19:15, 31 October 2008 (EDT)
::But it's funny. :( --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 01:55, 1 November 2008 (EDT)

:Just out of curiosity, what browser? It appears just fine in Firefox 2. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 17:39, 4 November 2008 (EST)
::Firefox 3. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:19, 11 November 2008 (EST)

:My multi-line quote (shown below) doesn't appear to break anything (browser used: Firefox 3). --[[User:Beerdude26|Beerdude26]] 15:26, 22 January 2009 (EST)

<blockquote>
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?"

'''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
</blockquote>

== Okay wtf who broke shit where. ==

On the main page, the second random quote is just a '. WHAT GIVES? --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 14:32, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:I can't find any recent changes to the code of the selector, and given that the first selector works, it's hard to blame a syntax error either. The mainpage does a weird thing to guarantee the quotes are different, passing |1 to the page as a parameter or...something. Someone who knows wikicode may know what's going on. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:13, 20 November 2008 (EST)

::The problem is a bit deeper. [[template:rand]] and [[template:rand2]] use the mod function inside a #expr to mod the current timestamp and return a number in a specified range. The mod function is returning negative values for large inputs (this is a bug). Since it seems I can't guarantee a positive number will have a positive mod, I don't know how to modify the templates to make sure they keep returning positive numbers. Smaller inputs would be nice, but I need it to vary with time, and those are the ones that are blowing it up. Also, I don't have absolute value or any binary number operations, so those methods are out. Absolute value would be available with a newer version of parser functions, but convincing [[user:senso|Senso]] is an obstacle there. I'm really not sure how to remedy this. Anyone have ideas? [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 19:43, 20 November 2008 (EST)

::: I say divide the end result before modulusing by 4. That'll still give pseudo-random numbers, just less often, and might work until a better fix rears its not-so-ugly head. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:12, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::: <s>Good idea. I'll try it. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:21, 20 November 2008 (EST)</s>
:::: Didn't work. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:23, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:::: Feel free to fool around with [[template:rand]] and push a fix if you can find one. Just make sure to preview. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 20:24, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::::Ah well, it was worth a shot. I'll see what I can come up with in the [[Template:Sandbox|sandbox]]. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:31, 20 November 2008 (EST)
:::::<s>UPDATE: It appears using <tt><nowiki>{{#expr: ((({{LOCALTIMESTAMP}} / 1024) + {{CURRENTDAY}} + {{CURRENTMONTH}}) mod {{{1|100}}}) + 1}}</nowiki></tt> seems to produce positive numbers for now. I'll go update [[Template:Rand2]] and see if it works.</s> <s>So much for that, but at least it was returning positive numbers. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:42, 20 November 2008 (EST)</s>
:::::Okay, I blame certain things being slow for the fact that it works over in the Sandbox but not in the Main Page/Quote template. :S But the good news is, it's at least producing a result over at the sandbox. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 20:54, 20 November 2008 (EST)

:::Can you use an <nowiki> {{ #ifexpr: {{{num}}} >= 0 | {{{num}}} | {{ #expr: {{{num}}} * -1 }} }} </nowiki> to replace abs? (I may have the syntax slightly wrong.)--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 04:09, 21 November 2008 (EST)

::::Good call, Maximus. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 09:04, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:::::You know, I thought of that just last night but was too busy falling asleep. :( --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 15:21, 21 November 2008 (EST)

::::::I stole it off your desk.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 18:06, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:Here we go again! It's started displaying the telltale ' again. D: --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 00:05, 27 November 2008 (EST) UPDATE: It's just gone away again. Might be worth a try to check the conditions next time it does it D: --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 00:08, 27 November 2008 (EST)

::Should be fixed now. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 18:04, 6 December 2008 (EST)

== What's This Jreengus Stuff About, Anyway? ==

Googling it just gets me pages telling me it's funny for those in the know somehow. If any place ought to have an explanation it's the wiki. That's what it's there for! :) --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 13:05, 21 November 2008 (EST)

:Kobolds speak gibberish. The code that named an event allowed the kobolds to name it (when they won? maybe.), and that caused the name of an event to sometimes be a single word of gibberish. Toady mentioned that somewhere in some part of the dev notes.
:That's it. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 17:17, 21 November 2008 (EST)

== Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal. ==

Haaaaawhaaahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa. Awesome. We need more quotes that are as funny as this. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 17:48, 25 November 2008 (EST)
:How many people can understand dwarven without dictionary? :) Anyway, the quote is still funny as is. [[User:Kurokikaze|Kurokikaze]] 12:13, 14 October 2009 (UTC)

== Long quotes ==

"Engraved on the wall is a masterfully designed image of a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving on a wall. The engraving is a dwarf engraving on a wall. The engraving is a dwarf mining out a wall." Yes this is a long quote but it's also funny, why ditch it? I didn't see any long quotes breaking the mainpage the way multi-line quotes did. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:59, 12 December 2008 (EST)

:They make the main page look like crap by stretching the quote box and pushing down everything else. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:31, 12 December 2008 (EST)
:Surely there are other places to put funny things. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:33, 12 December 2008 (EST)

::Not really, unless you mean 'keep this stuff off the wiki'. No, quotes aren't a big deal. They're just fun, i.e. 'the entire point'. ;p The Quote_Archive is an obvious aging relic, and ought to go anyway since there's no sense having multiple, separate pages of slightly different functionality and identical content patchily duplicating each other. I wonder if the quote wikicode could be done the other way around... I might play around on my talk page and see if I can build a useful something. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 17:33, 12 December 2008 (EST)

:::The Quote Archive was originally created as a place for quotes to go to never be deleted, so that it wouldn't be that bad if someone lost a quote from Main Page/Quote. When I created it, I didn't realize the effort it would take to update it, so I'm going to go over there now and clean it up, making it all plaintext.
:::Also, I concur with Vengeful that the long quotes are overly ugly on the main page. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 22:35, 12 December 2008 (EST)
::::Not arguing with that. I usually run screens at a high resolution so I didn't notice the stretching myself. I do think multiple quote pages is pointless though, 'specially considering folk like me will happen upon them and helpfully transfer stuff from one to the other... Not that I would, but I had often considered doing so, obviously misunderstanding your intent in all that duplicate information. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 00:15, 13 December 2008 (EST)

:I agree in principle - many recently deleted are not (imo) a dealbreaker, but there has to be a limit somewhere. I just posted a guideline at the top of the page which reads:
::LIMIT QUOTES TO 150 CHARACTERS (as most are below)
::LONGER QUOTES MAY BE SNIPPED OR DELETED!
:- which seems the max currently. (Only visible when editing, allcaps for max visibility/impact.)
:I also edited several existing long quotes into shorter, acceptable format - some of those were funny, and while changing others' quotes is not my preferred option, this is a wiki, and it's that or lose them.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 04:05, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

== Edit Warring ==
I see GreyMario has taken it upon himself to remove quotes by the dozen, most of which had previously been added back after someone noticed their mysterious absence. Clearly your sense of humor is not everyone's or people wouldn't have to keep adding them back, could you just leave it be instead of editwarring? Can someone give us a revert, please? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 23:24, 4 January 2009 (EST)

:Except they were removed because they were unfunny by popular vote. People should really put it up to a vote when it comes to adding them back. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 01:24, 5 January 2009 (EST)

::I must have missed this, where did it happen? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 14:21, 5 January 2009 (EST)

:::In general, I think the replacement of deleted quotes is more of a problem than their deletion. As long as they are added just once and deleted just once, we won't have an edit war even with conflicting views of humor. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 09:28, 11 January 2009 (EST)

I agree, most of those votes were not funny. They were not even remotely close to my "mind like a +whatever trap+" quote, and it's hard to be worse than that and still funny. Anyway, edit warring=no, people should ask what happened to them and it then should be explained exactly what did happen. Personally, I think that they should be left on the quote archive, but not popping up on the main page for all to see.--[[User:Destor|Destor]] 12:12, 5 January 2009 (EST)

== 6 deleted quotes - call for opinions ==

Here are 6 quotes that were deleted after being added. I believe they are worth keeping - wouldn't have added them if I didn't, but one other user disagreed enough to delete them all. Opinions on any or all are requested.

:*Look, there's sentient lava outside, & the only survivor is issuing mandates to the empty halls. This isn't going to get better.
::Goddamn I am ''sick'' of this constant editwarring. If I went around removing everything I didn't think was funny the quotes page would be cut in half, but I try to respect other people's content and acknowlege other people's sense of humor. This was not a misquote originally, someone just shortened it into one, and butchered both the content and the english language in the process. "There's sentient lava outside" is perilously close to lolspeak. "There are roving clumps of sentient lava outside", on the other hand, is a mental picture that gets a laugh reaction from 4/5 folks I show it to. I'm putting it back. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 20:36, 30 June 2009 (UTC)
:::Vengeful donut took this to my talk page for some reason, I'm responding here. Humor is a matter of taste, unlike most of the rest of the wiki, and one person shouldn't try and define it for everyone. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 23:44, 1 July 2009 (UTC)

:*On the forums is a masterful rendition of an image of a human reading a dwarf fortress wiki. The human has '''no clue''' what is going on.

:*Seeing a dwarf give birth while sparring was scary, but worse was when she picked the child up & continued fighting.

:*The merchants won't leave because I killed their guys & I can't drown them because there's a shoe in the floodgate.

:*All I do is lure the gobbos in and throw the lever to flood the central chamber, & the goblins start sorting themselves by density.

:*The mayor sent me to kill the crocodile that killed my last 3 characters - again... I think he's catching on that I want to kill him.
--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 06:49, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

::It's worth noting that these are all misquotes. They have been modified from their original versions. Since these is a list of '''quotes''' rather than just '''jokes''' misquotes do not belong here. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 07:57, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:::IMO, we don't even credit the quotes so it's not ''that'' important to keep the original phrase intact. The quotes are here to add a funny aspect to the front page, it's not like we're quoting the President about some Important Matter. If a quote breaks the box, I say it's fine to shorten it until it fits, as long as the original spirit is kept. We could always ask the quote's author for their approval, if it's that important. Can we track the origin of those quotes? If not, let's edit them since nobody can prove they're actual quotes anyway. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 13:52, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

::::If we're not going to pretend that we're quoting people, perhaps we should rename the page. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 16:16, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:::::A bunch of sentences without any credits are not proper quotes so in fact, the Quotes page has never really been about quoting people, it's seen as a repository of funny quips about DF. Personally, I don't think it's important enough to start finding all the real authors and adding the authors to the quotes when they appear on the front page. We're not going to bicker about the definition of the word "Quote" and if it's a valid designation or not for that page, I'll leave that kind of debate for Wikipedia. Also, I wouldn't be surprised if most of the "quotes" were made up for that list anyway. My final opinion is this: The more sentences we have in that list the better, I don't mind if there is no source attribution. --[[User:Senso|Senso]] 00:19, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

::I like quote 2 (forum + wiki) so much that I'ld be willing to re-add it myself; don't care about the rest. --[[User:MathFox|MathFox]] 15:43, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

:'''Restore''' And I'll also echo Senso's sentiments on the matter. -[[User:N9103|Edward]]

== Signatures ==

Do we want to include signatures? ("Toady" and a few other notables being exceptions). Isn't that a bit against the anonymous/collective idea of a wiki? Doesn't that personalize the edits and hurt the overall process? (And risk turning this into a "look at me!" page?)--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 21:02, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

:That sounds like a fine idea, if someone sees a quote with somebody's sinature, they can just delete the signature. --[[User:Frandude|Frandude]] 18:54, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

== Redirects in Quotes ==

Do you guys really think we should have [[]]'s in quotes? They mights help a bit, but it seems to take away a bit of the vibe. Thoughts about taking them down?
:I think the links are appropriate for drawing in and directing new users. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 17:47, 10 October 2009 (UTC)

== Inappropriate Undo ==

While you are free to re-add a removed quote, removal is a call to review those quotes which were removed. Undo is a blatant violation of that, as it doesn't necessitate even *looking* at what was removed. As such, I am undoing the undo, and ask that if the person wishes to re-add any of the quotes that he deliberately re-add the ones he actually thinks are funny. (Do note I moved a couple around because it was easier instead of de-incrementing numbers). Also, re-adding necessitates a discussion on this page - please have one before re-adding. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 20:09, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
: I want them back, 4 of the 5 were funny as they were, and there's no need to trim them since they doesnt break the page layout. Actually, I find your undo of the undo annoying, since they were fine quotes. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 20:48, 16 October 2009 (UTC)
::I deleted more than 5... =P And I moved some because it was easier than changing numbers. Which ones did you think were funny - I mean, we can have the discussion, but we need to have a discussion before they get re-added. (Also, the carp one is totally funnier with just the game quote) --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 23:50, 16 October 2009 (UTC)

::Re: Readding quotes
::One person is hardly consensus. Page policy:
:::"If <user> wants to get quotes re-added, <user> can make a section here stating that they should be and asking for opinion."
:::"If consensus doesn't state "no, don't re-add them" for a while, the quotes can be freely added."
::I certainly don't feel you've met the burden of that, and I certainly don't find those quotes funny.
::--[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:26, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

== Seriously, Guys ==

I forget DF for a few months and you remove almost an entire kilobyte of quotes, along with the stupid goatse one which, while awful, was long since victorious in the protracted and bitter war over whether it should stay and in what form. Yes, it's quite clear you don't like some quotes. Yes, anyone is allowed to remove quotes but it's almost always the same very few people that do so, and the rules are clearly designed in your favor(delete anything you want with no justification, but add things only once unless you can change the deleter's mind). Would it kill you to at least '''add''' a little content to this page alongside removing so much? If I decided the main page was ugly and REMOVED IT wouldn't that still be a loss of content? Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 18:51, 25 October 2009 (UTC)

::Corona688, you have argued that the current system for deleting and undeleting quotes is bad. You have asked people who have removed quotes to be constructive instead. Let's turn this request around: when it comes to the issue of quote policy, please be constructive instead. I am sure you will be hard pressed to find anyone who disagrees with your complaints about the current system. They are all valid. However, despite these shortcomings, nobody has come up with a better one. If we decided the current policy was bad and just removed it without replacement, we would be worse off. "''Wouldn't it be rude of me to expect others to fill in holes I leave?''". [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

:I didn't remove the goatsects one, and while i didn't find it funny, i did respect the consensus of the talk page regarding it. The one quote i did add was removed in like a month.
:However, removing stuff from this page is as important as adding stuff - both types of people are needed to ensure a quality page. Otherwise we end up either with lots of crappy quotes or very few quotes. So don't disparage one side of the equation - both are essential. That said, expecting the people adding things to be funnier wouldn't be too much to expect, would it? There's still a lot of not funny in the quote list, and a few that could be funny with a little editing. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 00:41, 26 October 2009 (UTC)
::Yes, we need both. Not many folks would bother adding quotes more than once as is though, so we're seeing a net loss of content. I don't think the primary deleters here represent the One And Only True Correct Sense Of Humor™®ⓒ, and the rules as is unfairly pit content creators against them. Almost nobody cares one way or another except about their own quotes, you can't expect a consensus to readd when a good one is deleted. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 16:57, 27 October 2009 (UTC)

:::We are not experiencing a net loss of content. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 00:19, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

== Ok, that's enough ==

Squirrelloid, you have your own humor, but don't try to impose it on other people. If you don't find something funny doesn't mean you have to remove it.

You removed these 3 lines with your last edit :
* had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
* Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
* Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.

The last one is taken from an epic forum topic, the second one is funny because of the focus the dwarf have on olivine. The first one is from the dev log...

By the way, where is it written than quote MUST be funny ? --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:27, 29 October 2009 (UTC)

Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T15:21:52Z

Karl: I stated an opinion on the talk page, none disagreed, I added them back, you have to call for opinion if you want to remove them.

{{Choose|c={{rand|84}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|I had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|"So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??" --alway
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
|The carp has drowned.
|Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|If I ''remembered'' what the &%^#*@! lever did, I'd ''pull'' it! <...pulls lever anyway...>
|<nowiki>::facepalm::</nowiki> Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago.
|Game Features: How much you ''want''? System Requirements: How much you ''got''?
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

Main Page/Quote

2009-10-29T02:05:20Z

Karl: readded some deleted quote since they are funny.

{{Choose|c={{rand|84}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|I had somebody shoot my toe off with a crossbow, which was cool... It just happened that the toe was narrow enough to be removed. -- Dev Log, 08/18/09
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|"So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??" --alway
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
|The carp has drowned.
|Only in Dwarf Fortress would you try to catch a mermaid to butcher her and make trophies out of her bones.
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|If I ''remembered'' what the &%^#*@! lever did, I'd ''pull'' it! <...pulls lever anyway...>
|<nowiki>::facepalm::</nowiki> Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago.
|Game Features: How much you ''want''? System Requirements: How much you ''got''?

}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

40d Talk:Easter eggs

2009-10-20T15:46:48Z

Karl: /* Dungeons and Dragons? */

Discuss HIDDEN FUN STUFF here instead of the forum, and leave the spoilers to the people who want to be spoiled. --[[User:Jackard|Jackard]] 21:22, 5 February 2008 (EST)

:what happens to the old stuff from 2d, like the comments about when you scroll FAR too far into the back of the mountain or back towards home? --[[User:Frostedfire|Frostedfire]] 08:27, 13 May 2008 (EDT)

==Oink sound==
I just checked that easter egg out, turns out that it always plays during the intro, it's just masked by saying the "quality" word. When you hold the title bar it just pauses the program so you can hear them separately.--[[User:Richards|Richards]] 18:49, 12 May 2008 (EDT)
:Yeah, I just noticed that earlier too. Odd. --[[User:GreyMario|GreyMaria]] 13:58, 13 May 2008 (EDT)
The oink sound is in the data/sound folder and it's called bayend --[[User:Vanarbulax|Vanarbulax]] 5:50, 7 July 1008 (EST)

== Old Easter Eggs? ==

What happened to the well/bucket thing? I never saw it myself, but it used to be here. Has it dissapeared? --[[User:Solarshado|Solarshado]] 14:07, 22 December 2008 (EST)

==Dungeons and Dragons?==
Um, what. I typed in 'electrum'. Nothing special happened... --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 05:27, 20 October 2009 (UTC)

:With all respect to the reversion, 'electu' doesn't generate anything at all. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 08:46, 20 October 2009 (UTC)
::Certainly does for me. d40. {{k|j}}obs, {{k|m}}anager, {{k|q}}ueue new order, "electu". --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 14:52, 20 October 2009 (UTC)
:: Same thing here, I can see the easter without problem. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:46, 20 October 2009 (UTC)

Bloodline:Succession League Members

2009-10-17T16:47:31Z

Karl: /* Members* */

Members of the [[Succession League]].

=Members*=
{| border="1"
|+'''Member Info'''
|-
! ID
! Nickname
! [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php Bay12 Forum Name]
! Activity
! League Games
! Ability Rating
! Personality Rating
! Punctuality
! Games Completed
|-
| 0
| [[User:The Architect|The Architect]]
| The Architect
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 11
| N/A
| Arkaine
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 2
| N/A
| Barbarossa the Seal God
| style="color:orange"| November09
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 14
| [[User:Cheepicus|Cheepicus]]
| N/A
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 10
| [[User:Briess|Briess]]
| Locriani
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 5
| N/A
| Chewykittens
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 7
| N/A
| Dante`
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 16
| [[DJ Work Safety|DJ Work Safety]]
| DJ Work Safety
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 13
| [[User:Karl|Karl]]
| Karl
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 17
| [[User:Kelsa|Kelsa]]
| kelsa
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 3
| [[User:Kilakan|Kilakan]]
| kilakan
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 4
| N/A
| killaconcarnage
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 18
| N/A
| Lafiel
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 12
| N/A
| Linthar
| style="color:green"| Available
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 6
| [[User:Morinon|Morinon]]
| Dead Winter Reigns
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 19
| [[User:Rogabeetah|Rogabeetah]]
| Rogabeetah
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 1
| [[User:Sava2004|Sava2004]]
| sava2004
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 15
| N/A
| Syzgyn
| style="color:orange"| November09
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 8
| N/A
| Tack
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 9
| N/A
| TauQuebb
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|-
| 20
| [[User:Qcrane|Qcrane]]
| N/A
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| 0
|}

*''This will soon include statistics for members, and will remain alphabetical. This is largely a democracy and anyone wishing to implement new ideas such as "titles" (founder, veteran, rookie, etc) should discuss it in the [[Talk:Succession League Members|Discussion]] page. If you don't like your statistics, they can be Reset. If your statistics REALLY don't like you (stats come from fellow players), then YOU may be Reset(suspended from the League). Only extreme behavior on the level of repetitive vandalism (in game and on here) will warrant this. See [[Succession League Policies|Policies]]

Talk:Main Page/Quote

2009-10-16T20:48:59Z

Karl: /* Inappropriate Undo */

40d:Equipment and encumbrance

2009-10-15T02:13:57Z

Karl: /* Material weight and protection */

Depending on what '''equipment''' you outfit your [[soldier]]s with, they can easily become [[encumbrance|encumbered]]. A new recruit with no strength [[attribute]], for instance, can only carry 2000Γ before being encumbered, which is less than the weight of a full suit of chain mail, not even including a weapon. A [[crossbow]] plus a full stack of metal [[bolts]] can weigh as much as 1000Γ by itself.

== Armor weight ==

To begin with, dwarves wearing [[armor]] will not remove their civilian clothes before putting on armor. These civilian clothes can total as much as 171Γ (if everything is made of [[leather]]), or even 247Γ if they are wearing a coat. However, 165Γ is probably a better estimate given that silk and cloth items (which weigh 20%-30% less than leather) are typically intermixed with leather items. Additionally, soldiers' clothing tends to rot away to nothing as their armor prevents them from replacing it.

A suit of leather armor (consisting of leather armor plus leather helm, leggings, and high boots) weighs 450Γ (this includes the civilian clothes dwarves will wear underneath it). Even when combined with a steel shield (392Γ), steel crossbow (314Γ), and a stack of 30 steel bolts (725Γ including quiver), any dwarf can manage this without movement penalties.

A full suit of steel or iron chain mail (mail, leggings, gauntlets, helm, and shield) plus regular clothing weighs 2322Γ; add a typical metal weapon and your draftees will only be moving at 75% normal speed.

However, if you limit the availability of certain types of armor, either by not producing them (or forbidding them, as outlined on the [[Military#Swapping weapons and armour|military]] page), you can force your dwarves to wear hybrid suits which offer excellent protection while still being fairly light.

A steel-bone-leather chain suit, consisting of steel chain mail and helm, leather high boots and shield, and bone or shell leggings and gauntlets, weighs 1180Γ (including clothes). Even when carrying a steel crossbow and 25 steel bolts (921Γ, for a total of 2101Γ), a non-Strong dwarf can still move at 95% of normal speed. Leather leggings can be used instead of bone, although they weigh 32Γ more. A wood or bone crossbow instead of steel would bring the total down to 1835Γ or less, which would allow you to add a steel cap and leather armor for additional protection (see [[#Armor layering|armor layering]], below).

Another possibility is to set your dwarves to "plate" armor level but not make metal plate armor available. This will allow them to upgrade from bone leggings to bone greaves, which only weigh 22Γ more but offer 40% more protection for the legs.

A steel-bone-leather plate suit, consisting of steel plate mail and helm, leather high boots and shield, and bone or shell greaves and gauntlets, weighs 1791Γ. Even when wielding a typical melee weapon (314Γ), a dwarf will still be able to move at 95% of normal speed. A Strong dwarf, with a carrying capacity of 3000Γ, can afford to add a chain suit underneath this, or to upgrade a few pieces of leather or bone to steel, or even to carry a crossbow ''and'' upgrade a few pieces of armor.

A full suit of steel plate, greaves, gauntlets, high boots, helm, and shield plus clothing weighs 3068Γ. Add to this a melee weapon, and you're at 3400Γ; any non-strong dwarf would have his or her movement rate reduced to about 59% as a result. A quiver full of bolts and additional layers of armor can add 1400Γ+ more, resulting in a dwarf reduced to 42% normal speed. Such equipment should not be assigned to any but Strong or Very Strong dwarves, or those with sufficient [[armor user]] skill.

Using a buckler instead of a shield is not recommended. [[Shield user]] skill is probably gained only when an attack is successfully blocked with a shield, and bucklers theoretically block only half as many blows as shields. Although the exact game mechanics are unknown (and unlikely to be linear when skill is factored in), the important point is that dwarves using shields instead of bucklers will gain shield user skill more quickly, and high shield user skill makes dwarves very resistant to damage, even against bolts and arrows.

Always put your dwarves in the best helm you can; even slight neck and brain [[wound|injuries]] can effectively end a melee combatant's career while serious ones can permanently cripple the dwarf. A steel helm weighs only 157Γ, and combining it with a steel cap, which weighs just 78Γ, will increase protection by about another 30%.

Backpacks add a negligible amount of weight; 19Γ, plus 5Γ for each unit of food.

Waterskins weigh 5Γ. With three units of water, they weigh 32Γ.

== Armor layering ==

It is possible for dwarves to wear multiple layers of armor; specifically, they can wear leather armor under chain mail, and chain mail under plate mail (but not all three). They can also wear either a leather or cloth cap and a steel cap under any kind of helm, although you cannot order them to wear the leather/cloth one due to it being counted as clothing. (They will not combine any kind of leggings, greaves, or gauntlets.) Dwarves will only layer armor in this manner, however, if they are already wearing the "under" layers when they are switched to a higher armor level. A dwarf already wearing chain mail, for instance, will not remove it when putting on plate. However, a dwarf wearing regular clothing, if switched straight to "plate" armor level, will generally put on a plate suit straight away, and never add anything underneath it. The same dwarf will put on a chain suit if no plate is available, however, and will add a plate suit to it later on if one becomes available.

A steel cap and leather armor will add 173Γ to a chain suit. Cap and chain under a plate suit will add 666Γ.

== Weapons and ammunition ==

[[Weapon]] weights range from 235Γ for a steel short sword to 628Γ for a steel battle axe. Most dwarf-usable weapons made of steel, including crossbows, weigh 314Γ. [[Obsidian]] swords weigh 80Γ, and wooden weapons you can buy from the elven [[caravan]] typically weigh 30Γ or less. Wooden or bone crossbows weigh 48Γ or less, which is a major advantage over metal crossbows due to the fact that their [[material]] only affects their melee damage, and not their shooting damage.

A stack of 25 iron or steel bolts weighs 588Γ; quivers weigh between 13Γ and 19Γ, depending on their material. Dwarves will carry a stack of metal bolts in their quivers if any are available, meaning a fully outfitted marksdwarf will be carrying 650Γ-900Γ worth of weaponry, depending on whether their crossbow is metal or bone/wood. Dwarves carrying crossbows and metal bolts should be carefully outfitted with light armor, such as a steel-bone-leather chain suit as detailed in [[#Armor weight|armor weight]], above. Weight will also be reduced (albeit at the cost of damage) if no metal bolts are available, causing marksdwarves to seek out wooden and bone ones instead, which weigh 90Γ or less per stack of 25.

Dwarves assigned to carry a crossbow will, in theory, never [[sparring|spar]], instead shooting at an archery range if possible and slacking off if not. However, you may occasionally catch one sparring anyways, using his crossbow as a hammer. This isn't supposed to happen, and is generally due to a bug where he has wound up "wielding" something that he shouldn't, meaning he cannot use that hand and thus cannot properly handle ammunition. {{verify}} If you see a sparring marksdwarf, check his inventory for anything out of the ordinary in his hands, most commonly armor or clothing that he has ripped off of somebody during combat or sparring. If this is the case, mark it for dumping in the hopes of freeing up the hand so that it no longer interferes with target practice (or sparring, if you decide just to switch him to a "real" hammer).

== Material weight and protection ==

Steel and iron items have the same weight and are interchangeable, in terms of encumbrance. Bronze (and bismuth bronze) items weigh about 5% more than steel or iron. Copper items weigh 14% more. Silver items weigh 34% more (silver weapons, due to their low damage, make good sparring weapons). Bone and shell items weigh about ''14%'' that of steel; leather items weigh 24%; and wood items weigh anywhere from 15% to 1.3% (in the case of feather tree wood). More specific comparative weights can be looked up in the [[raws]].

[[Item quality|Top-quality]] bone or leather items offer as much protection as no-quality iron items, so having a legendary bone carver and leatherworker in your fort should be quite welcome. Copper, in addition to being very heavy, is only about 33% better than bone or leather, so in general, you should not bother making armor items out of copper unless you are using it to train up an [[armorsmith]].

== Armored civvies ==

A number of civilian pieces of [[clothing]] offer a fair amount of protection, especially when of very high quality. These can be used to protect non-military dwarves, or to boost the protection soldiers normally get from the clothing they wear under their armor.

Since these items must be made of leather or cloth (this is also true for leather armor, incidentally), their rated protection is cut in half, although very high quality items can double protection, mitigating the problem. A bigger problem is their tendency to [[wear]] after a few years (unlike leather armor, leggings, boots, and helms). It is not known if wear reduces their protection value. After about 10 years, they will wear out completely and disappear.

Coats offer 15 points of protection, only a little less than leather armor's 20 points. This protection apparently extends to the entire upper body (unlike all other forms of armor), potentially making them even better than leather armor. Dwarves will wear either a robe or a coat, but not both, although they will happily wear both a coat and leather armor (and chain, and plate).

Gloves, shoes, and even socks, amazingly, offer 60 points of protection, the same as that of gauntlets or boots (although gauntlets also protect the forearms and high boots protect the lower legs).

Caps offer 20 points of protection. A cloth or leather cap can be worn in addition to a metal cap and any kind of helm. Finally, trousers offer 20 points of protection to the legs.

Although silk is the lightest possible material for making these items, it doesn't really matter what material you use; the difference between a full set of civilian clothes (including coat) in leather versus silk is only 78Γ, and the difference between plant cloth versus silk is only 26Γ. If you have a high-skill [[clothier]] use cloth; if you have a high-skill [[leatherworker]] use leather; otherwise use whatever material you have in abundance.

Unfortunately, the downside to all of this is that getting your citizens to put on specific items can only really be done on a fortress-wide basis, and even then it can be hit-or-miss. Pretty much all you can do is to craft nothing but that sort of clothing and wait for the dwarves' current clothes to rot off and (hopefully) be replaced with the new stuff. A bit of extra protecton can be worth it, however, especially since there is so little micromanagement possible.

== Recommended combinations ==

To avoid excessively slow soldiers, you must ensure that your weaker dwarves carry an appropriate amount of equipment. The following are a set of recommended combinations of equipment and dwarven abilities.

"Steel" means iron or steel (both weigh the same); steel/bone suits have steel for all pieces except for greaves/leggings (plate/chain) and gauntlets. (Other worthwhile substitutions for specific pieces of armor are outlined in [[#Non-steel equipment|non-steel equipment]], above.) Steel plate+ means a normal full set of steel plate plus leather armor, steel chain, and a steel cap underneath.

"Effective weight" is the weight of all armor plus 165Γ worth of clothing, plus weapon (if any); armor user skill reduces the weight of clothing and armor, but not weapons or ammo (or shield?), as outlined at [[armor user]]. No-strength dwarves can carry 2000Γ worth of equipment; Strong, 3000Γ; Very Strong, 4000Γ; and so on.

If your equipment is bronze instead of steel, encumbrance penalties will be a few percent worse (provided the dwarf is already encumbered); copper equipment will be about 10%-15% worse.

A steel or iron shield is assumed (and recommended) for all configurations.

{|cellpadding="2" border="1"
|+ '''Unarmed or with light weapon'''
! Strength !! Armor user skill !! Equipment !! Effective weight !! Speed
|-
| none || none || Steel/bone chain || 1715Γ || 100%
|-
| none || none || Steel chain ''or'' Steel/bone plate || 2325Γ || 86%
|-
| none || (no label) || Steel chain ''or'' Steel/bone plate || 1962Γ || 100%
|-
| none || Talented || Steel plate || 1908Γ || 100%
|-
| none || Expert || Steel plate+ || 1904Γ || 100%
|-
| Strong || none || Steel plate || 3088Γ || 96%
|-
| Strong || none || Steel plate+ || 3849Γ || 71%
|-
| Strong || Competent || Steel plate+ || 2985Γ || 100%
|-
| Very Strong || none || Steel plate+ || 3849Γ || 100%
|} 

{|cellpadding="2" border="1"
|+ '''With metal melee weapon (~314Γ)'''
! Strength !! Armor user skill !! Equipment !! Effective weight !! Speed
|-
| none || none || Steel/bone chain || 2029Γ || 99%
|-
| none || none || Steel chain ''or'' Steel/bone plate || 2639Γ || 76%
|-
| none || Proficient || Steel chain ''or'' Steel/bone plate || 1914Γ || 100%
|-
| Strong || none || Steel plate || 3402Γ || 83%
|-
| Strong || (no label) || Steel plate || 2897Γ || 100%
|-
| Strong || Proficient || Steel plate+ || 2867Γ || 100%
|-
| Very Strong || none || Steel plate+ || 4163Γ || 92%
|} 

{|cellpadding="2" border="1"
|+ '''With battle axe or 25 metal bolts and bone/wood crossbow (~650Γ)'''
! Strength !! Armor user skill !! Equipment !! Effective weight !! Speed
|-
| none || none || Steel/bone chain || 2365Γ || 85%
|-
| none || Competent || Steel/bone chain || 2034Γ || 98%
|-
| Strong || none || Steel chain ''or'' Steel/bone plate || 2985Γ || 100%
|-
| Strong || none || Steel plate || 3738Γ || 73%
|-
| Strong || Skilled || Steel plate || 2896Γ || 100%
|-
| Very Strong || none || Steel plate || 3738Γ || 100%
|-
| Very Strong || none || Steel plate+ || 4499Γ || 80%
|-
| Very Strong || (no label) || Steel plate+ || 3851Γ || 100%
|-
| Extremely Strong || none || Steel plate+ || 4499Γ || 100%
|} 

{|cellpadding="2" border="1"
|+ '''With 25 metal bolts and metal crossbow (921Γ)'''
! Strength !! Armor user skill !! Equipment !! Effective weight !! Speed
|-
| none || none || Leather || 1763Γ || 100%
|-
| none || none || Steel/bone chain || 2636Γ || 76%
|-
| none || Adept || Steel/bone chain || 2074Γ || 96%
|-
| Strong || none || Steel/bone chain || 2636Γ || 100%
|-
| Strong || none || Steel chain ''or'' Steel/bone plate || 3256Γ || 89%
|-
| Strong || (no label) || Steel chain ''or'' Steel/bone plate || 2883Γ || 100%
|-
| Very Strong || none || Steel plate || 4009Γ || 99%
|-
| Very Strong || none || Steel plate+ || 4770Γ || 72%
|-
| Very Strong || Competent || Steel plate+ || 3905Γ || 100%
|-
| Extremely Strong || none || Steel plate+ || 4770Γ || 100%
|}

== Individual item weights ==

;Clothing:

* Most regular pieces of clothing weigh 19Γ (if leather), 15Γ if cloth, or 13Γ if silk.
* Trousers weigh twice as much (38Γ in leather).
* Coats weigh five times as much (95Γ), as does leather armor.

;Armor (in steel)

* Plate armor weighs 1177.5Γ
* Chain armor weighs 588.75Γ
* Greaves weigh 471Γ
* Leggings weigh 314Γ
* Gauntlets weigh 392.5Γ (pair)
* High boots weigh 314Γ (pair)
* Low boots weigh 235.5Γ (pair)
* Helms weigh 157Γ
* Shields weigh 392.5Γ
* Bucklers weigh 117.75Γ
* Caps weigh 78.5Γ

;Weapons (in steel)

* Battle axes weigh 628Γ
* Spears, maces, hammers, and crossbows weigh 314Γ
* Short swords weigh 235.5Γ
* Bolts weigh 23.55Γ each

Consult the figures in [[#Material weight and protection|material weight and protection]] for weights of the above items when made of other materials, or [[Armor#Weight]] for additional figures. For the curious, the "base weight" of any of the above items can be found by dividing by 7.85 (steel's weight multiplier).

{{Military FAQ}}
[[Category:Military]]

Bloodline:Succession League Members

2009-10-09T16:38:13Z

Karl: /* Members* */

Members of the [[Succession League]].

=Members*=
{| border="5"
|+'''Member Info'''
|-
! Nickname (order joined)
! [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php Bay12 Forum Name]
! Activity
! League Games
! Ability Rating
! Personality Rating
! Punctuality
! Games Completed
|-
| [[User:The Architect|The Architect]]
| The Architect
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| Arkaine (11)
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| Barbarossa the Seal God (2)
| style="color:orange"| November09
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| [[User:Briess|Briess]] (10)
| Locriani
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| Chewykittens (5)
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| Dante` (7)
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| [[User:Karl|Karl (13)]]
| Karl
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| [[User:Kilakan|Kilakan (3)]]
| kilakan
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| killaconcarnage(4)
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| Linthar (12)
| style="color:green"| Available
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| [[User:Morinon|Morinon]] (6)
| Dead Winter Reigns
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| [[User:Sava2004|Sava2004]]
| sava2004 (1)
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| Tack (8)
| style="color:green"| Active
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| N/A
| TauQuebb (9)
| style="color:green"| Active
| 1
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
| N/A
|}

*''This will soon include statistics for members, and will remain alphabetical. This is largely a democracy and anyone wishing to implement new ideas such as "titles" (founder, veteran, rookie, etc) should discuss it in the [[Talk:Succession League Members|Discussion]] page. If you don't like your statistics, they can be Reset. If your statistics REALLY don't like you (stats come from fellow players), then YOU may be Reset(suspended from the League). Only extreme behavior on the level of repetitive vandalism (in game and on here) will warrant this. See [[Succession League Policies|Policies]]

Bloodline:SL Survival Challenge

2009-10-09T04:33:01Z

Karl: /* Current Game */

=The Survival Challenge!=
''Run by'' [[User:The Architect|The Architect]]

back to [[Bloodline:Succession League Games|Games]]

==Current Rules==
New goals/Awards added, Rules updated.

From the Forum:
 No maximum # of players. Just ask to be added to the competition! It ends the 29th of October. You may restart as many times as you like until you survive the Spring, after that you're locked in. If you die at a later time, the honest thing to do is admit defeat and wait for the next playthrough.

 Awards for:
 Sheer Style
 Smiter: Evil population control (bonus if you somehow manage to attract and kill a mega in this time period, bonus for style such as outdoor flooding traps, balista chutes, etc)
 "Noble Aspirations": Have the largest and best-satisfied nobility, with style!
 MegaConstruction
 Merchantilism: Most Wealth
 Popularity: Population count minus dead
 North Korea: self-destruct switch, taking out the enemies with you!
 Military: pretty self-explanatory. Kill, up close and personal! traps are for cowards!
 Defender of the Peace: Don't allow merchants to die (will be damn near impossible, i know) or provoke war with human/elven civs
 Ronald McDonald: Food/farming
 Woody Allen: Wood-related production (with an unsafe surface? good luck!)
 Hell on Earth: clear out the HFS! Bonus for style!
 ePITome of Power: clear the Chasm or Pit first. Bonus for least citizens lost to pit residents.
 Gobbler: Clear the Goblin Towers first. (N/A)

 Depending on how awards are completed, you may attain multiple awards, for instance should you clear the goblin tower fast and not lose too many dwarves, while doing it face-to-face (not using traps) you may qualify for the Gobbler, Popularity, AND Military awards.
Not sure how to determine winners for food production and wood production yet. Artifacts aren't the product of your skill and will be excluded from your scores; however a legendary dwarf who made the artifact will certainly boost you if you keep him alive!

Post your economic stats, population and deaths, monster kills, and merchant deaths for the first year on the linked forum asap, so that our Leaderboard can be updated.

==Current Game==
[http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=42977.0| Collecting players on the Forum] 
Kinakin seems to have found the perfect map, and a link will be posted asap. 
{| border="5"
(+'''Year 1 Stats'''
|-
! Players
! Wealth
! Popularity
! etc
|-
| [[User:The Architect|The Architect]]
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| Chewykittens
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| [[User:Karl|Karl]]
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| [[User:Kilakin|Kilakin]]
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| kurokikaze
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| Linthar
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| rosedrake
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| sava2004
| N/A
| N/A
|-
| TauQeubb
| N/A
| N/A
|}

To be modified

==Map==
http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=1476

The search parameters are

X dimension 4

Y dimension 4

Savagery High

Evil High

Temperature Medium

Flux Stone Yes

River Yes

Underground Pool Yes

Bottomless Pit Yes

Other Features Yes

all other are N/A

==Past Games==
We are on our first game.

Bloodline Talk:SL Survival Challenge

2009-10-09T01:52:08Z

Karl: /* Bloodline namespace */ Not needed anymore

=General=
Tell everyone what you think about it.

=Map Selection=
Magma, underground rivers, etc. Chasm hoped for, Terrifying necessary.

Succession League Archive

2009-10-08T23:01:51Z

Karl: moved Succession League Archive to Bloodline:Succession League Archive: to put it in the same namespace

#REDIRECT [[Bloodline:Succession League Archive]]

Bloodline:Succession League Archive

2009-10-08T23:01:51Z

Karl: moved Succession League Archive to Bloodline:Succession League Archive: to put it in the same namespace

This is the archive of completed games in which members played and rated their fellow players. Games links are moved here when they become inactive or are completed.

Bloodline Talk:SL Survival Challenge

2009-10-08T18:09:23Z

Karl:

=General=
Tell everyone what you think about it.

=Map Selection=
Magma, underground rivers, etc. Chasm hoped for, Terrifying necessary.

=Bloodline namespace=
You might want to move that to the bloodline namespace, that way, people not interested in the bloodline games can filter them out of the recent change or search. Since you do a lot of modification, it's literally flooding the [[Special:RecentChanges|recent changes]] page. On a unrelated side not, you could specify what version of dwarf fortress you are going to use for this game, and the mod, if any. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 18:09, 8 October 2009 (UTC)

40d Talk:Cross-training

2009-10-07T15:00:43Z

Karl: /* Forest Gulag */

=Pump operator notes=
Not sure the toughness note is really that important. The gym is just used for dwarven stat gains, so dwarves are beefy enough to excell at whatever you throw at them. It scarcely matters how well they pump, just so long as they get to Legendary to be reassigned to the military or something else. I've noticed gym graduates make fantastic hunters for example. --[[User:ThunderClaw|ThunderClaw]] 17:47, 3 November 2008 (EST)

:Well, it makes pump-training far more effective for dwarves that are already tough: they can hit legendary in a season or two, where other dwarves take about a year. So if you have a finite number of dwarves you can spare for training, choose tough ones. Strong ones can be put in plate and made to spar, or turned into siege operators.

:Currently I'm training all my haulers, in shifts. Ones that gain toughness get to keep pumping until they're ready for the military. Strong ones get stone hauling duty. Everyone else gets food, item, or refuse duty.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 20:06, 3 November 2008 (EST)

:: I now give all my haulers the custom profession ''ROTC.'' --[[User:RomeoFalling|RomeoFalling]] 07:50, 8 November 2008 (EST)

::: I've been trying cross-training, and I'm not really seeing much point at the moment. The thing is, sparring practices three skills ''at the same time'': Armor user, the weapon you're using, and shield user. The gym's rate of stat gain is almost the same as regularly sparring dwarves. And military dwarves are useful for something. [[User:Greep|Greep]] 09:05, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

::::The "point" is several - 1) that some players don't want to put non-Attribute (or at least, non-Tough) dwarves directly into sparring; 2) that some players want military with more than "one-skill-worth" of training attributes under their belts; 3) that some players want to see what the attribute mix is on a dwarf ''before'' allocating to training (vs hauling/etc); and, 4) it's ''cross''-training. Military dwarves aren't useful for anything ''but'' military - that's the "cross" part. There are several suggestions other than pump operator - use them or not - your call. --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 18:39, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

:::::Alright, I guess gym training just isn't for me. But as for the one skill worth of attribute training, I thought attributes continued to rise even after legendary + 5. Like an uber miner would eventually gain 16 attributes? That's what the stat page seems to indicate [[User:Greep|Greep]] 06:16, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

If you make two pumps, one above the other (Y axis, not Z), facing apposing directions, dig 2 channels at each end, making a 2X8 space, you can not only increase toughness and pump operator skill, but get happy [[waterfall]] [[thoughts]]. --[[User:Drunken dwarf|Drunken dwarf]]

=Dwarf Powered Mill notes=
Actually, it is better not to cook seeds. As seeds have quantity cap at 200 seeds for each plant, milling will not produce seeds after you hit the cap. It saves a visible amount of food hauler's work. [[User:Denspb|Denspb]] 02:58, 25 February 2009 (EST)

== Managing ==

Assigning a dwarf to manager may be even better than clerking. I had two useless dwarves. Assigned one to clerk, another to manager+broker. Disabled hauling jobs for the manager. I then went to the manager screen and queued up a full screen of "Make Soap x30." I chose soap because I don't even have an alchemist's workshop and I didn't want any jobs assigned to existing workshops and disrupting work flow. I lost track of how many times I had to go back in and cancel/re-issue the soap orders. The manager reached legendary while the clerk was still a pathetic high master. I didn't measure steps, but their offices and bedrooms were all very close together, should be around 5-10 steps difference for each dwarf to go get food/drink.

Other factors:
 -Clerk has a husband (no kids), manager is single
 -Clerk went on break at least once
 -Hauling was still enabled for the clerk, not sure if she did any jobs though
 -At the beginning, Clerk had no skills, Manager had Normal Skill Wood Carving (not much good on my treeless map)
 -Manager met with human diplomat and traded at depot during training

--[[User:Mjo625|Mjo625]] 17:18, 2 March 2009 (EST)

== Chit-chatting ==

Having no meeting halls (well rooms, statue gardens etc) at all, and just having a single 1x1 meeting area REALLY boosted my haulers stats. I might not be the most efficient assigner of work orders, but some of the time most of my haulers were out of work and just spent their time at the meeting area chatting. I had a lot of proficient-or-higher in EVERY social skill within a couple of years. This might be an exploit. Thoughts? [[User:Tardface|Tardface]] 22:53, 3 April 2009 (UTC)

: Yes and no. Chatting dwarfs make friends... and if some dies... Well, you'll have a nice domino effect. Dwarf don't like to lose friends. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 23:12, 3 April 2009 (UTC)

:: So, dwarves will actually be happier overall if you don't let them have any friends? :) [[User:Tardface|Tardface]] 23:15, 3 April 2009 (UTC)

:::In the long-run (which inevitably includes many random deaths) yes.. very much so. Rather few, are the fortresses that can survive a death among legendary haulers, and fewer still are those than can survive several. --[[User:N9103|Edward]] 21:06, 4 April 2009 (UTC)

::::Not really. Random deaths are not exactly inevitable unless you want them to be, and party forts are pretty resilient when it comes to a couple odd deaths: everyone is racking up "talked to a friend lately" thoughts like crazy, so even if a few deaths push them down to miserable they will bounce back up to ecstatic in about a minute. The danger is that if you have more than a couple of deaths at once, the immediate surge in unhappiness may cause spontaneous insanity, which will lead to more deaths... [[User:Rpb|Rpb]] 11:09, 5 April 2009 (UTC)
:::::Thoughts don't stack on themselves, so you can only get one "talked to a friend recently" thought at one time. The wisdom of having dwarves too busy to make friends is still the best, hands down. --[[User:ThunderClaw|ThunderClaw]] 16:53, 13 July 2009 (UTC)

== Swimming ==

Has anybody considered stationing dwarves in an area with 4/7 water, thus giving them skill in swimming? Beds could be constructed in this area prior, turned into a barracks and if a food/booze stockpile is placed there aswell, the dwaves could be locked in there and would then perform all the normal sparring activities while at the same time constantly gaining swimming skill. --[[User:Overspeculated|Overspeculated]] 00:13, 26 September 2009 (UTC)
:I successfully trained dwarfs in 7/7 water before. I filled a 5x5 space one z level down from a 15x15 statue garden with water and surrounded with ramps. Although the dwarfs frequently fell in, they were never far away from the sides and thus never drowned. (Although a cow managed to drown there and create quite a funk with the miasma since no one would wade in to dump the corpse--I'm still not sure how that happened since the dwarfs had no problem with it.) [[User:3lB33|3lB33]] 01:19, 26 September 2009 (UTC)
Yes, but would military dwarves still perform sparring activities if their barracks was 4/7 under water? (where they can wade or swim) eventually raising that level once they are good enough at swimming. I'm testing it out as soon as I get my flooding mechanism done (I'm still new to this game so that takes quite a while for me) --[[User:Overspeculated|Overspeculated]] 12:58, 26 September 2009 (UTC)

== Forest Gulag ==

I have set my fortress in an area with:
# volcano
# steep "low mountain" (entrance is on top of course)
# sand
# canyon (like "Grand Canyon")
# chasm (on the "wrong side" of the Grand Canyon thankfully)
# A forest covers my side of the "Grand Canyon"
# Elephants wander through periodically, and I have some tame ones now too.

What I want to know is, what is the best way to use the forest to build experience. I'm happy to clear-fell the forest then start again from the beginning, but the fact is I am having a hard time so far keeping the wagon pathway clear as it is. I NEED MORE AXES! (getting there.)

For my non-woodcutter dwarves: what should they do with the lumber to get the most experience without making junk all over the place?

Do I make a stack of asherys, to make potash, to make clear glass "later"?
[[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 11:04, 27 September 2009 (UTC)

:Given the lack of answers to date my best bet seems to be:
:#clear-fell forest
:#Construct carpenter workshop from wood. Assign workshop to not lower skilled carpenters.
:#Build wooden weapons usable for weapon traps
:#have other dwarves constructing mechanisms
:#construct weapon traps using wooden weapons
:[[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 10:35, 7 October 2009 (UTC)
::Alternatively, if you're planning on making lots of clear glass, you can make all of the ashes into lye - you can fit 100 units of lye in a single barrel, which saves lots of storage space. Plus, you can also use the lye for making soap, if you are inclined. --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 12:54, 7 October 2009 (UTC)
::You can't build wooden weapon. Only the elves have the secret to build them without hurting trees... Damn hippies. Yet you could build menacing wooden spikes or stuff like that... but... Wood only do half damage, so it's a waste of wood and your trap are not going to be really effective. You could instead do it with glass, a lot more step needed to have the same result, but it's way more fun, and you can build a lot of stuff from clear glass.
:: Since there's a limit to the number of tree you can fell, and since they don't grow fast enough (if you have 5-10 good woodcutters) you should had more step in the process to use a lot of dwarf, hence the clear glass production.
:: By the way, obsidian and wood make good rock sword, and it's as good as steel, if you have access to water, you could build an obsidian farm. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:00, 7 October 2009 (UTC)

File talk:FoR.jpg

2009-10-06T01:44:06Z

Karl:

I don't get it...--[[User:Frandude|frandude]]
:Something about the fellowship of the ring, if you are in the Tolkien universe. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 01:44, 6 October 2009 (UTC)

40d:Easter eggs

2009-10-04T14:08:59Z

Karl: Then maybe not, new version of the game might bring new easter egg too.

:''Hidden Fun Stuff redirects here. It can also refer to... well, [[glowing pit|do you really want us to spoil it for you]]?'' It is also used in the [[dev logs]] to refer to anything Toady doesn't want us to know about until we find it ourselves.

This page is a list of hidden or unexpected aspects of the game.

=== Fluctuating Subtitle ===
When [[Your first fortress|starting up the game]], on the title screen where the player first chooses what to do, the top reads:
Slaves to Armok: God of Blood
Chapter 2: Dwarf Fortress
Histories of ...
'...' will be generated each time the game is opened. Some combinations include "Histories of Avarice and Resourcefulness" and "Histories of Jealousy and Tenacity." Generally, the words will include a synonym each of "greed" and "stubbornness", which as we all know fit the hairy little blighters like a [[Cave spider silk]] [[Clothing#Articles|glove]].

=== Dwarven Daydreams ===

Some dwarves like Toads for their beauty, an obvious inside reference to [[Toady One]].

=== So What If I'm Dead? ===

Checking the [[weather]], temperature, or [[Calendar|date]] in [[Adventure Mode]] after dying will instead return a snarky message reminding you of your current medical state.

=== Bey@nd Quality?! ===

For about one frame, the word "Beyond" in the Bay 12 Games Beyond Quality intro turns into "Bey@nd". Nobody knows why.

=== Oink! ===

In the Bay 12 Games Beyond Quality intro, when the program is saying "Quality", grab the title bar and drag it around a bit. Release, and when the lines appear, you'll hear a pig sound.

=== Help Screen ===

If you press the ? on the help screen you will go to the help screen of the help screen, now press it twice more :-)

=== Intro Movie ===
Not quite an easter egg, more a spoiler: The final scene of the intro might well be a HFS.

{{Expand Topic}}

40d:Hauling

2009-10-01T15:20:40Z

Karl: /* Tips and issues */

'''Hauling''' is the process of bringing an object to its designated place. There are several specific types of hauling, based on the type of item(s) to be hauled and determined by designating the specific [[labour]]s on indivual dwarves.

Although not a term found in-game, '''hauler''' generally refers to a dwarf in [[fortress mode]] who has no labors enabled other than '''hauling'''. Once the [[dwarven economy]] starts, haulers are usually the poorest in the fortress as the hauling task only pays 1☼ per task completed. In large fortresses where there may be great distances for haulers to travel, individual hauling tasks may take a long time to complete, and so very little money is earned. Haulers are good candidates for [[cross-training]] to help improve their strength and agility [[attributes]], which are important attributes for moving heavy objects across a fortress quickly.

Many larger fortresses use dedicated dwarves to do much of the hauling so that other, more specialized dwarves will spend more time in their [[workshop]]s and less time dragging raw materials or finished products to the appropriate '''[[stockpile]]'''.

== Automatic hauling ==
Some hauling tasks do not require any hauling [[labor]]:
* A dwarf working at a workshop will gather the raw materials needed to produce wanted goods. However, produced goods require the appropriate hauling [[labor]] to be moved out of the workshop in order to avoid [[clutter]]. Dwarves producing goods at a workshop tend to keep producing them and will not necessarily clear their own workshops of clutter even when they have the appropriate hauling labor enabled.
* All dwarves, including [[noble]]s and [[children]] (but not [[soldier]]s) will bring goods to the [[depot]].
* A [[mood|moody]] dwarf will gather the raw materials needed for a mysterious construction.
* A dwarf {{k|b}}uilding something will move the needed materials to the construction site.
** Before a dwarf will build something, he will need to have the appropriate labor as specified by the task. If the dwarf is building a chair or similar, the dwarf needs Furniture Hauling; if the dwarf is building a wooden wall, it's Carpentry, and so forth. Workshops are usually constructed by any dwarf that can work in that workshop.
* Dwarves in the midst of eating will carry their meal to a table. Military dwarves, however, will eat directly off of the floor.
* Removing constructed objects will be done by all dwarves.
* Filling pits and ponds will be done by all dwarves.
* If you have the "All dwarves harvest" option turned on, all dwarves will help bring in the harvest, even if they don't have Food Hauling enabled.

== Stone hauling ==
Dwarves with the stone hauling [[labor]] enabled will haul [[stone]]s, [[ore]]s, [[gem]]s and stone [[block]]s to the appropriate [[stockpile]]s.

Note: Dwarves, being the kind fellows they are, practically insist on hauling one of the farthest stones into your stockpiles. They tend to ignore eligible, nearby stones 'for the greater good of the fortress'. This selfless act often results in terribly long journeys, carrying just one stone. See the section on [[Stone management]] for tips on combatting this problem.

== Wood hauling ==
Dwarves with the wood hauling [[labor]] enabled will haul wood [[log]]s to the corresponding [[stockpile]]s. <s>Deforestation</s>Wood production can be sped up a lot by turning off wood hauling on your most skilled [[woodcutter]] who will focus exclusively on cutting down trees. This will however expose more of your dwarves as many wood haulers will go outside to retrieve the logs.

== Item hauling ==
Dwarves with the item hauling [[labor]] will haul miscellaneous items like blocks and collect [[sand]] for a [[glass furnace]].

== Food hauling ==
Dwarves with the food hauling [[labor]] will haul food and drinks to the appropriate [[stockpile]]s.

== Refuse hauling ==
Dwarves with the refuse hauling [[labor]] will haul rotting food, and non-dwarf bodyparts to refuse [[stockpile]]s. They will also [[dump]] marked items to the appropriate [[activity zone]]. Refuse hauling are subject to refuse orders (''{{k|o}}: Set Orders and Options -> {{k|r}}: Refuse Orders'').

== Burial ==
Dwarves with the Burial [[labor]] will haul dwarf and pet [[corpse]]s and bodyparts to [[Graveyard]] [[stockpile]]s or [[coffin]]s.

== Furniture hauling ==
Dwarves with the furniture hauling [[labor]] will haul [[furniture]] to the appropriate [[stockpile]]s. They will also '''{{k|b}}uild''' simple furniture items ([[bed]]s, [[chair]]s, [[table]]s, etc.).

== Animal hauling ==
Dwarves with the animal hauling [[labor]] will haul [[animal trap]]s and occupied [[cage]]s to the appropriate [[stockpile]]s. They will also drag any creature to the [[restraint]] or [[activity zone]] to which it was designated.

== Tips and issues ==
In order to minimize hauling trips, stockpiles should be placed with care.
* Input and ouput stockpiles should be placed near corresponding [[workshop]]s.
* Spoils of war: dwarves may haul entire bins full of items, or items individually. However, they are not smart enough to bin items in order to carry them, so this may end in numerous needless trips from deceased enemies to your fortress, each dwarf carrying one item at a time. To counter this:
** Place a small [[bin]] stockpile and a general purpose stockpile near the battlefield.
** When every spoil has been binned, remove the stockpiles, mark the filled bins for dumping, deactivate your usual garbage zone and create a new one in your fortress.
** When everything has been moved, reclaim your dumped items and restore your garbage zones as usual.
* Construction preparation: when constructing something big away from your fort (e.g. a road), the dwarf assigned to the construction will have to carry each item from your fort to the construction location, which can take a long time. By putting stockpiles near your construction project, many dwarves may participate in the hauling, thus dramatically increasing construction speed. Note that materials are allocated at the time of building, so be sure the stockpile is filled before placing the construction order, otherwise the materials will still have to come from afar.
*Consider specializing your haulers if possible - food haulers that orbit around the kitchen/dining room/farm area, stone haulers that orbit around the mines and furnaces, and (if possible/needed) wood haulers that do likewise with the carpenter shop. Turn off refuse hauling if that dwarf isn't going to be near areas likely to have refuse. This keeps the mine hauler from deciding to walk aaaallll the way over to the kitchens for one load, and then out to the forest for one, and then back to the smelters, and so on.
*Furthermore, you can handpick your specialized hauler, selecting them by their attributes. A wood hauler might be chosen because of his agility since he might have to walk a lot of tile to reach the forest, depending on the fortress and map layout. If the biome is evil, a bit of strength and endurance might help him survive the harshness.
*The [[Grower]] profession can have a ''huge'' impact on hauling - see [[farming]] for a discussion.

=== Backlogs ===
To ensure that high-priority hauling tasks (like food, to clean up after get done quickly, you should employ a large number of haulers, and specialize them by having only one or two hauling [[labor]]s enabled. This is most important for food hauling, where [[prepared meal]]s in the [[kitchen]] often rot while your dwarves are hauling individual seeds left behind after someone eats a plump helmet, or if your hunters bring a herd of animals in for your [[butcher]]s all at once.

The backlog problem is exacerbated by the fact that the hauling [[job]] queue is tied to how many haulers of each type you have; if 100 dwarves have food hauling enabled, up to 100 food hauling tasks can be in the queue, even if those dwarves are busy hauling stone, doing workshop tasks, sleeping, or doing anything else.{{verify}} This is why hauling specialization is so important.

=== Two stockpiles are better than one ===

For stockpiles that use [[bin]]s or [[barrel]]s, it is usually better to cut one large stockpile into a handful of smaller ones. This is because dwarves will only load one bin or barrel at a time, and may go idle for long periods while they wait for the next-chosen bin or barrel to actually get hauled to the stockpile before they can load it. By using several smaller stockpiles, haulers can retrieve and fill multiple bins or barrels simultaneously.

[[Category:Skills]]

User talk:Quietust

2009-09-29T20:20:05Z

Karl: /* statues */

Quietust (Talk | contribs) (actual character)
Actually, there is no single "actual character" for a bottomless pit - there are two "default" sets of icons for vanilla DF, the ascii and the included tile set. The character I get is like a very thick capital O, but a little boxy. It's certainly not a "o". --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 21:50, 31 July 2009 (UTC)

Wonderful, *now* I found out there's a second purple stone after having already made a giant rose gold tomb... I guess I should of looked closer first, man was that a waste of gold. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 01:07, 9 August 2009 (UTC)
*To be fair, you can usually find gold nuggets in much larger quantities than bismuthinite (since the latter only occurs in small clusters)... --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 04:03, 9 August 2009 (UTC)
::Yeah, but I had such better uses for it, like making coins. Yes, we definitely needed more coins. But I know I had found far more bismuthinite on that map than I had gold, then again, I was turning the bismuthinite into bismuth bronze, so I wasn't going to give that up any time soon either. Honestly I should of just not made a giant purple tomb. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 04:43, 9 August 2009 (UTC)
Holy crap! That aluminum=platinum is huge! I had been playing all this time just assuming that aluminum was cheap (since it is in the real world.) Is there any way we can make this bigger? Noobs need to know about this.

== no soap? ==

Soap needs an alchemist's lab, which needs 3 glass flasks - Are those ''ever'' available from caravans? I thought "No, so no sand = no flasks = no lab = no soap" - no? Never spec needed glass flasks from caravans, so dunno.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 21:51, 4 September 2009 (UTC)
*It's fairly well known that you cannot request glass or sand from caravans, so yep - no sand == no soap. --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 22:35, 4 September 2009 (UTC)

== crop table ==

I didn't redesign the table. I brought back a previous design since the recent one was too obscure. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 12:04, 5 September 2009 (UTC)

== Alluvial vs soil ==

Good find. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 01:36, 11 September 2009 (UTC)

== salt water ==

the above paragraph already explains how to verify whether or not it is drinkable)
Yes, but it doesn't emphasize the need to not assume you did it correctly. That line was not a redundant "how to", but "make sure you do". The whole issue of a well that was non-drinkable (which worries me as well, re your recent edit) was that the player did not pay close attention.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 22:03, 23 September 2009 (UTC)
*I've readded a statement to basically advise double-checking, though my own testing revealed that a built well works fine for thirsty dwarves, whether from a murky pool or right at the shore itself. It's possible that it's the Z-level of the well that determines whether or not it works - placing a well in an underground cistern might not work as well as one placed on the surface... --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 23:03, 23 September 2009 (UTC)

== statues ==
Why would it only be more efficient with [[copper]], [[silver]], [[gold]], [[platinum]], and [[aluminum]] ? --[[User:Birthright|Birthright]] 19:54, 29 September 2009 (UTC)
: Most of the other metal are alloy I presume, so impossible to use the raw stone. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 20:20, 29 September 2009 (UTC)

40d Talk:Clothing

2009-09-28T20:03:22Z

Karl: /* masterpiece disentigration */

== masterpiece disentigration ==
Does masterpiece clothing disentigration still cause the maker to get all pissy over it?

If so, then it needs to be added to the article. --[[User:Heliopios|Heliopios]] 13:31, 1 December 2007 (EST)

I've seen a few artifact articles of clothes in the game, but I have never seen anyone wear them. It could be that the game avoids this question. --[[User:Mirthmanor|Mirthmanor]] 20:24, 18 August 2008 (EDT)

My clothing industry has been running nonstop with 7 dwarves for many years (at least 10). They are all legendary or very nearly there in every clothing ability (besides strand extraction). At this point I've gotten 4 or so 'lost masterpiece' messages concerning my clothing dwarves, particularly the two who got legendary first, via artifacts. It would be extraordinarily improbable for a kobold thief to make it in and out of my fort undetected (my meeting area is in the 3 wide entrance, so a thief has to make it in when nobody happens to be there, which never seems to happen, what with 25+ hungry mouths and the aristocracy up to and including the queen) -- and it would say 'theft' not 'lost' anyways. I believe the only reason I haven't received many more such messages is because the dwarves aren't putting on the masterwork clothes -- I guess they don't see a point in being non-nudist in a desert.

A related question is whether one would get multiple unhappy thoughts from a masterfully dyed, woven, and sewn article of clothing disintegrating. Or, for that matter, masterfully encrusted as well (gem encrusting has quality, right?). --Wyriel
:Perhaps your dwarves doesn't have enough money to wear masterpiece clothes, so not a lot of them wears and tears out. As for the related question, I do not know at all. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 20:03, 28 September 2009 (UTC)

== mass-produce? discard old clothes? ==
I would like to see something on which clothes players should mass-produce to keep their dwarves happy. I'm really not sure myself. [[User:Mindsnap|Mindsnap]] 15:37, 6 December 2007 (EST)
: I second this request. Do dwarves automatically discard old clothes? It seems that my dwarves are buying new clothes at the stores, but then they still wear there old rotting trousers. --[[User:Mitchy|Mitchy]] 11:01, 9 January 2008 (EST)
::In my experience they would discard old socks and boots, but will wear a dosen rotting dresses at once. Maybe some inv slots have limit on the clothes number, and some not? [[User:Dorten|Dorten]] 23:11, 9 January 2008 (EST)
: I recall a post on the forums that said it's best not to produce clothing at all, and start a dwarven nudist colony. That method is a simple solution that prevents unhappy thoughts from accumulating. I don't think it maximizes happiness, though, as Dwarves get happy thoughts from making satisfying acquisitions. [[User:Non|Non]] 03:50, 5 February 2008 (EST)
:: No good idea. Not having clothes gives an unhappy thought for every separate piece of clothes missing. --[[User:Koltom|Koltom]] 16:00, 18 February 2008 (EST)
:::not so. dwarves get(used to, removed this version) an unhappy thought for LOSING each piece of clothing, but once its gone(or if they started with none) there is no unhappy thought. they are perfectly fine and happy being naked, once the sadness of rotting clothes wears off --[[User:Chariot|Chariot]] 18:30, 18 February 2008 (EST)
:::: I once had the thought "XY was embarrassed to have no shirt lately". cant swear if he had one before that thought or not, but dont rotting clothes give a different thought "emb. about...clothes rot away"? It still might be that he gets that thought only once. --[[User:Koltom|Koltom]] 18:56, 18 February 2008 (EST)

== Artifact Cave Spider Silk Thong ==

All right, given that you probably ''are'' going to make exotic underwear with cave spider silk... couldn't it at least be something that the dwarf who made it was going to ''wear'' rather than something which is rare for humans?

Oh well, when my clothier passes over I will have something fantastic to sell which is also very light I guess![[User:GarrieIrons|GarrieIrons]] 21:47, 2 February 2008 (EST)

== Why bother? ==

Am I missing something? Is there any reason at all to provide new clothes for dwarfs? --[[User:Shadow archmagi|Shadow archmagi]] 09:27, 28 February 2008 (EST)
:You mean other than the fact that if old clothes start to rot the dwarf wearing said clothing gets an unhappy thought? I highly doubt that's been removed since the last version I was semi-familiar with. --[[User:BDR|BDR]] 13:52, 28 February 2008 (EST)
:: Ah. Well, I built a HUGE dining room. Its taken two years to fully smooth it, but now any dwarf who eats instantly becomes either ecstatic, happy, or, if they're whole family was killed and they had to sleep on the ground by the rotting corpses, they might just be content. Wow, writing that once again reminded me how totally R rated this game would be if it were 3d. --[[User:Shadow archmagi|Shadow archmagi]] 16:04, 28 February 2008 (EST)
::BDR- it was taken out in the latest release because of problems. Once it works right, Toady said he was going to bring it back, but for the current version and immediate future, clothes are just a waste of effort.--[[User:Erom|Erom]] 16:36, 28 February 2008 (EST)
::: Here I have a massive clothing industry sitting idle, unemployed dyers starting fights, and dear Toady is off figuring out how many ribs dwarves have and whether skin can be flayed. My civilization yearns to be built on green silk cravats, not the torturer's arts. :) --[[User:Jellyfishgreen|Jellyfishgreen]] 17:17, 17 November 2008 (EST)
::Well, there's still the awesome value of having your dwarves swank around in fancy clothes. Plus adamantine clothes provide more protection than most pieces of more conventionally-manufactured plate-level armour if I'm not mistaken, which might prove worthwhile if you happen to strike adamantine and only have legendary clothiers.--[[User:Quil|Quil]] 17:40, 17 November 2008 (EST)
::Hahaha, I have to note here that there is one very, very practical reason to give your dwarves clothes: If it's cold and they have body parts exposed, they will freeze, and the nerve damage from this is permanent. My glacial fortress suffers from chronic brainfreeze epidemics in babies and soldiers, and they don't even get to eat any ice cream. --[[User:Navian|Navian]] 17:45, 17 November 2008 (EST)

== Frequency ratings ==
How common is common? It seems like every goblin invasion has had about 4 or 5 iron masks, about 50% of goblins, so it doesn't seem like they are that uncommon. Is this on the threshold of uncommon? Do others get this many masks? [[User:Dangerous Beans|Dangerous Beans]] 07:11, 2 August 2008 (EDT)

:Well, I've been playing for a couple months, and I've never seen one. So, uh, maybe it's something to do with the specific culture of the goblin civilization that's attacking you. --[[User:Zombiejustice|Zombiejustice]] 14:01, 2 August 2008 (EDT)

::That would make sense, I might start a new fortress else where, and see if I get as many. [[User:Dangerous Beans|Dangerous Beans]] 01:56, 3 August 2008 (EDT)

== Separating ==

Is there anyway to separate dwarf-sized clothing from goblin & kobold sized clothing? I've been messing with my stockpiles, but can't seem to sort them out. [[User:HeWhoIsPale|HeWhoIsPale]] 10:14, 5 September 2008 (EDT)

:I've been working under the assumption that the {{key|u}} usable and {{key|j}} unusable toggles on many of the stockpile pages provide this functionality. I ''think'' it works, but I generally don't really pay that much attention to such matters... --[[User:Raumkraut|Raumkraut]] 11:59, 5 September 2008 (EDT)
::Clothing appears to be sorted as a "finished good" though, which doesn't have those toggles. [[User:HeWhoIsPale|HeWhoIsPale]] 08:56, 8 September 2008 (EDT)

==Coats Anyone?==
I can't seem to make coats in the latest version (.40d) in either clothiers or leatherworkers, and I haven't seen a dwarf start with a coat in this version yet. Anyone know what's going on? --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 14:36, 25 November 2008 (EST)

:I've had no problem with that in 40d. They wear coats when they arrive (unless they're wearing a robe instead), I can produce them, and they'll put on new coats if their coat or robe wears out.

:There used to be a note somewhere that not all forts/civs can produce the same clothing. Maybe that's what's at work?--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 18:02, 25 November 2008 (EST)

::The possible types of clothing for civs are in the entity_default.txt file, and are selected for each individual civ (or site, even, not sure) in that 'finalizing uniforms' step near the end of world gen. I'm not sure if the climate of the civilization's cities has any effect on this determination, but they definitely will have a limited selection instead of being able to make anything on the entity_default list. --[[User:Navian|Navian]] 17:39, 26 November 2008 (EST)

== Seperating Dwarves from Rotten Clothing ==
I noticed my dwarves' clothing was wearing out, and started using all that nice fabric I'd been buying from the elves for years to replace it. My dwarves don't seem to care all that much... Some of them have picked up a few new things(no economy) but none of them have ditched any of their old stuff. I have dwarves wandering around wearing three pairs of socks, two ruined, one not. I even tried marking stuff for dumping but they don't give a damn; maybe I don't have to if they don't, but it bugs me. How do I get rid of the ruined clothes? --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 15:55, 10 December 2008 (EST)

:[[!!]]?--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 17:48, 10 December 2008 (EST)
::Killing everyone with fire would destroy the clothing, yes. But would also kill everyone with fire. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 00:38, 12 December 2008 (EST)
:::Yeah, I know. But I enjoyed typing it all the same. ;-) --[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 02:24, 12 December 2008 (EST)

:Only way to do this is to mark their stuff for dumping. They'll then realize they're naked and will (eventually) go buy/obtain new clothes. I know exactly how you feel, my Captain of the Guard was getting negative thoughts from having her clothing fall apart and I kept wishing she'd just go replace her outfit. She was still ecstatic, but when a dwarf with maxed out stats that's a legendary Pump Operator, Wrestler, Marksdwarf, and Hammerdwarf gets negative thoughts, I get worried no matter what the circumstances are. --[[User:ThunderClaw|ThunderClaw]] 13:43, 12 December 2008 (EST)

::Marking items owned by a dwarf for dumping does not cause them to dump the item. In fact, if the dwarf owns it you have no control over what they do with it. Similarly, they will ignore any attempts to forbid the item and continue wearing them. They will, however, put on new clothes over their rags, which should stop them from being naked when the old ones disintegrate. --[[User:Squirrelloid|Squirrelloid]] 15:07, 12 December 2008 (EST)

::Interesting. This means the Hammerer, when he arrives, does not own his Hammer, since you can dump it. :) "Tool of the state" indeed. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 14:13, 19 December 2008 (EST)

:::I think you might be wrong Squirrelloid, I use dumping to change armor all the time. If you Dump then forbid the item at the same time then they wont dump it because they aren't allowed to interact with it. Double check to make sure you just dumped the item.--[[User:Mrdudeguy|Mrdudeguy]] 05:01, 23 May 2009 (UTC)

::::Dwarves do not own their armor. Dwarves will never dump or stockpile an object that is owned by one of your dwarves. [[User:VengefulDonut|VengefulDonut]] 13:50, 23 May 2009 (UTC)

:::Do they still get negative thoughts from wearing decaying clothing? I haven't seen any in 40d. I used to see such thoughts a lot back when I was heavy into the 2D version.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 21:43, 12 December 2008 (EST)

==Is there ANY difference?==
there seem to be many redundancy between types of clothing. EG:
Pants, Skirt, Short skirt, Long skirt all fill the same functional roll.
now I can understand Pants vs Skirts for flavor reasons, but does the type of skirt do ANYTHING?
This problem exists for many categories. Please help me understand.--[[User:Mrdudeguy|Mrdudeguy]] 05:06, 23 May 2009 (UTC)

: Nope, no difference. Its pretty much like real life in that respect. Why would you expect a long skirt to do something different then a normal or short one? [[User:Lando242|Lando242]] 12:40, 27 May 2009 (UTC)

::Eeem..have you been to real life lately? A short skirt can make a '''huge''' difference ;) Who knows, maybe it already affects DF romances XD --[[User:Birthright|Birthright]] 21:32, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

::: Really? The two inch difference between a short DWARF skirt and a long DWARF skirt hugely matters? Remember their legs are only like 2 feet long };-). Anyway, yeah, its just a flavor thing, variety is the spice of life and all that. [[User:Lando242|Lando242]] 21:37, 22 June 2009 (UTC)
::::Now i could be boring and point out that a smaller person also puts more weight into smaller differences, but meh - i'll just say good riposte ;) --[[User:Birthright|Birthright]] 23:00, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

User talk:3lB33

2009-09-28T15:16:52Z

Karl: /* Cheese! */

== Cheese! ==

Just wanted to let you know that I laughed so hard I terrified my cat at your image. --[[User:Briess|Briess]] 13:32, 28 September 2009 (UTC)

It's [[Media:DF_Cheese.jpg|destined to be a classic]]. [[User:3lB33|3lB33]]

We need more awesome stuff like that ! --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 15:16, 28 September 2009 (UTC)

40d Talk:Trading

2009-09-28T12:43:45Z

Karl: /* D hotkey removed in .40d? */

{{Archive|
# The [[Talk:Trading/Talk Caravan|talk page]] from Caravan, which wasn't merged properly at the time.
# The [[Talk:Trading/archive1|first archive]] of Talk:Trading.
}}

== Dead Wagons on Depot Deconstruct Exploit ==

You can take every item from a caravan by deconstructing a depot while the caravan is in it. The items aren't marked as stolen if you do this. But in the units screen, any wagons that were in the depot will appear as deceased. It's because the trader's wagon is a creature. Specifically, it's the center tile of the wagon. That's why the Depot Access view only shows where the center tile of the "wagon" can get to. I'd kind of like to point this out here, or perhaps on the page specifically about wagons, to identify the difference between the trade wagons and your starting wagon, which is a building.

Also, Dwarves still won't siege you, and this particular exploit can make the game ridiculously easy if you only deconstruct on the Dwarven caravan.--Kydo 02:48, 25 September 2009 (UTC)

:That exploit is already discussed in this article. And the distinction between embark wagons and trade wagons has (also) already been made clear on the [[wagon]] page (which the key word most users would Search for, I'd think - and where I'd think we should be having this discussion?) If you want to put a footnote in that article, so long as it isn't adding more confusion than clarification (that is, it doesn't devolve into pointless detail and supposition), more info can't be a bad thing.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 15:03, 24 September 2009 (UTC)

::Well, the wagon article seems to focus almost exclusively with the starting wagon, and only mentions the trade wagons once. In fact, reading over it again, it only mentions trade ''caravans''. Nothing about the wagons therein, or the distinction. Still, I agree with you that this is more about the wagons than about that exploit, and the conversation should be over there, not here.--Kydo 02:48, 25 September 2009 (UTC)

== Culling on mandates ==

what's that? in the trade screen? me no be native speaker...--[[User:Koltom|Koltom]] 21:56, 20 February 2008 (EST)
:I think it means that it will hide things that are not allowed to be traded: "Mayor has put bans on certain exports". But I don't know if it hides an entire bin if one item in it is banned. [[User:Hex Decimal|Hex Decimal]] 14:29, 27 February 2008 (EST)
::I am quite sure that "culling on mandates: on" hides all bins containing items which have active Noble Export Bans. [[User:Samyotix|Samyotix]] 09:16, 13 November 2008 (EST)
:::I made a "trading color cues" subsection. This should cover relevant info about mandates and other things. --[[User:Shurikane|Shurikane]] 22:07, 29 December 2008 (EST)

== Trading flowchart ==
{{:Trading/Flowchart}}
Given a number of questions on the forums, it may be a good idea to put together a flowchart of the steps involved in trading. I will draft something up here (at least partially so I can safely screw up my first attempt on this wiki)

Tasks are sequential top-to-bottom, but can be done in parallel left-to-right
{|cellpadding="2" border="1" width=400|
|-
| colspan=2 rowspan=2| Make or obtain goods to trade || Build Depot ({{K|b}} - {{K|D}})
|-
| Ensure Depot is accessible ({{K|D}})
Check green area reaches edge of map
|-
| colspan=3 | Wait until a caravan arrives on the map
"A--- caravan from --- has arrived."
|-
| Set goods to be traded ({{K|q}} - {{K|g}}) || Request a trader ({{K|q}} - {{K|r}}) || Wait for caravan to reach the depot
"Merchants have arrived and are unloading their goods"
|-
| Wait for goods to be hauled || Wait for the trader to finish their other tasks and go to the depot || Wait for the rest of the caravan to reach the depot and be unloaded
|-
| colspan=3 | Begin actual trading ({{K|q}} - {{K|t}})
|}

Hmm. Is there a better way to show this? It may not help much as is... [[User:Kaypy|Kaypy]]
:Ask and ye shall receive (see right, editable at [[Trading/Flowchart]]). --[[User:Juckto|juckto]] 08:46, 6 May 2008 (EDT)
'''Re: Adeptable's changes''' I don't think the third branch is neccesary. For one, it makes it seem too wide, and secondary it implies that turning off the trader's labours ''all the time'' means that trading will happen faster - almost as if it will make merchants arrive more often. --[[User:Juckto|juckto]] 23:36, 2 August 2008 (EDT)
:I'd add retrieving empty bins to the bottom so that you don't end up with empty bins sitting at the depot. When stockpiles are crowded you'll need them to deal with the sudden influx of goods. (Never give away bins!) I bow to your wiki-fu, I simply could not edit your flowchart... --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 14:15, 3 December 2008 (EST)
::Yeah, it's a bit tricky I guess. It's all in the colspan :p. But, ahhh, how do you retreive them? I thought dwarves would automatically fetch empty bins from the depot if they needed them, just like fetching them from any other location. --[[User:Juckto|juckto]] 18:31, 3 December 2008 (EST)
:::Ack, somehow didn't see this. Empty bins will still show up as Trading in the bring goods to depot menu, unmark them and your dwarves will haul them back to where they're needed. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 02:13, 7 January 2009 (EST)
::::Surely the bins' "Trading" status disappears after the Trader leaves? I mean, I've never noticed them as still being marked for "Trading" when the next caravan arrives next season. --[[User:Juckto|juckto]] 22:08, 23 January 2009 (EST)

 

== How many wagons? ==

I don't think I've ever seen more than 8 wagons in a given caravan. Is that the limit? Has anyone ever seen more than 8?--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 03:01, 9 November 2008 (EST)

:I've never seen more than two at a time before flooding my fortress. I didn't realize they could send more than two at a time. Kydo 14:20, 24 September 2009 (UTC)

== Mass selection of goods to be moved ==

Question: Is there a way to designate multiple goods in one selection to be brought to the depot?

I'm getting really tired of indivually selecting goods to be moved to the depot when I have massive amounts of crafts, food, etc. So is anyone familiar with ways to select multiple goods at once? Maybe a "start" and "end" tags (for lack of a better name) and every good caught inbetween is designated to be moved to the depot? -- [[User:Dakira|Dakira]] 14:47 10 November 2008 (PST)

:Nope. About the best you can do is use the select (search) menu to get all the ones of the type you want, then enter-down-enter-down. You can flag about 200 a minute this way, though.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 19:17, 10 November 2008 (EST)

::That's what I was doing previously. Are there any plans for a "mass selector" to be introduced? -- [[User:Dakira|Dakira]] 16:50 10 November 2008 (PST)

:::Not that I know of. Make a feature request on the [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php forums].--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 20:05, 10 November 2008 (EST)

::::AFAIK, there is no good way to do this from the trade screen, which is why it's important to set up custom stockpiles and have plenty of bins. Man, I really wish you could make bins out of stone.
:::::Auto Hotkey thingy. Heard it works wonders. Never tried it though.--[[User:Zchris13|Zchris13]] 15:19, 10 April 2009 (UTC)

== Merchant moods ==

My fortress hadn't been doing too well, but I didn't know it was so bad it could affect merchants... and their pack animals. As the last merchant was about to leave the map, he suddenly went berserk and was cut down by his bodyguard, who then fled the scene. Shortly thereafter, I recieved a message that the donkey had been stricken by melacholy. Has anyone else had this happen?

:They usually eventually go nuts if they can't leave for some reason. Never heard of something like what you're describing.--[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 03:24, 12 November 2008 (EST)

== No more dwarven caravan ==

So. The Dwarven caravan has not come in the past two years. I think, though I am not sure, that this corresponds with when I met the requirements for the Incoming King, though he has not yet seen fit to arrive. I believe I also capped the population sometime in there, but I think it was after the first year of no caravan. I don't recall in any way molesting previous caravans. I needs me some dolomite and steel bars, anyone know what's going on here? --[[User:Zombiejustice|Zombiejustice]] 02:10, 13 November 2008 (EST)

:So. I upper the population cap to encourage some immigration, and after a few seasons, the King showed up with his retinue and the Hammerer, who had apparently died at some point. I re-capped the population, and the caravan came next autumn. Was it the incoming king or the dead hammerer? Did the population cap interfere with the king's arrival? The mystery remains. --[[User:Zombiejustice|Zombiejustice]] 14:59, 2 December 2008 (EST)

::I'm on year 13 of my most recent fortress and the Dwarven caravan declined to show up this year, after 12 years of no problem. I still don't meet the requirements for the Incoming King. In a previous game I did meet those requirements, and that did not interfere with the caravan (though the liason stopped letting me place orders once the king arrived). Anyway, I don't think my current fort has anything in common with what you've described, other than a mysteriously missing caravan after not damaging previous ones. --[[User:Sev|Sev]] 00:52, 7 January 2009 (EST)
:::It appears my problem was caused by a brief goblin siege that occurred when the caravan was supposed to be showing up. --[[User:Sev|Sev]] 16:48, 26 January 2009 (EST)

== A query from the deleted page Talk:Stealing ==

I've read many times that the traders count their total losses/profits when they leave the edge of the map, so as to make stealing of any sort impossible (to get away with, anyhow). Does this include what the guards are carrying (if they get killed or even just shoot off some bolts)? Or is the "total profit" concept true at all? --[[User:Maximus|Maximus]] 17:07, 27 November 2008 (EST)

:I'm pretty sure that the total profit concept is how it works. The value of everything the traders enter with is subtracted from the value of everything the traders leave with to calculate profit. There's probably something in there to account for the death of (a) trader(s). --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 21:42, 28 November 2008 (EST)

::is this still true? i was unwittingly stealing everything off the merchants via the stocks screen. i dont have any steel yet, as i've not found any flux or iron ore. but every now and again, i noticed i had a bunch of steel/iron weapons/bolts/armo(u)r, so designated it all for melting, etc, etc.. eventually, i chose to 'dump' everything to see where they were getting it, and they were stripping the merchants of all their goods/clothes/everything metal xD will they come and siege me anytime soon? my army's not ready yet! i do give good profit margins (20%+), but i'm sure the stuff i nick is much more valuable :/ --[[User:DJ Devil|DJ Devil]]

:::I've noticed that starving dwarves appear to be happy to steal food from merchants. I'm running 0.28.181.40d, and, being new to this, almost experienced [[fun]] due to lack of food. The dwarven caravan arrived in the nick of time, and rather to my surprise once they got close a clump of dwarves started hobbling their way over to the caravan. Once they got to it they started following it back to the depot (at full speed, not sure why), and then made off with a plump helmet each once the merchants started unpacking. Obviously food is rather less valuable than steel, but theoretically this too could tip the merchants into loss if you didn't buy much, assuming that profit/loss accounting is done this way. --[[User:Jenesis|Jenesis]] 19:01, 17 April 2009 (UTC)

== Wagon movement ==

I'm pretty sure that wagons cannot move diagonally. --[[User:Savok|Savok]] 20:08, 11 December 2008 (EST)

They can, it just requires 7 tiles instead of 3 --[[User:Nightwind|Nightwind]] 04:08, 1 May 2009 (UTC)

== Arrival dates ==

Out of curiosity, has anybody given a closer look at the exact arrival dates of trade caravans? Do they always arrive at a fixed time, or does it hover inside a certain period during the month or season? --[[User:Shurikane|Shurikane]] 22:11, 29 December 2008 (EST)

:I've kept track over about 5 years. The Dwarf caravans seem to arrive around the 15th or 16th of Limestone and leave about the same time in Sandstone. The Human caravans seem to arrive around the 12th to 14th of Hematite and leave in Malachite. I don't have any data yet for the Elves. Once I get some more data points, I'll edit the wiki to add this info. --[[User:Mithra|Mithra]] 17:11, 17 April 2009 (UTC)

:: Here I've got elves arriving the 11th of Granite. [[User:Timst|Timst]] 09:14, 3 May 2009 (UTC)

::16th of hematite for humans here. 40d. Elves 11th too --[[User:Höhlenschreck|Höhlenschreck]] 10:53, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

::They're supposed to leave one month to the day after they arrive - that's the same day number, next month. For me, I've seen dwarf caravans arrive as early as the 10th, and as late as the 17th (but usually toward the first part of that, 10-12th). (Usually right after the first dogs whelp, but that's from the Growers Almanac.)--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 11:24, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

==Wagons and magma==
A dwarven trade caravan passing over a magma channel on its way to my trade depot recently caught fire. Naturally, this caused lots of [[fun]], but I'm a bit perplexed by it. There was nothing flammable on the bridge - in fact, the magma beneath was 1/7 deep at best - but it looks like the wagons just spontaneously combusted as they passed over the stream. Can anyone confirm that it was the magma that caused this, or were the children just playing with matches again? [[User:Aosher|Aosher]] 08:07, 14 January 2009 (EST)

== Elven Caravan Wood Logs ==
I noticed there was a "verify" next to "carries more wood the less trees you cut down" under the Elven Caravans and am not sure if it is right or not. Can anyone confirm this? I have observed the stock of wood brought by the elves in two games as increasing significantly with time. In one of the games wood was scarce, in the other wood was plentiful but to dangerous to cut down and in both I would consistently buy out all of the wood logs from every caravan. So I had theorized the increase in the number of logs brought was related to demand conveyed by buying out the stock repeatedly for years. However, not cutting down trees and buying out all the wood logs would tend to go hand in hand. Also, to really see a significant increase in a specific item I would need to buy out all the wood stock from a caravan for close several years. It is possible that both the demand and level of "production" of wood determine how much is brought. If either is true for wood, then it might be true for other items that Elves bring. Also, did I format this thing right? --[[User:Pencilinhand|PencilinHand]] 8:47, 23 January 2009 (EST)
:In my experience it's something more like - the more you have in stock, the less they bring. I was buying out all logs from them, and they brought ~120 logsevery year, and I chopped a lot of trees, but used them fast. Then I built some wooden machinery (axles, windmills), my stocks always showed about 100 logs in them after that, and elves began to bring only about 5 logs...--[[User:Dorten|Dorten]] 04:48, 23 January 2009 (EST)

::I did a series of experiments over a period of 3 years in my current fort and can confirm that Dorten is right and my previously stated theories are wrong. A forts stockpile of wood appears to be the biggest factor in determining how much wood is brought by the elven caravans. When I had a stockpile of 51 wood logs the elves brought no wood, when I had a stockpile of 0 wood logs they brought 43 wood logs, similar results were observed regardless of if I was cutting down trees during the year(though I did not test any clear cuts). The other caravans may have brought more wood as well, but further testing is needed before I am confident in that statement, as it may have been caused by offerings/gifts. --[[User:PencilinHand|PencilinHand]] 17:10, 25 January 2009 (EST)
:::I've done some of my own testing and have found that '''all''' caravans follow this behavior - the less wood you have, the more caravans will bring. The trick is that with the human and dwarven caravans, the excess can be limited or eliminated outright if you've requested them to bring enough specific goods to reach their weight limit - if you go a year without making any requests, they'll bring tons of wood logs. An interesting way of manipulating this further is to simply '''forbid''' all of the logs in your fortress before the caravan arrives - doing this, I've made the elves bring nothing but wood when they would otherwise bring their typical goods (tested with save backups as well). Incidentally, actually requesting wood logs via the liaison doesn't really help much, since a maxed out request only makes them bring '''4''' logs of each type (which is near useless with the dwarves). --[[User:Quietust|Quietust]] 05:47, 15 September 2009 (UTC)

==Trade Depot Color==
I know this doesn't have anything to do with trading, but it is interesting. Since Trade Depots are made out of 3 stones (or logs etc etc), if you combine stones of various colors, what do you get? I tried combining Orthoclase (yellow), Kimberlite (blue) and Olivine (green), and I got a green depot. Then I tried Gabbro (black) and 2 Orthoclase, and the depot was yellow. Kimberlite, Petrified Wood (red) and Olivine, the depot was green. Does anyone know how the color is selected?

:As far as I understand is the last stone for the color (or was it the first one?) --[[User:NobbZ|NobbZ]] 10:50, 23 February 2009 (EST)
::I'll have to fire up the game again when I get home, but I could have sworn that I've occasionally wound up with two-tone depots when I've used different stones. The main part was one color while the corners were another. But maybe I'm just imagining things. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]] 09:49, 5 March 2009 (EST)
:::I just built a trade depot out of 3 Orthoclase (yellow) and it turned out where about half of it was yellow and half was white. Not like a two tone either, just blotches of yellow and blotches of white... [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 04:11, 7 August 2009 (UTC)
::::Sounds like that might be a screen (or eye) problem. [[User:Arkenstone|Arkenstone]] 16:43, 19 August 2009
:::::No... It's nothing like that. It's where different "block" of the Trade Depot appeared different colors. So, like some parts would have yellow blocks in it, where other parts would have white blocks. So... like...

WWWYW 
WWYYY 
WWWYY 
WWWWY 

But not exactly that, I can't remember the exact design of it. [[User:Shardok|Shardok]] 01:05, 20 August 2009 (UTC)

== stealing animals ==

One of the objects I happened to cheat the game of was a nickel cage with a dog in it. on the units page, the dog was still shown to belong to the traders. Is there any way to change this? (or at least any [http://www.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fun fun] to be had from this?)

: What happens when you [[kennel|train]] it into a war dog? or, for that matter, does the game recognize it as an animal that can be [[kennel|tamed]]? --[[User:FJH|FJH]] 15:15, 25 March 2009 (EST)

==Buggy behavior with sieges==

In my current game the dwarven caravan arrived, followed immediately by a goblin siege. I crushed the siege but a couple caravan guards and a pack animal were killed. A handful of merchants, guards and animals got stuck at the edge of the map, and I never got to trade, even though all the wagons made it safely into the depot. I was however able to make the usual arrangements with the liason. Then I got the message that the caravan was leaving but they didn't actually go. Has anyone else experienced anything like this? Any way to fix it? --[[User:FunkyWaltDogg|FunkyWaltDogg]] 23:43, 29 March 2009 (UTC)

:In case something like this happens to anyone else, I found that digging out the area under the stuck merchants and collapsing it fixed the problem. The survivors started moving off the map and the wagons immediately pulled out of the depot. --[[User:FunkyWaltDogg|FunkyWaltDogg]] 05:20, 31 March 2009 (UTC)

== Limited Caravan Accessiblity ==

Contrary to the comments in the section on wagons, I do not believe you can force a caravan to enter the map at a specific point. Running 0.28.181.40d, I build a wall so that there is only one entrance to the map that is accessible to the depot. Humans arrived from another point of the map, and I got the message "Their wagons have bypassed your inaccessible site." I do see 'Depot accessible' on D. --[[User:Sfogarty|Sfogarty]] 05:49, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
:As for my experience, game first chooses the side of the map for traders, and then checks if wagons can reach depot. I had to chop trees yearly to keep fortress accessible before I've build a road. However, it can be not side but embarking tile that is chosen before accessibility check, but I haven't done any experiments to validate if it is the case. --[[User:Denspb|Denspb]] 10:19, 10 April 2009 (UTC)

== lazy dwarves ==

I just had a Human Caravan.

None of my dwarves did anything. Not a single mug or gem or meal was moved to the depot. I had to disable my broker's labours- ALL of his labours- to get him to speak with the diplomat following him about like a lost puppy.

Now, I see a 'priority' setting function in the Manager. Would this be practical or even usable to set Depot requests high?

== Attacked caravan slowed down - bug? ==

All right, I was in my third or so year. Autumn came and the dwarven caravan showed up - along with a Goblin ambush. Naturally the two fought in front of my fortress (with some strategic ranged support from my marksdwarves). Of the three wagons, one was destroyed (phat lewt!). Thing is, once the Goblins were taken out of the pricture one of the wagons moved *very* slowly - slow enough, in fact, that it didn't even get into the trading depot before I got the message that the caravan was going to leave soon. The wagon froze at the edge of the depot, two steps shy of getting into position, and then they both just sat there - I never even got the option to trade with them :-/ Has anyone else encountered a similar issue or did my game just have a bout of cranial flatulence?

: I have seen my caravan ambushed by goblins (killing the ambush) and then retreat... No trade this season. I guess this kind of behaviour should go in the main page [[User:MathFox|MathFox]] 17:43, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

::It seems that when you request a large amount of heavy (literally) goods, the wagon (which actually counts as a creature that hauls items) might become encumbered and move very slowly. It might even be unable to reach the trade depot before the merchants leave, especially if the map forces it to move along a long path between trees. I might wrong, this needs testing. [[User:Mateusz|Mateusz]] 16:19, 5 September 2009 (UTC)
::''(Moved from [[bug]] main article by --[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 18:11, 5 September 2009 (UTC))''

== requested items ==

Any time I request specific items... the next caravan turns up with exactly 1 of each item and nothing else.

So I get caravans turning up with a total of say 6 items.

Any suggestions?[[User:GarrieIrons|GarrieIrons]]
:Not sure. Maybe it depends on the actual availability of said items? In one game where I played in a pretty barren area and I asked my dwarven traders to bring lots of wood and they brought like 60 something of it the next season. When asking for meat, they bring plenty of it as well. What are you trying to request though? I requested some flux stone once and only got 6 flux stone rocks.--[[User:Smjjames|Smjjames]] 12:35, 29 May 2009 (UTC)
::example: various types of leather - I got 1 of some of the types.
::I think maybe I didn't send out enough value last time and I may have just made the same mistake. I'm trying too hard to get "value".[[User:GarrieIrons|GarrieIrons]] 06:32, 30 May 2009 (UTC)
:::I also suspect it has to do with the avialability at the mountainhome - i get huge loads of requested wood, meat and specific types of leather, but bit coal, lignite, pig iron, steel bars and charcoal always only come in small amounts like, 6, though still more than when i do not request them (zero :( ) --[[User:Höhlenschreck|Höhlenschreck]] 20:20, 19 June 2009 (UTC)
::::It is of course also limited by the total capacity of the caravan. In the first two years its easy to "push out" all the crap they normally bring with requests. Later they will bring everything, and more of, what you request, but still not necessarily "much".. --[[User:Birthright|Birthright]] 15:23, 23 August 2009 (UTC)

== Merchant turned friendly ==
Bug or feature? A macedwarf that came with the caravan lagged a bit behind when leaving and stopped 2 tiles from the border. When i checked with 'u' he had turned friendly. Now he's standing there guarding.. --[[User:Höhlenschreck|Höhlenschreck]] 20:16, 19 June 2009 (UTC)
:This happens whenever the merchants have all left and soldiers are left over. He will leave eventually. --[[User:Birthright|Birthright]] 15:19, 23 August 2009 (UTC)

== Forbidden Items? ==

I've never had green glass items refused by Elves, on my current or any other map. My main export to everyone is green glass goblets on any map that supports cheap glass. I don't need wood for them but then, I didn't think the trading system(or the elves, for that matter) was sophisticated enough to tell. --[[User:Corona688|Corona688]] 19:21, 30 June 2009 (UTC)

== Error ==
I just had my first time ever true crash of DF - right on arrival of human caravan i got a message smth like "fatal error: nemesis failed to load unit". What does this mean and how do i find out if this is a known bug and where do i report it if not? --[[User:Confused|Confused]] 12:27, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
:Okay, google was my friend. For some odd reason all the files accompanying world.sav were gone, that causes this error. --[[User:Confused|Confused]] 16:09, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
::C - you're on the forums - you haven't ever heard of this? See [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=34936.0| Nemesis Errour]--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 18:51, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

== Self-Deconstructing Wagon? ==

I had a human caravan enter my map, and right where they entered was a group of bonobos. I was accustomed to the caravans plowing right through animals with no consequences, but this time, the wagon exploded as it touched the bonobo. The wagon was nowhere to be seen afterward, just all the trade goods it was carrying (in addition to one kapok log, which I suspect the wagon was built from). The rest of the caravan promptly ran away. The only thing I had built there was a rock block road. Has anyone else had anything like this happen, and if so, under what circumstances? --[[User:King of the Internet|King of the Internet]] 00:35, 11 August 2009 (UTC)

:That happens when a wagon is killed, all of the goods fly out, the Bonobo probably attacked it, and the rest of the traders always run away if a caravan is destroyed.--[[User:CrazyMcfobo|CrazyMcfobo]] 01:42, 11 August 2009 (UTC)

:I had this happen to me too. A caravan arrive just as a bunch of Orcs did. I wasn't watching, but they must have toasted one wagon and the caravan fled off the map. It was frustrating for two reasons. First, being on the very edge of the map, the clean up was terrible, and second, all the items dropped were marked as stolen.[[User:Kwieland|Kwieland]] 15:54, 11 August 2009 (UTC)

:So should it be noted on the page that normally-passive animals can attack the caravan, sending everyone back home? --[[User:King of the Internet|King of the Internet]] 21:22, 15 August 2009 (UTC)

== D hotkey removed in .40d? ==

I tried to see which paths the caravan could take using D: nothing came up, and it's not on the hotkey menu.

Edit: Nevermind, it's back. Don't know where it went. @_@
: You need a trade depot so you can use the command. As soon as you'll order to build a trade depot, you can use it. It'll be all red, until the trade depot is constructed. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 12:43, 28 September 2009 (UTC)

Dwarf Fortress Wiki talk:Improvement Drive

2009-09-24T12:11:17Z

Karl: /* Advertisements */

== Advertisements ==
Instead of pursuing this kind of thing, why not go with paypal and ask for donation? I'm curious, why are you forking that much money for a simple wiki ? 60$ a month seems a lot. Could you provide stats about bandwidth usage and stuff like that ? --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 22:59, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

I'd rather not ask for donation, as I feel if the ads are focused properly, they shouldn't be too intrusive and more than cover the bills. Also, we have the issue that since this is on my company's server, the hosting provider is technically the company I co-own; as that is the case, donations to a company raise all kinds of weird legal issues that I'd rather not spend time trying to figure out. Ad units are legally able to be accounted as "revenues," so it makes it significantly simpler to just go with that. If I had a cheaper server that could handle the load, sure, I would move it there - unfortunately, I tried that, which resulted in about an hour of downtime yesterday. Oops.

Once my company is making enough money that it's no longer draining money from my savings (and is paying me, instead of me paying it), I'll gladly and quite quickly drop the ads.

Server usage statistics:
*3gb downstream / day used on average (peak: 3.3gb)
*322mb upstream / day used on average (peak 7.4gb, but I was uploading some stuff not related to the wiki)<
*Apache stats: (only the wiki is using Apache, and it's set to manage new instances of apache based on load)
*Average: 7 instances of Apache running at 2.0% processor utilization each, 20 mb of memory each
*Peak: 22 instances of Apache running at 3.2% processor utilization each, 23 mb of memory each

The above are moving averages. [[User:Briess|Briess]] 23:12, 18 September 2009 (UTC)
:Do you have any stats on, the amount of traffic from wikignomes like me who hang around and mess with articles, vs n00bs the wiki actually thinks it is here to help? I guess that "logged-in vs IP" would be the easiest stat to look at, how much that gets rid of editors who don't automatically log in I don't know.
:Re: the adds, I personally find it funny to get ads for real-world "Rock Retaining Walls" by visiting a wiki about a game in which your @'s build, rock retaining walls. How to target that is an amusing problem for someone. The ads don't bother me at all though - but obviously no adds would be nicer.
:Maybe if you disabled the ads for users with more than.... 500 edits (ie, me!)?
:I'm all for a project to improve articles BTW, sign me up.[[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 03:46, 19 September 2009 (UTC)
:: I don't have access to stats like that, as unfortunately Mediawiki was not designed with that level of logging detail in mind. Best I can do is estimated time on pages in particular namespaces. [[User:Briess|Briess]] 05:57, 19 September 2009 (UTC)

: did you tweak your appache setting so you could use maybe a bit less bandwidth ? Mainly compression on the fly ? Else... I was looking at some redundant template, like the rocks template, you have ~700bytes of inline CSS. Not a lot by itself, but every bytes count when you want to save bandwidth. It could be easy to add classes and CSS rules in a file that will be cached anyway. There's some compression tools for Javascript and CSS files that could give you a couple kbytes too. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 11:29, 23 September 2009 (UTC)
::Karl's got a good point, I just looked at the site stats using YSlow and noticed a few things that might help and should be easy (in theory) to do: 1. Add expires headers: this means that browsers won't be constantly reloading files that aren't changed much like many of the graphics files and script files. Having an expiration date of about a week or two is often enough to drastically improve bandwidth. 2. Compress components with gzip (or deflate.) This is easy to do in IIS but I don't know how easy it is to do in Apache; I've only dabbled in Apache before. [[User:3lB33|3lB33]] 13:41, 23 September 2009 (UTC)
::: It was on the todo list; and is now done. The primary cost of the server hosting is not in bandwidth, but is instead in memory and cpu usage. However, I want to try to keep all page serves under 500 ms. [[User:Briess|Briess]] 07:57, 24 September 2009 (UTC)
:::: I must say, I'm really curious about what kind of hosting solution you might have. If you have to pay by memory/cpu time, you might want to tone down the compression setting or remote it instead, since compression always use more cpu time. One thing is sure, the caching will probably help a lot --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 12:11, 24 September 2009 (UTC)

== Non-vanilla ==

o Should we include a link to Mayday's graphical compilation on the main page? The default tileset can be more than intimidating for some.

The problem is that MM's download is far from vanilla, and conflicts rear up regularly with newbies who have downloaded that and then refer to this wiki - which isn't the same interface in many respects. If we were to do something like that, we'd want to approach it with those problems in mind.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 23:24, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

* Makes sense. The only gameplay differences I can recall off the top of my head are the stone control mod and the 'cat cancels store item in stockpile: too injured' 'fix'. What other changes are there that we would need to account for? [[User:Briess|Briess]] 23:30, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

== Verify this ==
* Verify Time! 
o Category:Verify has a lot of stuff we need to verify.
To "verify" sometimes requires "more research", and sometimes that research is either obscure, time consuming, random, tedious or a combination of the above. Do we need it? Yeah. Are we excited about it?... <looks around>--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 23:24, 18 September 2009 (UTC)
* True. Once I get a few upgraded wiki modules up though, I'll probably start cracking at it. [[User:Briess|Briess]] 23:29, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

Dwarf Fortress Wiki talk:Improvement Drive

2009-09-23T11:29:10Z

Karl: /* Advertisements */

== Advertisements ==
Instead of pursuing this kind of thing, why not go with paypal and ask for donation? I'm curious, why are you forking that much money for a simple wiki ? 60$ a month seems a lot. Could you provide stats about bandwidth usage and stuff like that ? --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 22:59, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

I'd rather not ask for donation, as I feel if the ads are focused properly, they shouldn't be too intrusive and more than cover the bills. Also, we have the issue that since this is on my company's server, the hosting provider is technically the company I co-own; as that is the case, donations to a company raise all kinds of weird legal issues that I'd rather not spend time trying to figure out. Ad units are legally able to be accounted as "revenues," so it makes it significantly simpler to just go with that. If I had a cheaper server that could handle the load, sure, I would move it there - unfortunately, I tried that, which resulted in about an hour of downtime yesterday. Oops.

Once my company is making enough money that it's no longer draining money from my savings (and is paying me, instead of me paying it), I'll gladly and quite quickly drop the ads.

Server usage statistics:
*3gb downstream / day used on average (peak: 3.3gb)
*322mb upstream / day used on average (peak 7.4gb, but I was uploading some stuff not related to the wiki)<
*Apache stats: (only the wiki is using Apache, and it's set to manage new instances of apache based on load)
*Average: 7 instances of Apache running at 2.0% processor utilization each, 20 mb of memory each
*Peak: 22 instances of Apache running at 3.2% processor utilization each, 23 mb of memory each

The above are moving averages. [[User:Briess|Briess]] 23:12, 18 September 2009 (UTC)
:Do you have any stats on, the amount of traffic from wikignomes like me who hang around and mess with articles, vs n00bs the wiki actually thinks it is here to help? I guess that "logged-in vs IP" would be the easiest stat to look at, how much that gets rid of editors who don't automatically log in I don't know.
:Re: the adds, I personally find it funny to get ads for real-world "Rock Retaining Walls" by visiting a wiki about a game in which your @'s build, rock retaining walls. How to target that is an amusing problem for someone. The ads don't bother me at all though - but obviously no adds would be nicer.
:Maybe if you disabled the ads for users with more than.... 500 edits (ie, me!)?
:I'm all for a project to improve articles BTW, sign me up.[[User:GarrieIrons|Gar]][[User Talk:GarrieIrons|rie]] 03:46, 19 September 2009 (UTC)
:: I don't have access to stats like that, as unfortunately Mediawiki was not designed with that level of logging detail in mind. Best I can do is estimated time on pages in particular namespaces. [[User:Briess|Briess]] 05:57, 19 September 2009 (UTC)

: did you tweak your appache setting so you could use maybe a bit less bandwidth ? Mainly compression on the fly ? Else... I was looking at some redundant template, like the rocks template, you have ~700bytes of inline CSS. Not a lot by itself, but every bytes count when you want to save bandwidth. It could be easy to add classes and CSS rules in a file that will be cached anyway. There's some compression tools for Javascript and CSS files that could give you a couple kbytes too. --[[User:Karl|Karl]] 11:29, 23 September 2009 (UTC)

== Non-vanilla ==

o Should we include a link to Mayday's graphical compilation on the main page? The default tileset can be more than intimidating for some.

The problem is that MM's download is far from vanilla, and conflicts rear up regularly with newbies who have downloaded that and then refer to this wiki - which isn't the same interface in many respects. If we were to do something like that, we'd want to approach it with those problems in mind.--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 23:24, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

* Makes sense. The only gameplay differences I can recall off the top of my head are the stone control mod and the 'cat cancels store item in stockpile: too injured' 'fix'. What other changes are there that we would need to account for? [[User:Briess|Briess]] 23:30, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

== Verify this ==
* Verify Time! 
o Category:Verify has a lot of stuff we need to verify.
To "verify" sometimes requires "more research", and sometimes that research is either obscure, time consuming, random, tedious or a combination of the above. Do we need it? Yeah. Are we excited about it?... <looks around>--[[User:Albedo|Albedo]] 23:24, 18 September 2009 (UTC)
* True. Once I get a few upgraded wiki modules up though, I'll probably start cracking at it. [[User:Briess|Briess]] 23:29, 18 September 2009 (UTC)

40d:Siege engine

2009-09-20T22:49:07Z

Karl: /* Ballista battery */

A '''siege engine''' in Dwarf Fortress is half building/half heavy weapon, and includes both the '''catapult''' and the '''ballista'''. Both are formidable weapons of tremendous range ''(more than a screen-width, perhaps 100 tiles for a catapult and around 150 for a ballista)'' and capable of dealing out horrendous damage. A [[ballista arrow]] will possibly kill or cripple each and every common creature in its path indiscriminate of friend or foe, and can severely injure even a [[dragon]], and anything unlucky enough to be hit by a falling catapult stone is likewise in for a world of hurt.

Once constructed, they can be instantly turned 90 degrees in any direction, but cannot be moved - they can, however, be deconstructed back into their 3 parts, to be used elsewhere individually or together. Both the manufacture of the parts and the construction of the engine itself require a dwarf with the "Siege Engineering" [[labor]] designated and use the "[[Siege_engineer|Siege Engineer]]" [[skill]], as does the manufacture of ammo for the ballista (and the de-construction of any engines, if desired).

The player determines when/if each engine is actively firing or not; when active, a single engine is crewed by a single [[siege operator]]. Ballistae require specially made [[ammo]], [[ballista arrow]]s, made from wooden [[log]]s at the siege workshop (and optionally tipped with [[metal]] [[ballista arrowhead]]s that have been made at a [[forge]] by a [[weaponsmith]]). Catapults use simple [[stone]] as ammunition.

==Building Siege Engines==

In order to build a siege engine, you first need to produce (at least) three catapult or ballista parts in the [[Siege Workshop]]; catapults are made from any 3 '''catapult parts''', and ballistae are made from any 3 '''ballista parts'''. All parts are made from any type of wood at a [[siege workshop]]. Beyond that, "parts" are generic - there are no particular "sub-types" of parts beyond the distinction between those for the two different engine types. The quality of the parts determines the overall rate of fire and accuracy of the engine - the best are made with 3 masterwork parts. This won't make up for an untrained siege operator, but every little bit helps.

Once you have the parts, you may then build the respective siege engine like any other building, selecting the parts that you wish to construct that particular engine with. It is not known whether the skill of the [[dwarf]] assembling the siege engine has any effect, but the [[quality]] of the parts certainly has: siege engines put together from [[quality|masterpiece]] parts have a much higher rate of fire and accuracy.

The assembled siege engine is, effectively, a 3x3 building. It cannot be moved about other than by taking it down and re-assembling it at the new site. Siege engines do not impede movement, though, so you don't have to worry about building them in a corridor.

==Using Siege Engines (simple)==
{{key|o}} will let you change the orientation, whether the siege engine is pointing north / south / east / west. This takes effect immediately, it does not require a dwarf to come and turn the engine.

{{key|f}} toggles the current status between:
*Not In Use: [[Dwarves]] with the [[Siege operator]] [[job]] will reload unloaded engines and leave them unattended.
*Prepare to Fire: Siege Operators will load the engine and remain stationed for further commands.
*Fire at Will: Siege Operators will fire and load normally.

Once an engine is given orders to fire (or prepare to), a dwarf with the [[siege operating]] labor designated will respond and report to the engine. The dwarf(s) will (re-)load any siege engine that is not currently loaded; there's no way to prevent this short of disabling the labor on all dwarves or forbidding every piece of ammo (or otherwise blocking a [[path]] to it, perhaps by locking [[door]]s.)

[[Ammo]] is usually destroyed upon being fired, unless it falls a z-level.

########
CCC..._#
CCC..._#
CCC..._#
########

The [[channel]] at the end of this firing range preserves the stone. For catapults there is usually so much spare stone that this is not necessary, but it could be used for fast stone transport, or simply to set up a self-contained training area. A similar effect can sometimes be observed when firing a catapult over bumpy ground outside.

The design can be further improved by using a [[drawbridge]] rather than a wall, this way when the drawbridge is raised it acts like a wall deflecting the stone into the channel below. In the case of an attack on your [[fortress]] the drawbridge can be lowered allowing the catapult to fire.

#####################
CCC..._¦.............
CCC..._¦.............
CCC..._¦.............
#####################

Drawbridge raised deflecting stones into channel.

#####################
CCC...[].............
CCC...[].............
CCC...[].............
#####################

Drawbridge lowered allowing catapult to shoot down the corridor.

==Special considerations==

* Both catapults and ballistae have narrow fields of fire - they will only shoot at creatures basically "in front" of them, and so cannot target anything off at an angle. They can be turned 90 degrees, but that often will not solve the problem. (The field of fire is perhaps only 10-20 degrees wide. Wild shots may go (well) beyond this, but those are not aimed.)
* Both catapults and ballistae aim and fire only along one z-level. While ammo from both may drop down z-levels, they do no damage to creatures there. This also means that no "head room" is necessary - ammo just flies out, never up.
* Catapults have a minimum range - at least 30 tiles.
* Catapults can and will fire over any creatures between them and their target.
* Neither are affected by [[fortification]]s.
* [[Siege operator]]s are "civilians", and as such they will run in fear if enemy units come too close to them. "Too close" varies somewhat, but may be as far as 10 tiles.

===Safety Warning===

'''Ballistae can and will kill anything in their path!''' Ballista arrows appear to hit any units in any square that the head passes through. They are devastatingly dangerous weapons, and should never be used with friendlies anywhere in their cone of fire, including the space the ballista arrowhead occupies when loaded on the engine. Always designate a [[traffic|restricted traffic area]] for a lot of tiles along the firing arc and keep dwarves out of the area or, better, wall off anything in front of them with fortifications to prevent all friendly traffic, or both. The shots appear to travel until they hit a wall or fly off the screen; the maximum range is about 150 tiles for an ordinary ballista.{{version|0.28.181.40d}} If the bolt passes through a [[tree]], the tree will disappear, presumably reduced to toothpicks.

Surprisingly, catapults are relatively safe. Catapult operators will target enemies (and wild [[animals]]) if there are any in their field of fire. If not, they will loose the shot in a high arc (not requiring additional [[z-level]]s, though) that misses everything until it lands. It is perfectly safe to operate a catapult in the cave: just point it at a nearby wall of solid rock. A nice side effect is that this will in due time clear the whole area of stone.

Using catapults to shoot into the open may provide some [[meat]]: as said above, the operators will target animals if there are any. However, [[elephant]]s don't take nicely if you slay some of them. You also have a slight risk of killing your own dwarves or [[caravan]] escorts if they happen to be hunting the selfsame animal (and hence are close to it).

==Using Siege Engines (advanced)==
===Placement===
Siege engines can almost only shoot at targets right in front of them on the same Z-level. The target may deviate only slightly, as the field of fire is about 20-30 degrees wide. Because of the huge blind spots, it is advisable to [[Fortress_defense#Siege_weapons|prepare the position]] so that the enemy will be channeled through the field of fire.

Siege operators are civilians! They will drop their work and run if the enemy comes too close, which is around 20 tiles. You should therefore place the engines behind a [[moat]] or a wall of [[fortification]]s that will keep the enemy at a safe distance, or shield access to their location in some other fashion.

Siege engines can shoot through [[fortification]]s, just like any other projectile weapon. As fortifications appear to provide some protection against incoming [[bolt]]s and [[arrow]]s, it's usually a good idea to protect the siege engine in that way. The siege engine only needs a one tile wide fortification to shoot out.

===Skill and Quality===

The quality of the siege engine parts affects the engine's accuracy and reload time. It is not known whether the siege engine itself also can be of a certain quality. The quality and material of the ammunition (in case of ballista arrows) affects the damage and possibly accuracy as well.

The only way of obtaining high-quality siege engine parts is to have them made by a trained engineer; the only way to train an engineer is to make parts or ammunition. Assembling and disassembling siege engines does not train the [[engineer]] skill. Dwarves will occasionally produce masterpieces long before reaching [[Legendary]] skill level, but be prepared to waste hundreds of logs until you have three masterpiece parts. Bringing an engineer to [[Experience|Proficient]] level (the highest you could buy when starting a new fortress) will take about 120 logs. Becoming Legendary requires the wood of 600 trees.

The operator skill certainly affects reload time. It will take a whole month for an unskilled dwarf to load a catapult; a Legendary operator with nearby ammo will get several shots at a running enemy. Operator skill has little or no effect on accuracy.

Operators are best trained on catapults, as these require nothing but cheap stone for ammo. It is recommended to have a number of dedicated operators that will follow no other line of work, and enough catapults for all of them to play with. As they're often going for a drink or sleep, you may get along with three catapults for four operators, and even two pieces would go a long way. Since the dwarf must hold the heavy stone in his inventory during the entire loading procedure, dwarves that have increased their strength statistic load catapults much more rapidly than others, making them good candidates for operator duty. You should start training early: it can take one year for an operator to become Proficient, and two more years until he finally reaches Legendary level; by then he will have spent 300 rounds.

Loading ballista arrows seems to be much faster than loading catapults, probably due to the much lighter weight of the projectile.

An alternative approach is cross-training any highly-skilled dwarves who aren't doing anything useful at the moment. With a couple levels each in strength and agility, a decent-quality catapult, and an ample supply of ammunition nearby, a dwarf can become a Legendary siege operator within a few seasons at most, giving more flexibility in defense and several more levels for the fortunate dwarf. [[Cross-training|Rotating]] Legendary [[miner]]s out to siege-operation and then to stone-hauling duties sets up an efficient cycle.

===In Battle===

Ballistae hit any unit that the ballista arrowhead passes through. This makes them an order of magnitude more effective in combat than catapults, which fire in an arc that hits only a few tiles per shot and is nearly useless against anything smaller than a troop of [[goblin]]s. Also, ballista arrows fired through too many successive targets will be destroyed or lost. The limit seems to be roughly 5-6 goblin-sized targets hit before the arrow is lost.

A siege engine you want to use for actual defense should be not set to fire at will, as this likely means that it's not loaded and ready at the time you actually need it. You should train your operators on other pieces.

When the time comes, switch off all training engines and set all of the ones you'll be using to prepare to fire so the operators will be on-station; if some of them are currently not loaded, designate them to be disassembled so to prevent your operators from loading the training weapons instead of firing the real ones.

Remember, operators are civilians. They do not care that the fortress is at stake: hunger, thirst and sleep always go first. That's why you trained more operators than you actually need; that's also why you disabled all other work that might distract them. The most effective way to ensure that your operators won't run off is to lock them in with the siege engine when the time comes.

===Ballista battery===

If you place ballistae close enough together, you can completely cover a two or three tile wide corridor. Because siege engines are 3x3, they need to be staggered, so each one fires through the edge of the one ahead of it. This can be dangerous for your operators. To minimize risk, place [[fortification]]s to keep dwarves from wandering too far, and have only one entrance to the ballista room. There is still some risk that dwarves might wander into the line of fire, even with no reason to do so.

: '''Three tile-wide corridor''' (battery room 5 tiles wide)
╦═══
══════════════════════════╦══╦══╩▐▀▀
Entrance++++++++++++▼\\\\\╬ ╩▐▀▀◄═« (~ammo~)
Entrance++++++++++++▼\\\\\╬▐▀▀◄═«▐▄▄
Entrance++++++++++++▼\\\\\╬◄═«▐▄▄ (~ammo~)
══════════════════════════╩▐▄▄ (~ammo~)
═════════
:*<tt>+</tt> - floor
:*<tt>═</tt> - wall
:*<tt>▼</tt> - ramp (down)
:*<tt>\</tt> - channel (aka "empty space" re this level)
:*<tt>╬</tt> - fortification
:*<tt>◄═«</tt> - center of ballistae

Due to the rare wild shot, the staggering should always be from one side to the other, and not put one ballista far ahead of the one it overlaps, as this may increase friendly-fire accidents.

Ammo storage can be on the same level, or via [[stair]]s or [[ramp]]s on another [[z-level]]. Expand the room as desired for more storage. Also note that ballista arrows are stored in [[Stockpile#Furniture_Storage|furniture stockpiles]], not ammo stockpiles.

An alternate strategy could be to place a [[floodgate]] or retracting [[bridge]] in the center of the 3x3 hallway, and activate it during times of crisis so that the Goblins are forced to fight in two separate 1x1 corridors rather than a single 3x3 corridor. If the corridors are further lined with spike traps and weapon traps, this combined defense can assure your dwarfs that any attempts to assault your base will be very, very bloody.

A drawbridge can be combined with the channeled area to provide a practice area, as discussed above. The channels would be accessible from the battery area via a staircase, keeping the dwarfs below/behind the lines of fire at all times.

----

'''See Also:'''
:*[[Defense design]]
:*[[cross-training#Army corps of engineers|Army corps of engineers]]

[[Category:Buildings]]
[[Category:Fortress defense]]

40d:Immigration

2009-09-19T03:09:27Z

Karl: /* How can I curb immigration? */

'''Immigration''' can occur during any [[season]]. A '''migrant''' is a member of a wave of immigration.

Migrants will spawn at the edge of your local zone and move towards any meeting area that you have designated. They will travel single file from this one location until the last one of this wave has arrived.

If there is no meeting zone they will simply sit at the edge of the map until their "migrant" status fades and they find a [[job]]. Keep in mind that they can spawn on '''any''' open edge of the map, on any Z-axis; if there is no available path to your [[fortress]], they will sit and wait until one is opened up or until they go crazy and die. Additionally, if you change orders so that Dwarves are not allowed outside ({{K|o}} - {{K|i}}) immediately after immigrants begin arriving they will freeze in place, with no path to your fortress. Some players have reported that their migrants spawn in the middle of nowhere. This behaviour is a bug, though an entertaining one.

By default, immigration will stop when your fortress reaches 200 or more, but you can change this in the [[init.txt]] file. It will take several years to reach this number, assuming you want to reach it at all. Once your population falls below this number, immigration will begin again.

== How immigration is calculated ==

Immigration figures are influenced by your fortress's total "Created [[Wealth]]", probably further influenced by reporting of the yearly dwarven [[caravan]].{{verify}} If, for any reason, the caravan does not arrive, or does not make it off the map alive the first year, no wealth is reported{{verify}}, and this will seriously hurt your chances for immigration.{{verify}} Later, if they fail to make it off your map, then the previous year's caravan report is used to determine the next immigration waves.{{verify}}. The other known factor that influences immigration is that dwarf deaths in your fortress will make immigrating dwarves scared, reducing immigrant numbers possibly down to zero. If this reduces the number of immigrants, the message announcing the seasonal immigrants will include comments to this effect.

Created Wealth is visible on the Status ({{K|z}}) screen once you get a [[broker]] with the [[appraiser]] skill). All objects with any [[value]] (including mined-out areas, [[bridge]]s, and just about every kind of created [[crafts|good]]) will be included in the total. [[Artifact]]s usually are one of the largest influences of fortress wealth. Artifacts made of precious resources and heavily [[decoration|decorated]] can potentially double fortress wealth early in the game. Forbidden items are included in your wealth "properly" as of [http://www.bay12games.com/dwarves/dev_now.html 09/02/2008].

It is not a hard formula - identical fortresses with identical created wealth will tend to get more or less based on that wealth, but can experience some differences in the exact number arriving. The wealth seems to create a target number, and the exact number of immigrants varies around that target.

Immigration is rarely greater than 24 dwarves per wave, not including [[pet]]s, [[children|kids]] and spouses, though rarely larger numbers have been reported.

Immigration will be stopped if your fortress reaches the Population Cap set in the [[init]] file, but a given wave may cause your total to exceed that number. If your current population is even 1 less than the Population Cap, a full wave of 2 dozen (or more?) immigrants can arrive.

== When does Immigration usually occur? ==
Usually you have to wait until the dwarven [[caravan]] arrives - and leaves alive - in [[Autumn]] to start the immigrants on their way. If the caravan reports a high Created Wealth ''(of perhaps over 60,000? - an approximate number, there is no hard formula or known cutpoint)'', you can expect to receive maybe eight or more migrants in [[Winter]] after the Caravan, and/or more in the [[Spring]] following. If your dwarves are extremely productive, immigration can occur before the caravan arrives, in Autumn or even in [[Summer]] of your first year. Even with low created wealth, immigration does usually begin in Spring of the second year on.

Migrants seem to have a greater tendency to arrive in Spring and in greater numbers, but can arrive in any season.

==Immigrants' skills==
Migrants are never very skilled. They arrive with one of the following mixes:
:* [[Peasant]]s - No skills at all
:* Novice level (level 1) of two or three related skills from a single [[profession]]
:* A (no adjective) level (level 2) of a single [[skill]]
:* A [[Soldier]] - Novice level each of [[wrestler]], [[armor user]], one [[Weapons#Weapon & Military Skills|weapon skill]] (and shield user if not a [[marksdwarf]])

Migrants will sometimes bring their unskilled [[spouse]]s, [[child]]ren, and even their [[pet]] [[animal]]s. Children can perform some jobs, and will slowly grow to become adults, and any adult dwarf can be given any job, and eventually learn that [[skill]] while performing that [[labor]].

=== How to influence the types of dwarves that immigrate ===
Note that the greater the number of dwarven [[civilization]]s, the greater your ability to influence immigration.{{verify}}

The immigrants' [[skills]]/[[jobs|careers]] might be influenced by the type and number of [[workshops]] available, but also might be influenced by the population of the surviving dwarven civilizations. (Similar to that [[goblin]]s sometimes have dwarves in their armies, that were previously snatched from you!)

[[Soldiers]] will only arrive if you have made their type of [[weapon]]; if you make one [[battle axe]], you will only get [[axedwarf|axedwarves]]. If you make a [[crossbow]] and a [[war hammer]], you will get [[marksdwarf|marksdwarves]] and [[hammerdwarf|hammerdwarves]]. This is not affected by weapons brought to your fort; getting immigrant [[woodcutter]]s won't let you get immigrant axedwarves. It is not known if the number of weapons created matters.{{verify}}

When you meet certain requirements in your outpost, like population or created wealth, some [[nobles]] will immigrate, like the [[Dungeon master]].

==Immigrant's equipment==
A migrant may not always come with the necessary equipment to perform their jobs. For example, a [[Wood cutter]] may or may not come with a [[battle axe]]. [[Soldiers]] may appear with only the clothes on their back, or geared up in full steel armor and weapon. Rarely, a migrant may come with equipment they ''don't'' need to do their jobs - for example, a [[Carpenter]] may come with a [[battle axe]].

== What are the drawbacks to immigration? ==
Most of the time, immigration is a ''Good Thing,'' and the more, the merrier. More dwarves means more work gets done (especially hauling, since immigrants are basically peasants), more dwarves can be given "luxury" tasks like defending the fortress or making [[dye]]d [[cloth]], and some nobles require a certain number of dwarves before they arrive. However, more dwarves also means more CPU cycles eaten up, especially if your fortress is already taxing on your computer.

Of course, additional dwarves also require additional [[bedroom]]s, workshops, and [[alcohol|booze]] before they can be properly productive, and some players prefer to increase their population slowly to allow them to add the extra infrastructure at a more sedate pace.

== How can I curb immigration? ==
The easiest method to handle immigration is to change the point when immigration stops in [[Init.txt#POPULATION|init.txt]], under "population_cap". You can first set it low and raise it as you see fit. Note that you may consider this to be cheating, and it also requires exiting the game each time you want more immigrants.

You can also make sure your fort does not produce or build much. Of course, this is not an especially interesting way to play the game. Since artifacts often account for most of your fortress' wealth, killing dwarves that enter [[strange mood]]s, or turning the moods off entirely in the init file, may be a better option. This can often be accomplished by making sure all your [[workshop]]s are in enclosed [[room]]s, then locking the [[door]] on them until they go [[insane]], then starve to death. This has a drawback in that dwarves that do manage to produce an artifact often gain a desirable [[legendary]] [[skill]]. Lock the door at your own discretion.

You can also kill the immigrants themselves, deliberately or otherwise. Large numbers of deaths will reduce immigration or prevent it entirely.

Several immigration messages are possible:

* ''A migrant have arrived.''
: This occurs when only one migrant come.
* ''Some migrants have arrived.''
: This is the normal message.
* ''Some migrants have arrived, despite the danger.''
: This occurs if there are many deaths but not enough to stop immigration.
* ''Some migrants have decided to brave this terrifying place, knowing it may be their tomb.''
: Appears to be caused by a lot of deaths (80+?) yet with a fortress wealthy enough (2 million?) to attract immigrants anyway.
* ''No one even considered making the journey to such a cursed death-trap this season.''
: Very large numbers of deaths at a fortress can cause all immigration (except nobles) to cease for a while: your fortress has gained a reputation as a deathtrap! Killing nobles seems to have a magnified effect here, and killing even a single noble can cause no immigrants to arrive in the next [[season]].

== Migrants in [[Adventure Mode]] ==
Roving bands of migrants may be found on the world map. These migrants can be linked to any of the major civilizations found on the world. This includes [[goblin]]s and [[kobold]]s. Such bands will consist of non-specialized adults and children.

== Migration Effects on the World ==
It is possible for migration to change the population levels of settlements on the map over time, and to cause factions of a civilization to merge. This can be discovered through talking to individuals in Adventurer mode, and will subsequently show up in [[Legends mode]].

[[Category:Dwarves]]
[[Category:World]]

{{Starting FAQ}}

Dwarf Fortress Wiki talk:Improvement Drive

2009-09-18T22:59:28Z

Karl: Created page with '== Advertisements == Instead of pursuing this kind of thing, why not go with paypal and ask for donation? I'm curious, why are you forking that much money for a simple wiki ? 60…'

User talk:Karl

2009-09-15T00:48:24Z

Karl:

40d:Fire

2009-09-14T22:14:34Z

Karl: clearly need d for dwarf, the fire example is just pure awesomness

'''Fire''' is not an individual item, but a condition that affects creatures and items. An item or creature is either on fire, or not. Adjacent items can catch fire if they are flammable - wood and cloth are examples of flammable items, stone and gems are not. Some items are especially flammable, such as [[coal]] or [[alcohol]].

Fire is exceptionally dangerous, more so than most [[creature]]s, in part because dwarves will not avoid fire nor will they react to it in any way, and so will happily walk into flames, catch fire and then spread it without a word of complaint. No [[announcement]] will be generated until a dwarf dies ("[[Urist]] McHotstuff has died in the heat"), which might be the first notice you get of the problem.
[[Image:Running around on fire.gif|thumb|right|250px|''(click to enlarge)'' '''!!'''Dwarves'''!!''' on fire (flashing red/yellow), and trailing [[smoke]].]]
A border of exclamation marks on an '''!!'''item'''!!''' or '''!!'''creature'''!!''' indicates that it is on fire. Items on fire also release [[smoke]] and can ignite adjacent items. Most burning items will eventually vanish, being completely consumed by the fire, but some take extremely long to do so. 

In the {{k|u}}nits list, the name of burning dwarves or creatures will flash, alternating quickly between yellow and red, similar to the graphic, right. (And may do so forever after the dwarf dies.)

The biggest danger is that fire can easily spread, setting other dwarves (who don't care) and items alight. Once something is on fire, either an object or a creature, there is very little you can do about it except quickly isolate them like some plague carrier, and wait for the inevitable. {{verify}}

=== A typical example ===

{{D for Dwarf}}

:# While you're not watching (of course), a [[furnace operator]] gets hit by fireball from a [[fire imp]] while working at the [[magma smelter]].
:# The furnace operator then runs around on his business, smelting [[coke]], and sets fire to both the [[charcoal]] stockpile, and a [[bituminous coal]] vein.
:# As he does this he takes burning damage.
:# Now [[wound]]ed, he heads for the [[barracks]] for a rest.
:# The dwarf dies on the way, and his (still burning) clothes fall to the side. ''(Somehow, let's say you miss the announcement of his death - the game doesn't pause or re-center, so it wouldn't be the first time.)''
:# A peasant comes and picks up his '''!!'''[[giant cave spider]] [[silk]] [[shoe]]'''!!''' and puts it on. His clothing catches on fire.
:# He goes to the surface and starts a [[forest fire]], which distracts you for some time. You think the forest fire caught him on fire, not the other way around.
:# Meanwhile, your legendary [[armorer]] grabs some '''!!'''charcoal'''!!''' for a new steel project. Soon, he's a '''!!'''legendary armorer'''!!''' (but not for long...)
:# A [[hauler]] grabs some armor in the forge where the charcoal is burning, catches fire, and sets fire to the leather armor items in the armor stockpile, and/or the rows of wooden bins there.
:# A miner finds the burning coal vein, and becomes a '''!!'''miner'''!!'''.
:# One of these dwarves soon feels hurt also, and heads for the barracks to rest, getting on a [[wood]]en [[bed]] and lighting that up.
:# Another goes and has a drink, setting fire to the ''highly'' flammable booze stockpiles - kaboom.
:# Nearby beds and food stockpiles light up; dwarves sleep on those [[bed]]s and the others near it and get lit up themselves, as well as the dwarves going for a drink or meal, and for the '''!!'''[[cave spider]] [[silk]] [[robe]]'''!!'''.
:# The announcements about all the dwarves that have "died in the heat" start pouring in - you don't miss these.
:# You find the burning coal vein and miner, and blame it on him, wondering when and why he went outside into the forest fire.
:# Now a fair portion of the fortress is on fire, but you can't do anything about it, and can't see what's happening very well for all the smoke.
:# To save what dwarves you can, you <A>ctivate them, and so some and go to the burning armor bins to get '''!!'''armored'''!!''' up.
:# Those few who do manage to get out unlit have all lost several friends and loved ones, and a [[tantrum|tantrum spiral]] is now unavoidable. Those few soon go [[insane]] and throw themselves into the river in a final ironic act.

Wasn't that [[fun]]?

==Forest fires==

===Origins===
Creatures such as [[Fire imp]]s can cause a forest fire by igniting a creature with a fire attack. If grass also ignites, the fire will slowly spread to all connected grass, generating smoke as it burns. Fire turns [[grass]] into ashes, but not usable [[ash|ashes]]. Anything that is flammable and stands on burning grass (if you loo{{k|k}} at it you will see "A fire") has a chance to catch fire each turn.

===Preventing forest fires===
It is recommended to guard the surroundings of an exterior [[magma]] pool with [[Marksdwarf|Marksdwarves]] so that creatures don't have a chance to light anything up (except the Marksdwarves themselves, but this is unlikely if they are well trained). Having walls or better yet fortifications all around the pools is likely to prevent all possible forest fires. Strangely [[grizzly bear]]s seem to be ineffective against such a threat.

Alternatively, pour water on top of the pool to turn it to [[obsidian]], sealing it. (But what a waste of magma!)

===Protecting from forest fires===
Since dwarves will not pay attention to fires , and dwarves will rush to move their dead friends to the graveyard, you may end up very quickly with heavy casualties if you do not {{k|o}}rder all dwarves to stay {{k|i}}nside. If you have precious items and buildings outside, it is also possible to dig a [[channel]] to stop the fire from spreading any more (they are cheaper then walls, offer the same protection and, most importantly, are much faster to create).

Know however that merchants will not pay anymore attention to the fire than your own dwarves, so you may also want to protect them in the same fashion, even if it should change their path, otherwise they could all happily walk into flames when leaving the region (or worse, stand for days on "A fire").

===Irregularities===
Forest fires present certain irregularities that you should take in consideration {{version|0.28.181.40d}}:
*[[Trees]], [[plants]] and other [[map tile]]s will '''not''' be destroyed in the fire. That makes them very easy to spot after a forest fire, and also a possible (if unlikely) natural defense. [[Items]], however, may burn.
*Grassy slopes will not catch on fire, thus preventing the fire from spreading across z-levels.
*Forest fires, no matter how big, will never cross a [[channel]] or a non-wooden [[road]]. However, they ''will'' go through closed doors. {{verify}}
*In you start a fire in adventure mode, it will not spread if temperature is turned off.

==Use as a weapon==
This is not recommended, although some success has been reported with the Booze Bomb trap (which consists of a [[fire imp]] in a [[cage]] linked to a [[lever]], standing near an [[alcohol]] stockpile so that it can be released when the enemy get near). It should be noted that this is a criminal waste of good liquor (unless you use crap like Prickle Berry Wine, Sewer Brew or Gutter Cruor..).

== [[Adventure Mode]] ==
In adventurer mode, it's possible to ignite trees and shrubs with {{k|g}}. The possibilities for killing wolves with the burning corpses of other wolves should not be overlooked. (It should be noted that the {{k|T}}ravel function puts out any inconvenient fires on yourself and your collection of "'''!!'''wolf head'''!!'''"s, which will probably end up as "Xwolf headX" after your trip). Since steel items do not burn, it is possible to kill friendly guards by setting the right location on fire, and when the hapless speardwarf perishes, heading back and taking his spear to use as a throwing weapon.

[[Category:Physics]]

40d:How do I increase the value of a room

2009-09-02T15:17:06Z

Karl: Undo revision 41283822 by Karl (Talk) // Didn't see the construction sub section -_-'

[[Category:Stub]]

=Wall and Floor quality=

==Material==
Digging a room within a layer consisting of [[obsidian]] or [[flux]] will inherently give it a higher value than a room built inside a mundane stone such as granite or gabbro. Additionally, veins or clusters of precious minerals (whether [[ore]]s or [[gem]]s) which pass through the room can provide a dramatic boost in value.

==Engraving==
[[Room quality]] can be increased by [[smooth|smoothing]] and [[engrave|engraving]] the walls and the [[floor]].
Stone can be smoothed by any skilled dwarf without decreasing quality, but always engrave with more skillful Dwarves as unskilled Dwarves will permanently prevent you from putting a nice engraving there.

==Construction==
Constructing floors in a room using high-value building components (such as [[aluminum]] or [[platinum]] bars, or perhaps [[soap]] made from [[megabeast]] fat) can dramatically increase the value of a room if its location is important but valuable stones do not occur in the region. Note that constructed floors cannot be engraved, and constructing a floor on top of an existing engraving will destroy the engraving, resulting in the usual consequences of [[engraving#Art defacement|art defacement]].

=Furniture=
==Lever==
[[Lever]]s count as furniture for the purpose of increasing room value, and an unlimited number of mechanisms can be connected to a lever simply by linking it to an object and subsequently deconstructing said object (either directly, or by simply pulling the lever if the object is a [[cage]], [[restraint]], or [[support]]).

==Trap==
Weapons not being used by your dwarves (whether due to your military structure or due to the weapon being inherently unusable) can be placed in weapon traps, and traps located in a room will increase the value of the room by the value of all components. A trap containing an artifact weapon can easily max out a room's quality. This works for both conventional weapon traps and upright spears. As an added bonus, a strategically placed menacing spike in an annoying [[Noble]]'s room can also be employed for the purpose of arranging an [[unfortunate accident]].

==Cages==
[[Cages]] seem to add the value of the animals occupying them to the room value, and you can store unlimited amounts of animals in one cage.

==Other items==
[[Coffins]] not set to burial are not considered rooms and so can be built in other rooms without decreasing that room's value. This takes up space, but you do have to put the coffins somewhere anyways. You might as well get value from them.

[[Category:Guides]]

40d:How do I increase the value of a room

2009-09-02T15:15:24Z

Karl: /* Material */

[[Category:Stub]]

=Wall and Floor quality=

==Material==
Digging a room within a layer consisting of [[obsidian]] or [[flux]] will inherently give it a higher value than a room built inside a mundane stone such as granite or gabbro. Additionally, veins or clusters of precious minerals (whether [[ore]]s or [[gem]]s) which pass through the room can provide a dramatic boost in value.

Alternatively, you can construct walls/floors with different [[material]]s, instead of using the default stone where you mined the room. A [[gold]]en room will be worth a lot more than an obsidian one. If you have the available material ready, it will take just a little bit more time to do, and you'll achieve great improvement.

Don't forget each dwarfs have [[preference]]s, a gabbro room might be worth a lot for certain dwarf.

==Engraving==
[[Room quality]] can be increased by [[smooth|smoothing]] and [[engrave|engraving]] the walls and the [[floor]].
Stone can be smoothed by any skilled dwarf without decreasing quality, but always engrave with more skillful Dwarves as unskilled Dwarves will permanently prevent you from putting a nice engraving there.

==Construction==
Constructing floors in a room using high-value building components (such as [[aluminum]] or [[platinum]] bars, or perhaps [[soap]] made from [[megabeast]] fat) can dramatically increase the value of a room if its location is important but valuable stones do not occur in the region. Note that constructed floors cannot be engraved, and constructing a floor on top of an existing engraving will destroy the engraving, resulting in the usual consequences of [[engraving#Art defacement|art defacement]].

=Furniture=
==Lever==
[[Lever]]s count as furniture for the purpose of increasing room value, and an unlimited number of mechanisms can be connected to a lever simply by linking it to an object and subsequently deconstructing said object (either directly, or by simply pulling the lever if the object is a [[cage]], [[restraint]], or [[support]]).

==Trap==
Weapons not being used by your dwarves (whether due to your military structure or due to the weapon being inherently unusable) can be placed in weapon traps, and traps located in a room will increase the value of the room by the value of all components. A trap containing an artifact weapon can easily max out a room's quality. This works for both conventional weapon traps and upright spears. As an added bonus, a strategically placed menacing spike in an annoying [[Noble]]'s room can also be employed for the purpose of arranging an [[unfortunate accident]].

==Cages==
[[Cages]] seem to add the value of the animals occupying them to the room value, and you can store unlimited amounts of animals in one cage.

==Other items==
[[Coffins]] not set to burial are not considered rooms and so can be built in other rooms without decreasing that room's value. This takes up space, but you do have to put the coffins somewhere anyways. You might as well get value from them.

[[Category:Guides]]

40d:How do I increase the value of a room

2009-09-02T15:07:53Z

Karl: Added guides category